Trump asks to buy Greenland after hearing it is actually white
President Trump has indicated his strong interest in buying Greenland from the Danish. The move has shocked US analysts as it comes just weeks...
There was nothing to tip us off about that bloke who bought 33 guns...
The FBI have reiterated that there were absolutely no clues that a bloke who bought thirty three semi-automatic rifles in one year might have...
Trump Invades Iraq
President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair.
The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...
We always go on holiday to visit housing estates, say Russian poisoning suspects
2 Russians who are suspected to have poisoned Sergei Skripal and Yulia Skripal have told Russia Today that they always go on holiday and...
Canada and Mexico to build border walls if World Bank will fund a lid
The governments of Canada and Mexico reached an historic agreement today to build 50 foot tall walls along their borders with the US on the proviso that the World Bank lends them the money for a lid.
Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court
Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault.
Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for...
Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service
The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
New EU regulations will require all new houses to have Toulouse
Flush from the success of Brexit, the EU Commission has been swift to demonstrate what the future looks like without a good hard Brit. ...
America To Be Renamed Trumptopia
Donald Trump has announced a new step in his plan to make America great again - he's renaming it after himself.
In a press conference,...
Oh,For f*ck’s Sake Most Commonly Used Phrase Of 2016
Oh, for fuck’s sake said everyone this morning, following reports of more people dying at the hands of total arseholes.
After news broke of the...
Kremlins useful idiots deny that they’re Kremlins useful idiots
A bunch of useful idiots have denied that they are useful idiots today after a series of e-mails seemed to prove that they were...
WW3 inevitable as Boris Johnson prank calls Putin and leaves burning bag of dog...
Hetrosexual Russian leader, Vladimir Putin immediately responded by sending a fleet of Grade 50 ballistic war ships to British waters.
He then instructed 4 million...
Seriously?
I mean, just....Fuck, Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.
A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
RSPCA desperately seeking forever homes for 45 bunnies rescued from ‘Bunny Farm’ in California
A RSPCA spokesman in Nantwich is urgently looking for 45 'new residents rescued from what he described as 'the biggest bunny farm they had...
Donald Trump to lift Muslim ban ‘with immediate effect’ after learning of Manchester protests
The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US.
Last night thousands of protesters...
Not enough guns in America according to experts
In the aftermath of the shocking shooting of children and teachers in a Florida High School, Americans have been quick to point out there...
