Well I’ve never caught anything off my kids before, Facebook mum lies

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Before 2020, Rochdale mum Di Coughlan had rarely posted anything other than pictures of her adorable children and grimacing husband.  That all changed a couple of months ago, when a new profile...

Rochdale man to drink 100 pints to help the N.H.S.

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Rochdale resident Jim Tossking has announced that he hopes to raise £25m for the N.H.S. by supping 100 pints of bitter. A regular at Rochdale's famous Rat and Pudding pub, Jim is known to locals...

Man who’s spent last 4 years banging on about Blitz Spirit buys 70 bottles...

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A Rochdale resident who regularly invokes the Blitz Spirit has been out an panic bought 70 bottles of hand sanitizer today. Bill Board regularly greets minor annoyances such as train delays and getting...

Couple sentenced to five years in soft play centre for having unprotected sex

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A Yorkshire couple have received a five year suspended sentence for having unprotected sex. The sentence, which has been suspended for two years, is the 657,077th to be handed down to couples for...

Smug Husband packs Christmas shop into fridge

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A smug father of two from Bolton has taken the plaudits of his close friends and family as he managed to pack away all the Christmas shop into the family medium sized...
Christmas Morning

Man thanked for countless gifts he had no knowledge of purchasing

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A man has been repeatedly thanked and kissed by family and friends for Christmas presents he was unaware of purchasing, despite paying for every single one of them in full. The torrent of gratitude began...
Angry Man Christmas

Rochdale man disappointed he hasn’t been arrested for wishing people Merry Christmas

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A Rochdale man has been telling us that he is furious that he hasn't yet been arrested for wishing people a Merry Christmas. Bill Board, who has been to church twice in 30...
Homeless man

Homeless looking forward to making lots of new friends

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The homeless are celebrating the Conservative victory as they are looking forward to making lots of new friends. We spoke to Brian Thompson, a Big Issue seller from Birmingham city centre who agreed. "It'll be...

Man that failed GCSE Science now an expert in pediatrics

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A Rochdale man who failed GCSE Science has revealed he's an expert on pediatrics and specializes in treatments for Pneumonia. Bill Board loudly announced his expertise to surprised family members this morning...
Angry Man

Satirists give masterclass in social media relations.

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It seems that our writers are on form today.  One of our articles has apparently upset a section of our readers more than usual, to the point that one "Expert", when challenged, felt capable...

Rochdale woman drinks Gin Advent Calendar on Saturday night

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A Rochdale woman has woken today and realised that she spent last night drinking all the Gin in her Fever-Tree Ultimate Gin Advent Calendar. Orla Board told us, "It was delivered on Friday...

Terror as trick or treaters turn out to be political canvassers

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A Rochdale man has today been speaking about his ordeal at the hands to some political canvassers he mistook for trick or treaters.  Bill Board told us, "Me and my wife really enjoy...
Man Reading Menu

Man pretending to understand the wine list

A man is trying his very hardest to look like he understands the wine list in a restaurant. Steve Dickinson was handed the wine list by a waiter because...

One dead and two critical after fight over last packet of burger buns

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At approximately one o'clock this afternoon emergency services were dispatched to the Cooperative convenience store in Middleton. The initial response was to investigate a report anti social behaviour. Reports since indicate that fighting had broken...

Psychic wins EuroMillions for sixth week running

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A Rochdale based psychic has won the Euromillions lottery for the sixth week running. In an interview conducted 7 weeks ago Psychic Islet told us, "I've always been able...

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