Britain to join new ‘European Federation’ after Brexit
EXCLUSIVE: With Britain poised to trigger Article 50 and put the wheels irreversibly in motion to finally leave the European Union, a leaked home office...
Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration
In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...
Trump rally cancels book burning as supporters have no books to burn
Plans for an official book burning at a Trump rally in Bumshart California had to be scrapped yesterday after it emerged Trump supporters in...
Only 350 High School Shootings left until Christmas
Children across the United States of America were very excited to learn this morning that it's now officially only 350 school shootings until Christmas.
With...
UKIP leader calls for Theresa May to resign
UKIP's leader, Vladimir Putin has called on Theresa May to call a General Election to ensure a Government is elected that will push Brexit...
Trump threatens N. Korea with Fire, Fury, Trouser Snake and six other American Gladiators
Following Kim Jong Il's threat to carry out missile strike on US territory, President Trump counters with threat of onslaught by mid-90s kick-ass TV...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
Sir Richard Branson arrested for looting in British Virgin Islands
Billionaire adventurer and entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson is currently in custody in the British Virgin Islands after being arrested for looting, according to reports....
Haiti sends aid to holidaymakers whose trip to Disneyworld was cancelled
Heartwarming news reaching us from Haiti today after they'd heard that Amanda Bangor and her family from Norden had their trip to Disneyland cancelled because of...
You had some very fine people on both sides, Trump tells D-Day veterans
Donald Trump has told D-Day veterans that there were very fine people on both sides of the battles to control the Normandy Beaches during...
NRA claims that fewer elephants would be shot by hunters if more of them...
The National Rifle Association has today put out a statement claiming that fewer African elephants would fall victim to big game hunters if they...
Idiot dies in Karmic Avalanche
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Teruel in Aragon, Spain, yesterday.
Victor Barrio (29), having spent the last 9...
Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs
A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs.
The man, now in his seventies, is said...
Bear Cancels Plan To Shit In Woods
Bryan Pickle, an unemployed brown bear, interrupted a meeting at The National History Museum this morning to make a surprise announcement.
"I've been thinking about...
Border Free Travel sounds like a good idea, says Brexit voter who queued four...
A Brexit voter who spent four hours queueing in passport control has suggested that maybe border free travel in Europe is a good thing.
Jo...
All soldiers know what they are signing up for, that’s why I dodged the...
The West Wing has been forced to defend President Trump against malicious disinformation about his health and state of mind for months.
Allegations about his...
