We tried democracy and frankly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters
The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
Disney Confirm Little Mermaid Killed By North Korean Missile Launch
Within the past few minutes the Walt Disney Company has released a statement confirming that Ariel, the Little Mermaid, was killed during Wednesday's North...
Boris meant Saudis are awesome says Defence Secretary Michael Fallon
Boris Johnson’s words on Saudi Arabia and other Middle East powers were misreported, according to a clearly desperate Defence Secretary Sir Mr Michael of Fallon.
Chemical Attack was fake news says Asshat
Bashir Assad has denied an attack on Khan Sheikhoun ever took place.
“The attack was a fiction of the Western press,” said the Syrian leader...
President Trump to wear eclipse glasses when viewing the news to protect his thin...
It was announced today via Twitter that President Trump will now wear eclipse glasses when viewing the news in order to protect his thin...
Trump announces plan for sea wall to keep out foreign storms
Donald Trump has unveiled his latest scheme to “make America great again” - a huge wall along the entire coast to keep out hurricanes,...
Dyson vacuum cleaners issue blanket denial of Trump wiretap allegations
UK based vacuum cleaner and household electronics company Dyson has no involvement whatsoever in spying on US President Donald Trump, sources close to the...
Trump aide sacked after misspelt memo advised him to secure the “rapist vote”
It emerged that a senior aide has been dismissed after a spelling mistake caused a schism in Presidential campaign.
Texas commemorates first mass shooting by giving students guns to take to school
To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the world's inaugural mass shooting event at the University of Austin in Texas law makers have passed a...
Why does this keep happening, asks country selling guns without doing background checks
A country who sells weapons over the counter to anybody who wants one is stumped at how it can be home to so many...
Coal prices spike on news of Katy Hopkins’ incineration
International coal prices have jumped to $120 a tonne, their highest since 2011, following news that a British court has sentenced Daily Mail columnist...
Palestinians Recognise Scunthorpe as Capital of US, Answering Question ‘Who put the ‘Trump’ in...
Following the United States decision to recognise Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, the Palestinian authorities have entered into the spirit of things and...
Mass shootings are an unsolvable problem says country with a mass shootings problem
A country that has a really serious problem with deranged lunatics buying really big guns and shooting dozens of strangers has publicly said it...
Quackpot fundamentalist and friend of dictators finally canonised by paedophiles
Mother Theresa of Calcutta became Saint Theresa yesterday in a small ceremony in the Vatican. Saint Theresa, who passed through Rochdale on her way...
President Trump In Deep Water Over Puerto Rico
President Donald Trump has found himself in the middle of a storm of controversy recently following his comments about Puerto Rico.
At a press...
M.A.S.H. theme “Suicide is Painless” to be covered in gangnam style by Kim Jong-un
State media sources inside The Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea shouted the news this morning that Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un is to release...




















































