?Miranda Hart falls over for the last time
During a performance in Derbyshire last night Miranda Hart fell over and no one laughed.
"It just wasn't funny" said super fan Ewan King who...
Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.
US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who.
In a series of tweets at 3am this...
Bake Off Champion Candice announces conversion to Islam
Candice Clay, winner of the 2016 Great British Bake off, has sensationally announced She is converting to Islam.
Man who can tie his own shoelaces favourite to win Burnley’s Got Talent
Headlining the, new, ITV Spring schedule is the hit series, Burnley's Got Talent, hosted by one of the Ant and Dec twins.
Described by the...
Burnley Piss Artist awarded lucrative Arts Council Grant
George Barns (56), life-long Burnley resident, and winner of the coveted Piss Artist of The Year Trophy, has been awarded a lucrative Arts Council...
Complete sadist buys 2 year old nephew a keyboard for Christmas
A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas.
Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was...
Radiohead Gig Attracts Record Number Of Twats
Research has shown that the Old Trafford gig on July 4th by Radiohead attracted more wankers than any previous gig.
It is estimated that,...
Donald Trump Twitter Account wins Nobel Prize for fiction
The American character actor, author and comedian behind the Twitter Account, @realdonaldtrump, has scooped the Nobel Prize award for the best work of fiction...
GBBO causes football fracas
It has been revealed that last night's violence at the London stadium was caused when West Ham fans chanted the name of the Bake...
Mr Tumble denounces Theresa May and says not in our name.
Leading clowns have issued a joint statement confirming that Theresa May's latest attacks on migrants and the NHS are not part of traditional clown...
Michael Barrymore to present I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here
Michael Barrymore is to present the next series of, "I'm a celebrity, get me out of here".
The new series will see contestants head to...
Doctor Who goes back to Gallifrey after announcing ‘I give up’
The protector of earth with more faces than Big Ben made the announcement on The One Show on Friday.
Reflecting on the past 50 year of...
Tolkein With Tits set to dominate office conversations as Game of Thrones returns
As the umpteenth series of the godawful fantasy franchise "Game of Thrones" is due to air on Murdoch-vision this week, those with more refined...
Britain First Dates
After the success of its restaurant based dating show, Channel 4 are set to do a one-off Xmas special to coincide with Paul Golding...
BBC confirm David Icke to host next series of Saturday Kitchen
There was good news for truth seekers, Illuminati exposers and the generally paranoid today, as the BBC confirmed the Son of God David Icke...
BBC’s Sooty and Sweep Caught “off-air” in Soo Scandal
The ongoing horror of the BBC's handling of the Soo the Panda sexing-up scandal took another dramatic twist last night as footage emerged of...

















































