Parents of nativity play’s King Herod unsure what this says about their parenting

A Rochdale teacher has been telling the Herald about how this year's school nativity has been dogged by endless controversy.The teacher, who asked not to be named, said "When we first announced the parts...

X distances itself from factor

For over a decade, the "talent" show that has built false hope in thousands and eroded the entertainment values of millions has been hit by wave after wave of controversy and suspicion.The...

“I did not have fap relations with my work computer” says Damien Green

The beleaguered Secretary of State is still denying accusations of downloading and viewing porn like a teen with two dicks on his office computer at work.The claims have been made by an ex...
Farage

Right wing nutjob calls right wing nutjob a right wing nutjob

Leading members of the Right Wing Nutjobs Association have been flinging accusations around willy-nilly to the amusement of 'leftie libtards' everywhere.Right wing nutjob Nigel Farage called Britain First a bunch of right wing...
Asda

Season 9 of The Walking Dead to be filmed in Burnley Asda

The Burnley Magic Lantern Club has announced that the next Season of The Walking Dead will be filmed in an Asda store in Burnley.Benny Arkwright, president of BMLC: "This will be the first non...
Lionel Richie

I’ve never danced on a ceiling, confession SHOCK

Rumours are rife about the quite tall, big-faced singing star after he has "fessed up" to not dancing on ceilings.The 80's porkie-pie uttering singer has told reporters "Look, i just made it up...

Burnley residents “Delighted” by the introduction of BBC2 in the area

BBC2 finally came to Burnley yesterday.The TV channel, which first aired to the british public in 1967, finally made its first transmition to the North England town yesterday.We asked the BBC to...

I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Hearse

The Rochdale Herald has learned that ITV plans to make drastic changes to the format of next year's 'I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here'.The number of actual celebrities appearing in the popular reality...

Man who once burnt a Pot Noodle looking forward to another night of shouting...

A man whose cooking skills don't extend beyond pressing the 'start' button on his microwave is looking forward to another night of shouting at 'Masterchef: The Professionals'.Gary Taylor, 36, intends to spend most of...
Mrs Brown's Boys

Mrs Brown’s Boys accused of hiding all their funny jokes in offshore accounts

Following recent reports that members of the cast of inexplicably popular BBC "comedy" Mrs Brown's Boys have funds stored in offshore tax havens, The Rochdale Herald has learned of more allegations in relation to...

Ann Widdecombe suspended over Strictly sex abuse claims

Privy Councillor and former Tory MP Ann Widdecombe has been suspended from the Conservative Party after shocking claims of historical abuse and inappropriate conduct were made last night.Miss Widdecombe was a contestant in...

Sex slurs cooking at Great British Bake-off

Channel four’s blue-eyed baker boy Paul Hollywood is reportedly reviewing his role on the hugely popular Great British Bake-Off because of the ever-widening scourge of sex allegations aimed at public figures, The Rochdale Herald...

‘On The Buses’ Star In 70’s Sex Shocker

In light of the recent revelations surrounding the scandalous sexual exploits of certain Hollywood actors and some of our own MP’s, one of Britain’s most well-loved comedy stars has come out with his own...

BBC at a loss to explain low ratings for “Bantmeister” Grimshaw

BBC bosses are completely at a loss to explain why Nick Grimshaw's BBC Radio 1 breakfast show has suffered its biggest drop in ratings since RAJAR began collecting data in 1992.Grimshaw, who has...

Simon Cowell’s stairs win Brit Award for outstanding contribution to music industry

Simon Cowell’s stairs have received a Brit Award for their outstanding contribution to the music industry after the reality TV star was found unconscious at the bottom of them, it has been announced.Judd Jim...

Google crashes as hipsters race to be “lifelong influenced” by Fats Domino

The death of the latest life-long influence of people too painfully cool for words, Fats Domino, has caused a Google Crash despite everyone thinking he was already dead.The desperate search for the "Did...

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