Rooney: taking are cuntry bak
As the second half of the Manchester derby got underway, reports were coming in that Wayne Rooney had joined Britain First.
During the halftime team...
Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW
A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Moron says something moronic
A moron has uttered a statement that is totally devoid of intelligence, it has emerged.
The exact words used in this situation concerned a...
FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia
FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in...
Moaning Mourinho In Lip Wobble Outburst
The future of games at Old Trafford are in doubt after Manchester United Manager Jose Mourinho demanded the removal of peas from referee's whistles...
Wales Seeks Independence as Gareth Bale Doubles Welsh GDP
Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.
Newcastle United fans looking forward to renewed access to match pies and beer
The Toon Army are rejoicing following the news that Sports Direct Entrepreneur Sweat Shop owner, Mike Ashley, is to sell the Magpies.
Realising that he...
EFL admits to buying its footballs from a petrol station on Rochdale
The English Football League has admitted buying its footballs from Denny’s Auto Diesel & Spar Mini-Mart on the Bury New Road in Rochdale.
The...
Does my bum look big on top of this broken ambulance?
Several women have taken to the top of ambulances in their latest quest for reassurance about their weight
Becky Donaldson, 23, is fairly confident she...
Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal
Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer.
Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...
Police and HMRC raid Arsenal after silver polish claim on VAT return
More tax scandal has hit the Premier League last night after police swooped on the Arsenal stadium after they tried to claim the VAT...
Rochdale footballer in record 198p transfer
Rochdale football star, Wayne "Chopper" Gascoigne has been transferred to Accrington Stanley for a record 198p (€1.77) and a box of steak and onion...
FA launch tactical nuclear strike at semi-final of Women’s Euro 2017
The Football Association has long been implacably opposed to the rise of the women’s game. When it first got popular, the FA acted swiftly...
Jose mourinho assures Spain ‘money was just resting in my account’
Jose Mourinho has sought to reassure the Spanish tax office that the £3m he is alleged to owe them in unpaid taxes has in...
BT and Sky TV will not allow Nuclear Winter Premiership break
Sky TV and BT TV have both announced that the current Premier League TV rights deal precludes top-tier football a break in the event...
Rochdale Reds watch Man Utd forge ahead with Brexit plan
Members of the Rochdale Reds Man Utd supporters association may ask the High Court to step in over Jose Mourinho's apparent Brexit plans.
United manager...



















































