Theresa May

Theresa May admits using ‘BREXOMATHICS’ to calculate number of overstaying foreign students

"It's so simple, you take a real number and keep doubling it until everyone's eyes light up," explained May pointing out that it worked splendidly for calculating the amount of money the UK doesn't...
Queue

Border Free Travel sounds like a good idea, says Brexit voter who queued four...

A Brexit voter who spent four hours queueing in passport control has suggested that maybe border free travel in Europe is a good thing.Jo King, 46, from Rochdale, has just got back from a...
Fat Man on Beach

I’m not an immigrant, I’m British says Britain First supporter who lives on the...

When asked what he would describe himself as, as an Englishman abroad, he will usually say something like: “Im an export int I”

British expats outraged as boat full of migrants wash up on their Spanish beach

Beachgoers were surprised by the sight of dozens of migrants scrambling out of the surf today at the Playa de los Alemanes resort in Spain’s Cadiz province.A vessel carrying migrants from the north African...
Katie Hopkins

Katie Hopkins killed and eaten by starving migrants

Mail Online columnist Katie Hopkins' plan to drown migrants attempting to cross the Mediterranean to prevent them coming to the UK has been put on hold after the controversial hatemonger was killed and eaten...
French Military

French Head of Military resigns after Macron cuts £1bn from White Flag Budget

General Pierre de Villiers today sensationally quit as Head of the French Military in a row over cuts to the French White Flag budget.General de Villiers said that if the budget cuts went through...
Spanish Inquisition

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition, says King Felipe of Spain

During his state visit, the king of Spain addressed the British parliament yesterday. All went well until the king dropped the G-bomb: Gibraltar.A body of Conservative MPs, led by Sir Roderick Bartleby-McSmythe MP...
Ceuta

Ceuta is nothing like Gibraltar, King Felipe of Spain tells UK without hint of...

The Spanish King called for a deal on the status of Gibraltar yesterday. King Felipe VI clarified in no uncertain terms that:“The status of Gibraltar, a 6.7km2 British Overseas Territory located on the Southern...
water cannon

German Police deploy hydration wagons to cool off crowd outside G20 summit

Police in Hamburg Germany have deployed Mobile Hydration Wagons in an effort to cool down overheated and thirsty crowds gathered out side the G20 Summit, which is currently hosting talks between world leaders.Police liaison...
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of a four day European tour.Speaking in front of a large...

Police fear French blogger killed in whipped cream accident may have topped herself

The international irony reservoir was overflowing this week as news came through that French lifestyle and fitness blogger, Becky Fromage-Burger, was slain in her own kitchen.Mlle. Fromage-Burger, who is renowned for appearing on the...
Happy Children

Tower Block residents look forward to less health and safety legislation post Brexit

A recent survey of tenants living in firetrap and substandard accommodation has showed overwhelming support for abolishing laws designed to protect them.The survey for think tank GovBalls has found that 90% of tenants would...
Tim Farron

PG tips bribery scandal uncovered as Tim Farron makes ‘put the kettle on’ jibe

In the wake of the Leaders debate on the BBC, it has been alleged that lib dem leader Tim Farron was paid a substantial amount by PG Tips to make his closing remark.Farron took the opportunity...
Macron

Macron roasts Le Swan

Emmanuel Macron last night served up a beautifully roasted swan at his victory dinner. The new French President was celebrating his victory with close supporters at a private event in Paris when he wowed...
Nigel Farage with Hitler moustache

Farage Demands Second French Presidential Election

Nigel Farage has claimed the victory of Macron over Le Pen of 65% v 35% is scandalous. Just inappropriate. Undemocratic. Pathetic."Fifty two to forty eight. That's the proper margin. That allows those like myself...
Bomb Squad

May tells Merkel,”This is just a taste of what I’ve got”.

News reports this morning state that the entire city of Hannover is to be evacuated following the discovery of numerous unexploded WW2 bombs.Apparently, Theresa May ordered the ordinance dropped on the German city to...

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