Trump tells California to use prostitute piss to put fires out

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POTATUS has offered to use Government money to harvest the piss of some Russian prostitutes to douse the fires in California. A spokesman said, "POTATUS...

We tried democracy and Franco-ly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters

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The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
French Military

French Head of Military resigns after Macron cuts £1bn from White Flag Budget

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General Pierre de Villiers today sensationally quit as Head of the French Military in a row over cuts to the French White Flag budget. General...

Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service

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The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
Smiling Liam Fox

Liam Fox Announces Trade Deal With Iraq

Liam Fox, Secretary of State For International Trade, has followed up the success of his charm offensive with Duterte, the leader of the Philippines...

Trump apology shocks nation   

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In a move that has shocked the world the shredded wheat headed presidential candidate Donald Trump has actually apologised for something. His apology was aimed...

Farage takes on Eurovision

In a shock move today, the rubber faced, racist, people's champion Nigel Farage has announced his intentions to represent Great Britain in next year's...

KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump

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In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Justice

Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’

Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...

Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP

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Revelations of comments  made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...

Satire Is Officially Obsolete, Satirists Announce

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Satirists have officially announced that satire is no more, it has been confirmed. A spokesman on behalf of satirists, announced, "As of January 31st 2017,...

Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake

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Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.
Guns

Why does this keep happening, asks country selling guns without doing background checks

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A country who sells weapons over the counter to anybody who wants one is stumped at how it can be home to so many...
Santa

The ‘Santa Clause’ prevents Article 50 from being triggered experts warn

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In a massive blow to the government, German lawyer Rudolph Shnitz has highlighted a clause in section 4 of article 38 dubbed 'The Santa...
Hugh Hefner

Playboy Bunnies surprised to find Hugh Hefner stiffer than usual

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Notorious Bachelor and soft core pornographer Hugh Hefner was pronounced dead this morning at his home, the Playboy Mansion, Los Angeles. Early reports indicate that...

Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy wins European Thundercunt of the year award

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The Spanish Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy, was thrilled to learn last night that he has won the coveted European Thundercunt of the Year Award...

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