BBC bans racist song White Christmas

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The BBC working on advice from Institute for Cultural Correctness has announced that the song, White Christmas is to be banned. Spokeswoman for the perpetually...

Tom Hiddleston does a runner.

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Tom Hiddleston, the one and only attractive ginger man in the world, has scarpered after news broke today that his relationship with Taylor Swift...

Corbyn criticised over links to NWA

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Controversial Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been heavily criticised for his links to rap group NWA. A picture of Jeremy "terrorists are my mates" Corbyn sipping gin and juice with rapper Easy E has been largely shared across social media.

The Verve say lack of racism due to drugs not working

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Indie stalwarts, The Verve have revealed that the in inspiration for their hit song, The Drugs Don't Work, was their inability to be racist. The...
Meal or No Meal

Noel Edmonds widely criticised for presenting North Korean game show Meal or No Meal

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Noel Edmonds has denied allegations that he is due to present a North Korean take on Deal or no Deal called, Meal or no...

Mary Berry to retire from television

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With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement...

Donald Trump Twitter Account wins Nobel Prize for fiction

The American character actor, author and comedian behind the Twitter Account, @realdonaldtrump, has scooped the Nobel Prize award for the best work of fiction...
Phil Collins

Phil Collins says 80s were his Coldplay years

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Phil Collins has been telling the Saga trade magazine, Zimmer how he sees the 1980's as his Coldplay years. Collins told the magazine, "Look, when...
Boris Johnson wins Hunted

Boris Johnson evades detection to win 2020 season of Hunted

Using an impressive combination of stealth, sneakiness and bare-faced cheek, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has trounced both his opponents and his pursuers to claim...

I wish it could be Brexit everyday

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When the pounds begins to fall and economic growth begins to stall It puts a great big smile on a remainer’s face If you dive...
Tardis

Parallel dimension parking ‘trickier than it looks’ says new Doctor Who

In a shocking confirmation of what arseholes up and down the country have been saying for hours, the new Doctor has fucked it already...

Hollywood shocked as no Fast & Furious movie released this week after star’s arrest

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Hollywood bigwigs and film goers alike were left reeling by the news that the seemingly endless Fast and Furious franchise does not have a...
Lionel Richie

I’ve never danced on a ceiling, confession SHOCK

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Rumours are rife about the quite tall, big-faced singing star after he has "fessed up" to not dancing on ceilings. The 80's porkie-pie uttering...

Trump appoints Mark E Smith as musical ambassador to Europe. Uh.

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US president Donald Trump has sent shockwaves through "tin pan ally" by appointing Fall front man and legendary curmudgeon Mark E Smith as his...
Crocodile does bushtucker trial on I'm a Celebrity

East goes west in latest Celebrity Bushtucker Trial

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"I'm pleased to have played my part though I won't be joining camp for dinner. I'm stuffed."

Theresa May to appear from Pyramid in Glastonbury

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Conservative leader to introduce those monks from Doctor Who on the main stage as Michael Eavis pours away his cider and looks accusingly at...

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