Boris meant Saudis are awesome says Defence Secretary Michael Fallon
Boris Johnson’s words on Saudi Arabia and other Middle East powers were misreported, according to a clearly desperate Defence Secretary Sir Mr Michael of Fallon.
Russian presidential candidates have families safely returned in wake of Putin’s re-election
The families of all seven Russian Presidential candidates have been returned safely after the totally unexpected landslide victory for Vladimir Putin.
Today Vladimir Putin has...
NASA announce Kellyanne Conway is not of this world
NASA has announced it will hold a press conference later this week to reveal new discoveries "of significant importance, "beyond our solar system".
The agency...
I’m nothing like Steve Bannon – says Darth Vader
Darth Vader took to Twitter today to distance himself from "that evil bastard" Steve Bannon after Bannon compared himself to Darth Vader, Thomas Cromwell, Dick Cheney and Satan.
Producers of Rambo 3 sue Donald Trump for plagiarising film plot for Afghanistan strategy
The producers of Rambo 3 are allegedly suing Donald Trump for copyright infringements based on his Afghanistan strategy.
Mr Trump was initially very cold on...
Trump in hiding as NRA call for curb ‘on rapid fire tools’
DONALD TRUMP is believed to be in hiding tonight after the National Rifle Association called for a clamp-down on “rapid fire tools”.
This has been...
Jesus definitely said ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me, so I can...
The US Vice President, Mike Pence, has told reporters that the Trump administration's policy of keeping child migrants in cages is definitely consistent with the...
Scandal as Trump attempts to circumvent physical laws
In his bid to become master of the universe, Donald Trump has postulated a new set of axioms about the physical universe as we...
RAF successfully destroy evidence of UK chemicals exports
Targeted strikes destroy invoices, with only minor collateral damage to Syrian accountants.
RAF Bomber Command confirmed the series of raids sanctioned by the May government...
Iain Duncan Smith appointed to North Korean Cabinet
Within the last hour, the North Korean Central News Agency has confirmed the appointment of Iain Duncan Smith as its new ‘Secretary for the...
Seriously?
I mean, just....Fuck, Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.
A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
Thanks Mahmut. Inventor of Donner Kebab Dies Aged 87
The man who invented the doner kebab has died. Mahmut Aygun, was suffering from cancer and died in Berlin at the age of 87.
Known as...
Trump appoints David Duke to head Black Lives Don’t Matter initiative
Dr David Duke, former Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan, Senate hopeful and all American Nazi Screwball, has accepted President Elect Donald Trump’s offer of a key advisory role in his new government.
Trump celebrates success of travel ban as many developed countries join voluntarily
President Donald Trump, perhaps the funniest American president since the last republican one, has hailed the success of his travel ban after many developed...
Get your hands out of Ivanka’s knickers, White House orders media
White House press secretary Sean "Ginger" Spicer has issued an ultimatum to the US media in the wake of the growing row over the...
Isis Claims Responsibility for Education Fair Funding Formula Terror
In a shock announcement this morning, that surprised no one, a spokes-stool for Isis (other names are available) claimed credit for the proposed funding...
