Stevie Wonder just chooses to be blind, says Kanye West

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Batshit crazy US rapper Kanye West has said that the Stevie Wonder’s blindness may be a “choice.”
Darth Vader

Ken Loach to direct next Star Wars film ‘Empire on Strike’ as gritty Northern...

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Star Wars fans have been shocked by Disney's announcement that Star Wars episode IX will be directed by Ken Loach, who plans to pivot...
Goldie

Who the fuck is Goldie, asks Banksy

2
The deliberately modest and ultra secretive celebrity, Goldie, yesterday potentially revealed  the identity of serial graffiti artist and liberal metropolitan elite caricature, Banksy, in...

Missile strike in Syria; mass outpouring of grief from OneDirection fans

Following the disastrous US missile strike in Syria yesterday which claimed the lives of 57 civilians including 11 children, teenagers and young adults around...

Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake

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Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.

Clive Dunn in Nazi uniform outrage

30
Dad's Army Star Clive Dunn has apologised after being pictured wearing a Nazi uniform. The Sun on Sunday published pictures of the celebrity actor and...

Enemy of the people: Fury as flamboyant FAKE judge overhead saying he voted ‘remain’

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'Judge' Rinder, or Mr. Rinder, to use his actual LEGAL title has angered Brexiters after he was overhead saying that he was a 'remainer'...
Chris Grayling

Chris Grayling wins Turner Prize for dystopian work “Railway Timetable in May”

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The Turner Prize committee has announced that this year's prize will be awarded to Chris Grayling for his dystopian work, "Railway Timetable in May". A...
Leonard Cohen

Leonard Cohen ready to die because 2016 is a total wanksplat

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82 year old legend, and the only man currently able to wear a Fedora without looking like an absolute twat, Leonard Cohen has announced...
Telly Tubbies

Tinky Winky to return half of salary after identifying as a woman

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BBC bosses have demanded that Teletubbies star Tinky Winky hand back half the wages ever paid over the course of the show after she...
ALBERT

V&A apologises for asking man who whipped his Albert out to cover up

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The Victoria and Albert Museum has apologised after a man said he was asked to "cover up" while whipping his cock out for a...
Bill and Ben

Boris Johnson confirmed to star in remake of Bill and Ben

Odd hairstyle, dependent upon Weed, strange manner of attire, frankly incomprehensible language - and you can see who's pulling the strings. Boris Johnson was born to...

BBC at a loss to explain low ratings for “Bantmeister” Grimshaw

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BBC bosses are completely at a loss to explain why Nick Grimshaw's BBC Radio 1 breakfast show has suffered its biggest drop in ratings...

Oscar winning director Jonathan Demme dies aged 73

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Oscar winning director Jonathan Demme has died aged 73. Filmmaker Jonathan Demme, whose Oscar-winning thriller "The Silence of the Lambs" terrified audiences and introduced...

Yes Prime Minister explains the Trident Vote

Sir Humphrey: With Trident we could obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe. Jim Hacker: I don't want to obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe.  Sir Humphrey:...
Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey records shock cover of Dead Kennedy’s ‘Nazi Punks Fuck Off’ in support...

1
Born again Christian pop singer and self styled "voice of the MTV generation" Mariah Carey, has sent shock waves through tin pan alley with...

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