Family dog doesn’t understand why you reward your children with food

Malcolm, an inner city border collie, has spoken exclusively to the Rochdale Herald and explained he does not understand why the children in his home are constantly rewarded with food.“The kids are a pain...
Rochdale paramedics

10 injured after multi trolley pile up in dash to newly opened til at...

Reports are coming in that there has been a serious collision at Middleton Lidl. So far emergency services have rescued 10 people, including an employee, who have been injured in a multi trolley pile...

Rochdale vale terrorised by 1% outlaw motorhome gangs

Rochdale is in the grips of an outlaw Caravaner gang; who are terrorising wild life, being a public nuisance and brawling with dog walkers over the use of picnic tables at the Hollingworth...

Cheap bottle of wine is eventually returned to original gift giver

A bottle of £3.50 red wine from Lidl, which was brought to a house warming has finally been returned to the cheapskate couple that originally bought it.The bottle has been gifted an estimated twelve...

Estate agent knows you want to fire him

Terry Thomas, 33, a south London real estate agent, is aware every single one of his clients wants to fire him.Mr Thomas has been working for his current agency, Imcomp & Tense, on a...

DNA analysis of white poo on Rochdale street reveals that it comes from a...

Experts tracking down rogue dog owners in Rochdale came up with the shocking news that prehistoric species are alive and kicking. What's more, the anachronistic creatures have been tracked down.A small nest of the...
Fission Chips

There’s a bloke works in our chip shop and he swears he’s Kim Jong...

A Rochdale fish and chip shop owner has been telling us how one of his employees is convinced he Kim Jong Un.Ray Fry told us, "A few months ago we put an ad in...

Had an accident that wasn’t your fault? No? Want one? – Rochdale Herald TripsAdvisor...

Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault and that could net you £thousands in compensation? No? Well do you want one?Today the Rochdale Herald launches its TripsAdvisor App - telling you the...

Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories

An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert.Roy Bader, 72, who's never been to Dorset or Yorkshire said, "When i were a...

Hull favourite for Turner prize for ironic depiction of City of Culture

Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year.The famed port city and its people have been shortlisted for ironically depicting a city of culture...

Rochdale woman who found Hitler’s face on slice of toast converts to Nazism

A Rochdale woman who found Hitlers face in a slice of toast has revealed she's converted to Nazism.The woman's son said, "About a week after she found Hitlers face in the toast I went...

‘If it wasn’t for your size I’d eat you’ cat admits to owner

An honest cat has admitted to its owner that the only reason it hasn’t eaten her is down to her relative size.The cat explained that it will gladly kill and eat just about any...

Hipster admits it is “exhausting” being a tool 24/7

Every now and then a new fad will infect society and be scoffed at by decent people, until it fades away into the abyss, where it belongs. With the continuous rise of social media...
Man reading book

Man who only ever reads Jeremy Clarkson books outraged about Jane Austen appearing on...

A Rochdale man who only ever reads books written by Jeremy Clarkson has voiced his anger about Jane Austen appearing on the new £10 note.38 year old John Bull said, "It's a sign that...
Young man hospital bed

Man still wearing 2011 Glastonbury Festival wristband to be euthanised by friends

A man who still wears his wristband from the 2011 Glastonbury Festival is to be euthanised later today, friends have confirmed.Martin Jones, a 27 year-old sales manager from Rochdale, has continued to wear the...

Ugly scenes at Rochdale Waitrose as supplies of Chateau Lafite de Rothschild 2009 run...

There were frantic scenes of violence and looting yesterday morning after Waitrose ran out of the 2009 vintage of the Chateau Lafite de Rothschild.Customers were queuing around the corner from 6am after Waitrose announced...

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