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I’ve already wrapped all my Christmas presents, say terrifying psychopaths

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Terrifying psychopaths around the country have taken time out from planning murders and disembowelling their neighbour's pets to tell The Rochdale Herald that they...

Aung San Suu Kyi surrenders Freedom of Dublin refusing to share...

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Burmese leader Aung San Suu Kyi has given up her Freedom of the city of Dublin in protest at sharing the distinction with Bono,...

Scotland’s oldest man dies aged 35

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Tributes have been paid to Gregor McGregor, Scotland's oldest man who died today aged 35.  An angry man with an impenetrable accent told us, "It's...

Lord Sugar to humiliate 18 tossers in annual quest to find...

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Hairy scrotum faced narcissist and entrepreneur, Lord Sugar, has launched his annual challange to find the UK's biggest arsehole after himself. The one time Klingon...

Three dead on final day of Poundworld closing down sale

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Questions are being raised following the trampling of three shoppers in riots on the final day of opening of Poundworld at Sheffield Heeley Retail...

Thousands gather in North Yorkshire to see world’s first completely empty...

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There is more travel misery anticipated for the rest of the week as tens of thousands of people are expected to continue making their...

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