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Your Mum has a dildo

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Children all over the country are coming to terms with the horrifying reality that their Mums have at least one dildo.

UK Customs replace “Nothing to declare” signs with “Abandon All Hope...

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Following the news that Boris Johnson has been elected Prime Minister UK Customs officials have decided to replace all the 'Nothing to Declare' signs...

Many Muslims not rioting in streets

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The Rochdale Herald learned today that almost two billion Muslims around the world went about their daily business without perpetuating a single crime, let...

Ant McPartlin’s forehead to be used as theatre wheelchair ramp as...

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There was a much needed boost for disabled theatre lovers today, as a West End theatre confirmed they had secured the use of Ant...

Thirty nine bus seats arrested in counter-terrorism operation

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In what police are describing as a “significant” counter-terrorism operation, thirty nine bus seats were arrested today on suspicion of being involved in jihadist...

Owning an IKEA loyalty card doesn’t count as Swedish heritage, disappointed...

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Avid football fans across Scotland were left disappointed earlier today when it was confirmed that membership of IKEA's Family Card scheme does not count as Swedish heritage.  The news comes...

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