ISIS

ISIS narrowly beats Halloween and Presidential election in annual scary competition

This year's annual scary competition is still a 3 horsemen of the apocalypse race in it's closing stages.

Aussies can stay in Scotland

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Gregg and Kathryn Brian and their son were given a last minute reprieve from being deported back to Australia from Scotland if Mrs Brian...

Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate

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In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...
Donald Genius Trump

Fat bottomed ape learns to mimic human sounds

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Washington DC - A seventy year primitive primate that can mimic human words such as hello, bigly, braggadocios, and covfefe is thought to be...
Dinosaur Meteor

Dinosaurs deny existence of meteorite impact assessment

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The dinosaurs today issued a statement in response to the challenge that they release their assessment on what would happen if the planet was...
Trump

Donald Trump is a hoax, says Global Warming

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Global Warming, the phenomenon by which mankind is fucking up the environment, has confirmed on Twitter today that Donald Trump is in fact a...

Senate approve plans for naughty corner in Oval Office

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A White House insider has revealed plans to redesign the Oval Office to help Donald Trump, cope with the rigours of his job. The actions...
Putin MAGA

Putin has confirmed he will run for second term as President of United States

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After his self proclaimed "success with that bloated orange puppet" Vladimir Putin has announced that he will seek to control him in a second...
Michael Gove

Gove calls for post-Brexit legalisation of cannibalism

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Former Tory minister and leading Brexit campaigner Michael Gove has called on the government to slash EU regulations on cannibalism which he claims have...

Salisbury poisoning suspect revealed to be elderly arcade owner from Scooby Doo

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A man who is suspected of poisoning Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal has had his real identity revealed by a group calling itself Mystery...

South African Scientist Discovers Free Non-Polluting Energy Source

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Imagine the scenario: you are in a pub, when a local starts spouting racist nonsense. You have an overwhelming desire to stand up and...

Specsavers Official Sponsors Of WWIII

Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company...
Donald Trump

Trump to remove all right-wing terrorists from FBI watch-list in Operation Anti-Schindler

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Donald Trump had been criticised by many for not denouncing the actions of the right-wing protests in Charlottesville. Then he declared there were people...

Hammond to Create National Hoard

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In advance of Brexit negotiations Phillip Hammond is to bury all of the country's wealth in a hole in the ground. The hole, believed to...
FBI Directors till Christmas

Only two FBI directors until Christmas

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Christmas is coming, the POTUS is getting fat. Please to put a penny in the old man's retirement fund. Following the latest Trumptastrophy in Alabama,...
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

9
US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...

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