A man is trying his very hardest to look like he understands the wine list in a restaurant.

Steve Dickinson was handed the wine list by a waiter because he’s a bloke and is now doing his utmost to not look completely confused by it, like a girl would be.

He said “Well obviously we’ll need something robust to go with chips. Maybe something South Afrcian or something more mauvy from Guatemala.”

“Obviously I should chose the wine because men are born knowing stuff about wine and parking. It’s a genetic thing.”

Wife Barbara added “We go through this every time, he’s going to choose the third cheapest bottle of red.”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.