Anyone actively calling for a war to be automatically drafted to the front line

Anybody saying there should be a war may be required to put their money where their mouth is in future.  In a new bid to...

Leave campaigner forced to abandon argument after forgetting what Brexit means

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Panic today as vocal anti-EU campaigner, Dennis Pigwater, forgot a crucial piece of his argument during an online debate. Dennis, 58, from Rochdale, was engaged...
Steve Bannon

Crazy bastard calls crazy bastard a crazy bastard

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A crazy bastard who works in the White House has accused a former employee of being a crazy bastard. The crazy bastard apparently "disavowed' the...

Donald Trump to lift Muslim ban ‘with immediate effect’ after learning of Manchester protests

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The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US. Last night thousands of protesters...
Donald Trump

Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration

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There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event. The demagogue was able to...

Luftwaffe didn’t tell Hitler about every bomb dropped, just sayin, Spicer tells press corps

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Sean Spicer has put rumours to rest that Hawkish generals in the United States military are deploying military assets without Presidential authorisation. "Look I know...
Trump and Mike Pence

President Trump recorded offering Mike Pence presidency in exchange for Trump family pardon ticket

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Leaked recordings of President Trump phoning vice president Mike Pence from a golf course appear to reveal the sitting president has offered Pence the...

EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…

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Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...

Your 60 second news round-up

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Here's The Rochdale Herald's round-up of today's important news headlines: - UKIP leader's girlfriend is a nasty little racist - Nicola Sturgeon backs a second Scottish...

New EU rules send shock waves through the terraces

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New EU rules are set to send shock waves through the football terraces of the UK. According to sources close to the FA, the...

Trump’s spin doctor quits complaining of dizzy spells

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Donald Trump's chief spin doctor Tuesday quit his job in the White House complaining of "dizzy spells". Mike Dubke, who only took up the role...

Nuclear war could be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry

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A globally devastating nuclear war could prove to be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry, the UK's Secretary of State for International...
Man holding a gun

Mass shootings ‘fact of life’ says only country where mass shootings happen

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Ralph H. Ick, head of the Texas branch of the NRA made the shocking statement yesterday after seven children were slain and three were...
Assad

Assad regime toppled after receiving strongly worded letter from Jeremy Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn has issued a strongly worded letter to Bashar al-Assad today. It seems it's had some effect as the regime has been toppled. Jamal...

Clinton Email Cache Found in Historic Exeter Hotel

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The American election process was thrown into confusion yesterday when the FBI moved into the Royal Clarence Hotel, Exeter, in search of a hidden...
Donald Trump

White House desperately concealing news of Twitter character increase from Trump

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The twittersphere is in overdrive this morning with millions of users tweeting out their hope that the White House is able to conceal the...

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