Magic Circle Trigger Terror Alert
Amid growing concern and fears for public safety, illusionist extremists The Magic Circle have been deemed a threat to security and democracy.
The so-called magicians...
Man dry retches vital organs up after remote batteries die during episode of The...
Keith Lambert sadly passed yesterday evening, after an horrific coughing fit which was brought on by the prospect of enduring a full hour of...
Celebrity Big Brother get Saw makeover
As the launch of the zillionth series of Celebrity Big Brother plans to get underway in just a few hours, The Rochdale Herald can...
Burnley Piss Artist awarded lucrative Arts Council Grant
George Barns (56), life-long Burnley resident, and winner of the coveted Piss Artist of The Year Trophy, has been awarded a lucrative Arts Council...
Ant in rehab after Dec shoots him in the eye with paintball gun
The North East was rocked today as Ant revealed he has been shot in the eye by long time friend and co-presenter Dec.
I’m A Celebrity host seen tampering with a parachute following announcement that K***e H*****s...
Following the shock decision to give Ms Hopkins, who has been sacked from numerous broadcasting jobs because of her wordhole, a spot on one...
Peter Pan of Pop Peeves Proud Populace
Cliff Richards recently learned that South Yorkshire Police will not be pursuing historic sexual abuse claims against him, but he hasn't escaped the wrath...
Tragedy strikes as Dogs Die in Hot Cars die in hot car
The late 1990's Scottish Indy Rock community is in mourning today after hearing the news that the ironically named band Dogs Die in Hot...
Streisand Needs To Pronounce Her Name Properly, Says Siri
Barbara Streizzand has used her fame as a has been screecher and ex-movie star to get Apple to alter the way Siri pronounces...
Yes Prime Minister explains the Trident Vote
Sir Humphrey: With Trident we could obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe. Jim Hacker: I don't want to obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe.
Sir Humphrey:...
Songwriter reveals “Always something there to remind me” was written about Herpes
The Burt Bacharach song, "Always something there to remind me" was written about Herpes. Or that's according to a new documentary to be screened...
Ed Sheeran receives MBE for services to blandness
Ed Sheeran was clearly chuffed to receive his MBE for services to blandness, remarking, "I really don't know what to say, but it's a great...
Candice wins Great British Pout Off 2016
Candice from Bedfordshire has won The Great British Pout Off after ten gruelling weeks of televised puckering.
Journalist who faked own death to replace Andrew Lincoln on The Walking Dead
Russian journalist, Arkady Babchenko, who was believed to have been murdered has turned up alive and announced he will be replacing Andrew Lincoln in, The...
Big Brother viewers in shock that vapid celebrities are vapid
Viewers of one of Channel 5's only TV shows with an audience, Celebrity Big Brother, are in shock today after it came to light...
Britain First Dates
After the success of its restaurant based dating show, Channel 4 are set to do a one-off Xmas special to coincide with Paul Golding...

















































