Mutineers

Daily Telegraph releases images of MPs it thinks should wear EU flag armbands

The Daily Telegraph has today released photos of the M.P's it says should wear arm bands that signify their mutineer status.The paper says that the armbands should be in the design of the EU...

Local journalist creates entire article from on line forum comments.

A journalist at a Sheffield local newspaper has admitted that an entire article published in Friday's edition of the Sheffield Councilpleaser was constructed entirely from the frothings of the readership on the publication's forum...
Rochdale Christmas Market

Town centre with a load of sheds in it having some sort of Christmas...

A town in the north west has signalled that it is having a Christmas market by erecting several sheds and a large tent in the centre.Resident Bill Board said, "Brilliant, it'll be just like...
Teenage Pregnancy

Sex education in primary schools should be banned, says Burnley gran, 19

Sex education has been given the thumbs down by Burnley gran Ellie-Mae-Leigh Horne. 19 year old Ellie-Mae-Leigh, whose eldest daughter Chelsea-Leigh has just given birth herself, was outraged."It just shouldn't happen, innit," she said,...
oldham

Fears grow for BBC Explorer missing in Oldham

The alarm was raised today after BBC documentary maker and explorer Professor Robert Falcon failed to emerge from Oldham after missing his rendezvous with the armoured extraction convoy, the 48 bus, by three hours.The...
Babybel

Criticism as Babybel announces ‘Baby Cheeses’ advent calendar

The company that makes Babybel cheese has faced criticism from a right wing group over its "Baby Cheeses" advent calendar.The company had announced the launch of the advent calendar yesterday. It features a different...

Man who once burnt a Pot Noodle looking forward to another night of shouting...

A man whose cooking skills don't extend beyond pressing the 'start' button on his microwave is looking forward to another night of shouting at 'Masterchef: The Professionals'.Gary Taylor, 36, intends to spend most of...

Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW

A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that they will be supporting Brazil in the football.Artemisa Yousir, originally...
Badger

Badger fed up with receiving ‘Bristle-enhancing Pills’ emails

Brock Hampstead, a male badger from the New Forest, has started a campaign targeting what he claims is speciesist profiling by advertisers."I know that advertising works to strict algorithms, I'm not an idiot, but...
Mo Farah

QUEEN defends herself from MUSLIM IMMIGRANT with SWORD

According to reports in the Daily Mail today the Queen has been forced to defend herself from a marauding Muslim immigrant with a sword.A Daily Express staff witness said: "Liz was forced to tap...
Larry the Cat

Larry the Downing Street Cat responds to allegations of sexual misconduct: These stories are...

Disgraced veteran mouser Larry the Downing Street Cat on Friday admitted to allegations of sexual misconduct that were levelled against him earlier in the week.In the statement, which was shared with The Rochdale Herald,...

That God person is a pervert say parents of transgender kids

A primary school has become the center of a row when it taught religion to transgender pupils.St Andgreavsey's primary school faced a parents revolt after the largely transgender pupils were taught that...
Countryfile

BBC Countryfile Filming Suspended After Presenter Gets Parking Ticket

Filming of cutting edge BBC show Countryfile was dramatically suspended last night after one of the presenters was accused of parking illegally.Previously well respected veteran broadcaster, John Craven, was issued with a fixed penalty...
Black Friday

White nationalists boycott Black Friday claiming all Fridays matter

A number of white nationalist groups have joined together in a boycott against the post-Thanksgiving consumer event known as Black Friday.Black Friday has been an annual event in the US for many years and...
Earl Grey

Earl Grey tea is actually horrible, admit people who drink it

A woman from Rochdale has admitted that she doesn't really like Earl Grey tea because it tastes horrible.Winifred Barbarella from Milnrow (35 and three quarters), who wishes to remain anonymous, is an unemployed personal...
Puppy Christmas

John Lewis Christmas advert shows puppy being fed into blender

Retailer John Lewis has released its Christmas advert for 2017 which shows a cute puppy being fed into an industrial strength blender.The eagerly anticipated two minute clip, directed by Quentin Tarantino, shows the blending...

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