Secret Service distance themselves from Trump’s Twitter account
The Secret Service, the department responsible for the security of the US President, has taken steps to distance themselves from Donald Trump's Twitter account.
Too soon since last mass shooting and not long enough before next one to...
In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a bar in Ohio that has claimed the lives of at least 9 people The White...
Trump locked out of nuclear football after entering incorrect code three times and forgetting...
Apparently POTUS did get Ivanka to click on the “forgotten your password?” help icon on the device that destroys worlds and was offered a series of security questions in order to reset his password.
Trump travel ban extends to Narnia
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order adding Narnia to the travel ban and immediately excluding "followers of Aslan" from entering the...
Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump
Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's.
It is being reported around the world...
If it wasn’t for these pesky bone spurs I’d have stopped shooter myself, says...
Actual real-life President of the United States Donald Trump told a press conference earlier today that if it wasn't for the debilitating bone spurs...
Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own
This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.
This, apparently,...
The Australian Federal Opposition has called for a Royal Commission into Royal Commissions
In an extraordinary turn of events in Australia Opposition Immigration Minister Aidan Androyd has declared the "necessity for this Royal Commission."
"Well, I tried to...
UKIP corruption proves EU corruption say UKIP
Documents leaked to Sky News showing that, should results be confirmed, UKIP have been misappropriating EU cash prove that the EU is dodgy, claimed...
Trump attends Paris Armistice commemoration after hearing there is a golf course nearby
POTATUS has attended an Armistice commemoration in Paris a day after demonstrating the sort of spirit that has earned him the nickname, Cadet Bone...
Spain Says ‘Direct Rule Impossible’ after Entire Catalan Population Hides
Spanish Prime-Minister Marion Rajoy has tonight been unable to suspend the Catalonian Parliament after their leader along with the rest of the population went...
Black Cops to shoot unarmed white civilians in controversial Charlotte anti-racism plan
Charlotte Police Department have unveiled a controversial yet utterly foolproof plan to combat claims that their police force is institutionally racist.
They're going to let...
Bill Clinton Finally “Boss of Me” after Hillary Loss
Bill Clinton will finally get to be “the Boss of Me” after Hilary’s stunning loss in the US Presidential Election.
Climate Change is a hoax insists Texan on a raft
Despite his trailer having flooded and all his possessions being lost to water damage, defiant Texan, Ray "Buckeye" McCready is travelling around his home state on a makeshift raft to convince others that climate change is a hoax.
Russia and China back UN call for Kim Jong Un to be sent to...
The UN has finally received the backing of both Mummy and Daddy as Russia and China backed the call for serious punishment to be...
Donald Trump arrives in Germany and says ‘Ich bin ein Binliner’ Berlin agrees
President Donald Trump landed in Germany Sunday morning to kick off the first leg of his 12-day trip to Europe.
Trump held a surprise press...



















































