Gun old lady

Why does this keep happening, ask imbeciles who keep selling guns to people who...

Fuckwits in America who keep blocking gun control reform have been forced to once again ask the question “why do mass shootings happen over and over again?”At least twenty seven people have been shot...

Trump rage over #takeafinger protests

Donald Trump has demanded "they fire these sons of bitches" over the growing #takeafinger protests.A woman pictured raising her middle finger toward Trump's motorcade has reportedly been fired from her job over the photograph.The...

Americans relieved to learn shooter was atheist

Concerned Americans were today relieved to hear that the Texas shooting was carried out by a human rights supporting atheist.Initially, US citizens were horrified to hear that the worst ever mass shooting in Texas...

First shipment of thoughts and prayers arrive in Texas

It’s all better in Texas now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Sutherland following last night’s mass shooting.Our special correspondent in Nevada writes:“Yeah, we’re crating up the thoughts...
Trump Golf Twitter

Trump to play 25 rounds of golf in honour of Texan dead

Donald Trump has defended a decision to play 25 rounds of golf in Japan saying it's in honour of the dead in Texas.The gesture came as another mass shooting in America, took the number...
White House

It’s too soon since last mass shooting and not long enough before next to...

In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a church at Sutherland Springs in Texas that has claimed the lives of at least 27 people The White House has released a statement saying...

Turning Trump off and on again doesn’t seem to have done any good

The White House Head of IT has expressed his heightened concern that the Presidency could be heading for a critical outage.Head of IT Maurice Moss explained his concern today that White House bandwidth has...

Having dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only bad when Hillary does it,...

Having Dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only a bad thing when it is done by the likes of Hillary Clinton, Fox News announced today.In their official statement, Fox News stated categorically that...
Trump Child

Department of Justice confirms that if indicted Trump will be tried as an adult

The Department of Justice has confirmed that if and when Donald Trump is indicted for colluding with Russia during the 2016 Presidential election he will have to stand trial as an adult.The U.S. Department...
Francis Underwood

Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President

Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment.Whilst his Presidency has been marred by a number of controversies, FPOTUS Underwood...
Pumpkin

Halloween pumpkin mistaken for President Trump

The embarrassing incident occurred after Ivanka left the pumpkin in the Oval Office. A meeting of President Trump’s closest advisors failed to realise that it was a jack o’lantern in the chair, not the...

For the last time, Trump is nothing like Hitler. Hitler fought in a...

If Hitler had practiced golf as much as Trump, maybe he'd have made it out of the bunkerDonald J. Trump, the four times decorated draft dodge veteran, is in no way like Hitler. This...
Trump Salute

Trump demands to see soldier’s long form death certificate

Donald Trump has demanded that the widow of Sgt La David Johnson release his long form death certificate following a row about whether or not Donald believes her that her husband is actually dead.Donald,...

Trump says crying widow knew what she was getting into when she answered phone

President Donald Trump has responded to criticism that he mishandled a phone call with the grieving widow of an American serviceman killed in an ambush in Niger by saying she's making it all up...
Sorry Trump

Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem

President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband didn’t stand for the national anthem.Myeshia Johnson, widow of Sgt...

Toymaker confesses he made Melania Trump to keep Pinocchio company

A Tuscan toymaker has ended days of speculation by confessing he made a new female doll to keep his infamous, lying, long nosed boy Pinocchio company.“He already had a human wife,” Mister Geppetto admitted,...

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