Tuesday, December 18, 2018
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Quentin D Fortesqueue

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.

Satire Aid has bought 3,500 presents worth more than £31,000!

A quick Satire Aid update for you. The amazing readers of The Rochdale Herald, NewsThump, Tuckered, U Ok Hun and Angry People in Local...
Britannia Hotel

Homeless virgin gives birth in Britannia Hotel car park after being told no room...

News is coming in that a homeless virgin has given birth to a baby boy in the car park of the Royal Hull Hotel...
Heating on

Northern Dad puts heating on

Confirmed reports are in that a Northern Dad in Lancashire has put the central heating on. Airports throughout the UK have been closed, all trains...
Sad Child

Facebook ruining Christmas for kids in poverty

Facebook in their infinite wisdom have smashed the holy hell out of the reach of comedy pages likes ours, NewsThump, Tuckered and SNN. Apparently they...
Deep Space

Theresa May’s credibility leaves solar system

Theresa May's credibility has become the third human-made object to travel into interstellar space less than two years after her mission began. It passed through...
Alan Rickman

There’s nothing more Christmassy than seeing German Terrorist fall out of window, confirm men

Men around the world have confirmed that it's not Christmas until they have seen either a German terrorist or a half naked prostitute fall...

Conservative Christmas Party cancelled after failing to negotiate piss up deal with brewery

There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled. The news comes after many...

Dipshit to argue with Thicko about terrible idea

A thicko has accepted a dipshit's challenge of a debate on the telly to sort of discuss how best to implement a dreadful idea. The...

Only 23 days to save historic Christmas Deal, warn turkeys

Turkeys have declared that today there are only 23 days to save their historic Christmas deal. They have warned that is vitally important that the...
Satire Aid

Update – Barnardo’s children now receiving gifts from the Satire Aid appeal

Presents bought through the Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal on Sunday 2nd and Monday 3rd December will benefit children and young people supported by...
Mark Carney

Something that hasn’t happened might or might not make something bad happen, clarifies Bank...

Something that might or might not happen could or could not send the pound plunging or not plunging and trigger, or maybe even not...
hummus

Northern supermarket to trial hummus

News is breaking that a well-known northern supermarket is to start selling hummus at some stores at some point in 2021. It is thought that...
Satire Aid

Satire Aid 2018 total is 1,600 presents worth £15,200 so far

You guys are amazing! As you may know we are running our second annual Secret Santa to buy gifts for children who otherwise wouldn't...

UKIP appoint woman who put that cat in wheelie bin as advisor on cat...

The collection of gammon faced halfwits known as the UK Independence party has appointed the internationally famous cat abuser Mary Bale as an advisor...
Plate of Mince

Nadine Dorries replaced as MP for Mid Bedfordshire with nice plate of warm mince

Following her bizarre statement in which she decried the Brexit deal as leaving the U.K. with no MEPs and no representation on the EU...
Satire Aid

The Big Fat Secret Santa – Satire Aid 2018

You may remember that last year we partnered with some other brilliant satirists to run a Secret Santa for underprivileged children. Well it really, really...

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