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Captain No


Donald Trump costumes selling out faster than Kim Jong Un disguises this Halloween

Once again the time of year when all the ghouls and monsters come out to play is upon us. But enough about the tete-a-tete...

Vegan banned from Vegetarian Club when she says quinoa “tastes like chicken”

Food plays a huge part in our lives, many of us enjoying it almost every day. Ever since rationing was no longer necessary in the...

Government vow to provide every child with prayer mat by 2020 to promote multi-culturalism.

The thorny issue of the integration into society of immigrants, particularly Muslims, has been strained of late. Now the UK government has come up...
Royal Mail

Royal Mail pledge to maintain the usual high levels of disappointing service this Christmas

As the services for various popular companies comes into question, with Uber and Ryanair being prime examples, Royal Mail has promised not to let...

Hipster admits it is “exhausting” being a tool 24/7

Every now and then a new fad will infect society and be scoffed at by decent people, until it fades away into the abyss,...

Michael Gove says Brexit is “like a box of chocolates…”

The Brexit negotiations have been tentative, at best, with British MPs doing their darndest not to get absolutely battered in the process. Unfortunately, Britain’s...
Christiano Ronaldo

Just £300,000 a month can feed a footballer for a whole week. Please give...

It can be harrowing, truly tragic to see, to see a young, athletic, talented man to have to survive in squalid conditions, living on...
Trump Flag

Trump to introduce Hunger Games-style immigration policy

The matter of immigration has often been a contentious issue within politics, particularly American politics of late. During the campaign trail, Donald Trump promised...
Donald Trump Wig

‘News media so fake’ says perma-tanned, toupee-wearing septuagenarian

The world's favourite orange leader has been ranting about his pet hate once again. The issue of so-called “Fake news” is now well within...

Survey reveals homeless choose to live on streets so they cannot appear on Come...

To many, the issue of homelessness invokes thoughts of a person falling on hard times, perhaps even drink, drugs, or criminality. Now, the latest...
Donald Trump

Trump to remove all right-wing terrorists from FBI watch-list in Operation Anti-Schindler

Donald Trump had been criticised by many for not denouncing the actions of the right-wing protests in Charlottesville. Then he declared there were people...
White Supremes

Tribute band ‘The White Supremes’ enjoying huge boost in bookings

The rising tensions in America have led to violent clashes in the streets of late, which has caused the tragic loss of life. The...

Trump is said to be fuhrerious over comparisons with Adolf Hitler

Today the Trump Administration has struck back over comments alluding to Donald Trump resembling something of a 21st Century Hitler. There has been outrage...
Golf Resort

Trump ends feud with North Korea after golf resort deal agreed

The world has been glued to the news whenever Donald Trump makes an announcement regarding the bitter rivalry with North Korea. As we have...
Science Class

DUP pushes to rename school classes in ‘Science’ as ‘Magic’

There has been a legion of support for the move though, as it would spark pupil’s interest in the subject of science again.
Sorry Trump

Donald Trump ‘very sorry’ for accidentally nuking North Carolina

As the world looked on with intrigue and anticipation at the spat between the USA and North Korea, a horrifying incident occurred. With the...

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