Putin

David Cameron becomes Hero of the Russian Federation

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The Kremlin announced today that David Cameron is to be recognised as a Hero of the Russian Federation, the highest honour that can be...

Expat Moans About EU Citizens in UK

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A British expat has hailed Parliament's rejection of EU citizens' right to stay in the UK post Brexit. Speaking from beside his swimming pool at...
Trump with manbun

NATO leaders issue declaration of unity against Donald Trump

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NATO leaders have issued a statement of unity aimed at preserving the alliance against Donald Trump. One spokesman said, "It may seem strange that we're...
Marine Le Pen

Marine Le Pen demands Malian be charged with breaking and entering

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Marine Le Pen has demanded to know why a Malian refugee was given citizenship and not arrested for breaking and entering over the weekend....
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

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US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...
Illegal Immigrants boarding ship

New Technology Foils Illegal Immigrants

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In conjunction with the British Government-funded wall in Calais, British officials are working with maritime consultants on methods to physically prevent illegal immigrants from...
Trump

You had some very fine people on both sides, Trump tells D-Day veterans

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Donald Trump has told D-Day veterans that there were very fine people on both sides of the battles to control the Normandy Beaches during...

Macron wants UK to give him head in return for Bayeux tapestry

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Monarchists were today outraged by the suggestion by Emmanuel Macron, President of France, that the severed heads of the British royal family would be...

Remain campaigners thwarted by import shortage of “I Told You So”s

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Anti-Brexit campaigners are suffering from a shortage of "I Told You So"s, as "Project Fear" rapidly swings into "Operation I Told You So", as...

DUP ask Merkel for one billion Euros to give her their support in Bundestag

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News broke this morning that the Northern Ireland political party, the DUP, has demanded one billion euros from Angela Merkel in order to support...
Spanish Inquisition

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition, says King Felipe of Spain

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During his state visit, the king of Spain addressed the British parliament yesterday. All went well until the king dropped the G-bomb: Gibraltar. A...
The Pope

Top Vatican paedophiles and the Pope claim Transgender people are ‘crime against God’

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Frock wearing top Catholic wizard Pope Francis has decided that transgender people are a crime against God. "They teach children -children!- that they can choose...

EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…

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Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...

God refuses to put out Notre Dame fire until he gets 100,000 likes =...

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The 14th century cathedral has already lost one of its spires and a large section of roof in the blaze after a fire broke...

May to appeal to Supreme Court ruling at European Court of Justice

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In a move that has thoroughly confused political observers, Theresa May has instructed the Attorney General to appeal today's Supreme Court judgement on Article...
Beekeeper

Beekeeper stung to death after Danish Police force him to remove veil

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Denmark was in shock today after a Danish beekeeper was stung to death in a tragic apiculture accident in Denmark. The news comes just days...

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