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UK Customs replace “Nothing to declare” signs with “Abandon All Hope...

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Following the news that Boris Johnson has been elected Prime Minister UK Customs officials have decided to replace all the 'Nothing to Declare' signs...

World in shock as man with history of taking steroids runs...

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The World is in shock today after a bloke who has a well documented history of taking performance enhancing drugs ran a bit faster than a bloke who doesn't.

50 migrants in canoes rescued off Kent coast forced to return...

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A search and rescue operation has recovered 50 migrants off the Kent coast, the Home Office has said. As spokesman said the Border Force had...

Just £3 a month will pay for cocaine and child prostitutes...

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A new fundraising campaign from Oxfam appealing to the better nature of child abusers is asking for just £3 a month to pay for...

Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend

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Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...

Dead mice brought in by cats to be declared part of...

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Cat-owners are now being asked to count any rodents or birds left on their doorstep as declarable earnings in their application for means-tested benefits,...

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