Football

Proper footie with a round ball and none of that sissy body armour

FIFA poppy row escalates

0
British football fans have been advised that if they object to FIFA's stance on its national teams wearing poppies on armistice day, then they...

Does my bum look big on top of this broken ambulance?

0
Several women have taken to the top of ambulances in their latest quest for reassurance about their weight Becky Donaldson, 23, is fairly confident she...
Wayne Rooney

Rooney arrested crying into bottle of 20/20 wearing Man Utd pyjamas

0
My night of 20/20, Man Utd pyjamas and Steradent with mysterious brunette. Everton striker Wayne Rooney has been charged with drink-driving offences in the...
Bored Football Fan

Spurs reassure loyal fans with plan to be shit again by the weekend

0
Tottenham Hotspur, commonly referred to simply as Tottenham, Spurs, or a word that you really can’t use in an article these days for fear...

Mighty England’s thrilling World Cup opener – Yeah right!

0
England's opening match of the World Cup campaign was as dull as ditchwater proving that the news of Joe Hart's transfer from Man City...
Football

England team reveal plan to completely disappoint everyone is going smoothly

0
Gareth Southgate has revealed that his plan to completely disappoint loads of English people is going exactly according to plan. At a press conference Southgate...

EFL admits to buying its footballs from a petrol station on Rochdale

0
The English Football League has admitted buying its footballs from Denny’s Auto Diesel & Spar Mini-Mart on the Bury New Road in Rochdale. The...

The Beckhams ditch L.A for glorious Rochdale

0
Today the Herald can exclusively reveal the jaw dropping news that the world's biggest star, glamour model, fashion icon, tireless charity worker and one...

Euro 2020 tournament to be played on XBox, UEFA confirms

0
The European Football Championship 2020 is to be played on XBox, UEFA has told The Rochdale Herald. In the wake of the Coronavirus pandemic, European...

Lukaku leaves second best club in Liverpool for second best club in Manchester

9
Lukaku is thought to be worth approximately 50m but has signed for United with an additional premium unofficially known as the 'United surcharge'. Lukaku's...

Poppies outraged at being hijacked by intolerable, out of touch band of Nationalists.

0
The prima-donna XI, also known as the England National football team, have confirmed that they will take to the pitch against Germany this Friday,...

Queen gives blessing for Meghan to marry Prince Harry

0
The Queen has signalled her approval for Meghan Markle to marry Prince Harry Kane. Despite her recent wedding to that "Bastard" (sic) ginger grandson of...

Football team goes one point ahead in Premiership.

0
Fans of popular football team Chelsea Albion were agog with joy today when the team went one point ahead of arch rivals Liverpool Wanderers...

The Rochdale Herald’s Top Ten Tips for Real Supporters and True Football Fans

0
In honour of signing world famous football man Neville Southall to the Rochdale Herald, here are our top ten tips for real supporters and...
Football

Donald Trump congratulates Rochdale AFC on winning Superbowl

0
POTATUS, Donald Trump telephoned and congratulated Rochdale AFC on winning the Superbowl on Sunday night. Much to the surprise of club officials. A club spokesman...
Arsene Wenger

Wenger at wits end as he cannot figure out how to get sack from...

0
Arsene Wenger was left frustrated after the end of a tumultuous week which saw Arsenal lose twice against Manchester city and rounded off by...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts