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What’s Johnny Foreigner up to?

Man that spent last month saying all lives matter furious at 3 million Hong...

A Rochdale man that has just spent a month telling anyone within earshot or on the internet that all lives matter has said he's...
Donald Trump has a gold leaf living room yet tells the government he doesn't pay tax because you would waste it

Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...

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A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in...

Trump adds Germany to Travel Ban after hostages taken at Nakatomi Tower

Donald Trump has added the populations of Germany and Austria to his controversial travel ban after hearing reports that terrorists have taken hostages at the Nakatomi Tower in Los Angeles, again.

?Kim Jong Un invents universal cure

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The secretive state of North Korea has managed to cure most illnesses from the common cold to cancer, it has been revealed. Ishit Yu Not,...

First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California

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It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting. "Yeah, we're...

Gassing orphans is wrong says woman who prefers to starve them

Theresa May's regime has roundly condemned the Assad Regime's actions in Syria by saying it was wrong to use Sarin Gas on orphaned children. "It...
Donald Trump

Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...

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An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...

Absolute arsehole Winnie Mandela dies aged 81

An absolute arsehole has died in South Africa aged 81.

I don’t care what UK Ambassador thinks of me, says dickhead who won’t shut...

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A giant man dayglo baby who won't stop whining about somebody who said some mean things about him has declared on Twitter that he...

We always go on holiday to visit housing estates, say Russian poisoning suspects

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2 Russians who are suspected to have poisoned Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal have told Russia Today that they always go on holiday and...
Garda

Emergency services called after Bob Geldof disappears up his own arse

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Two fire engines along with police and ambulance crews were called to the centre of Dublin after reports came in that a man had...
Francis Underwood

Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President

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Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment. Whilst his Presidency...
Michael Flatley

Michael Flatley confirmed as world’s second biggest wanker

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Rhino horn collector and jig enthusiast Michael Flatley confirmed today that he is the World's second biggest wanker after announcing he will perform a jig at Trump's Inauguration Ball.
Illegal Immigrants boarding ship

New Technology Foils Illegal Immigrants

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In conjunction with the British Government-funded wall in Calais, British officials are working with maritime consultants on methods to physically prevent illegal immigrants from...
Man holding a gun

America in shock after a live streamed dispute is resolved without a single shot...

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Americans were rocked to the core today to find that it was possible to resolve a dispute without gunfire. Chuck Henderson, a 7-Eleven employee from...

National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting

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This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...

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