Donald Genius Trump

The ‘J’ is for Genius, confirms Donald J Trump

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Washington - The actual real life President of the United States of America Donald J Trump has cleared up speculation over the weekend about...

Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake

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Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.

Just £3 a month will pay for cocaine and child prostitutes for an Oxfam...

A new fundraising campaign from Oxfam appealing to the better nature of child abusers is asking for just £3 a month to pay for...
Sergei Lavrov

Sergei Lavrov Trump’s ‘Top Choice’ for new FBI Director

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Sources within the Trump administration have downplayed rumours that Russian diplomat Sergei Lavrov is in the running to become the next Director of the...

Da Vinci’s ‘My Spunky Pantaloons’ sells for £45m

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A previously unknown Leonardo da Vinci work "My Spunky Pantaloons" has been bought bought by Charles Saatchi for £45m. The jizzy kecks will be...

Intrepid British journalists discover tribe of foreigners who don’t let each other die in...

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The British media world was stunned today by the discovery of a tribe of non-British humans who actually attempt to save each other after...

Denmark offers to buy America from Russia

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Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich...

Luftwaffe didn’t tell Hitler about every bomb dropped, just sayin, Spicer tells press corps

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Sean Spicer has put rumours to rest that Hawkish generals in the United States military are deploying military assets without Presidential authorisation. "Look I know...

US WWII veterans arrested after Trump bans anti-fascists

In extraordinary scenes the US Secret Service have rounded up and imprisoned several second world war veterans after Donald Trump announced the banning of...

Online petition to impeach Trump gets 6 billion signatures in 24 hours

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An online petition requesting that Donald Trump be removed from office has got 6 billion signatures from around the world within 24 hours of...
Donald Trump

Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration

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There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event. The demagogue was able to...

Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported

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America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.  "Ms...

CIA to dumb down intelligence briefings

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The U.S. Director of National Intelligence (DNI) Dan Coats, announced on Sunday that they will be cutting down the president’s daily intelligence briefings to a maximum...

China celebrates start of the year of the rat with a plague

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China is marking the start of the year of the rat with a global plague outbreak.  As spokesman told us, "We wanted a way of...

England cheated by playing better than us, says Steve Smith

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After England fought back to secure a well earned win against Australia yesterday, Australian batsman said that England "Cheated" by "Bowling really fast and...
Golden sceptre

Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration

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In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...

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