Toxic Sign

Trump gives a shot in the arm to 2020 Darwin Awards

President Donald Trump has thrown an unexpected and much appreciated lifeline to the 2020 Darwin Awards. The well-known website which describes itself as  a "salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who...

Not enough guns in America according to experts

In the aftermath of the shocking shooting of children and teachers in a Florida High School, Americans have been quick to point out there clearly is a gun shortage right across the land of...

First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California

It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting. "Yeah, we're crating up the thoughts and prayers from the Jacksonville shooting...

US WWII veterans arrested after Trump bans anti-fascists

In extraordinary scenes the US Secret Service have rounded up and imprisoned several second world war veterans after Donald Trump announced the banning of anti-fascists. The family of 98 year old Anthony Di Napoli told...
Donald Genius Trump

The ‘J’ is for Genius, confirms Donald J Trump

Washington - The actual real life President of the United States of America Donald J Trump has cleared up speculation over the weekend about what his middle name is. The leader of the free world...

Melania Trump faces criticism for wearing “Exterminate” t-shirt to Holocaust Memorial

Melania Trump is faces yet more criticism today after wearing a Dalek’s t-shirt during a visit to the Holocaust Memorial in Berlin.
Rambo on a horse

Producers of Rambo 3 sue Donald Trump for plagiarising film plot for Afghanistan strategy

The producers of Rambo 3 are allegedly suing Donald Trump for copyright infringements based on his Afghanistan strategy. Mr Trump was initially very cold on keeping the US in Afghanistan but, after seeing pictures of...
Rock Paper Scissors

Trump and Putin fail to beat each other in two hour long rock, paper,...

Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin met face to face for the first time in public yesterday and went for each other in a rock, paper, scissor handshake test. The world’s media were watching and...
Duke Brothers

Trump Presidency revealed as elaborate Duke Brothers $1 bet

Reclusive Wall Street tycoons the Duke Brothers have been at it again, this time betting against US Democracy.

We did have a Kermit at protest insist violent alt-left anti-Nazi protestors

The anti-Nazi protestors who were in Charlottesville over the weekend have responded furiously to Donald Trump's remarks this morning releasing a statement which read. "We definitely had a Kermit at the protest. He was front...
Francis Underwood

Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President

Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment. Whilst his Presidency has been marred by a number of controversies, FPOTUS Underwood...
trump salute

Donald Trump autobiography ‘My Struggle’ set for December release

A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early December just in time for Christmas. The book, titled "My Struggle" will focus largely on his...
Mike Pence

Jesus definitely said ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me, so I can...

The US Vice President, Mike Pence, has told reporters that the Trump administration's policy of keeping child migrants in cages is definitely consistent with the teachings of Jesus Christ.  Speaking at a press conference late last...

College Professor assaults Trump supporter

A college professor in the US has come under fire from leading figures in the Republican Party after he allegedly assaulted a number of completely innocent Trump supporters during a visit to the Middle...

Donald Trump hires Hugo Boss to design new ‘Cabinet Uniform’

The controversial decision to hire Hugo Boss was openly discussed by The President-elect, Donald J. Trump, on Good Morning America yesterday during a catwalk segment. When asked about his favourite clothing label, Mr. Trump, apparently...
Trump Baby

Trump eats baby in front of mother during rally

Donald Trump hit a new low today by disembowelling a newborn baby and eating her still beating heart like an apple after she interrupted him during a speech at a rally. The esteemed political philosopher...

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