Deadly brain eating microbe starves to death in Texas water supply
Brain eating microbes in the water supply in Lake Jackson Texas have been found either starved to death or suffering from extreme malnutrition.
Tests have...
I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
Nuclear Football replaced with state of the art 1979 Speak and Spell
The Secret Service and senior members of the National Security Council have taken drastic steps to toughen US Nuclear launch protocols during Donald Trump's presidency by replacing the Nuclear Football with 1979 Speak and Spell.
Russia accuse Boris of hysterical Russophobia
Russia has responded to Boris Johnson's accusations of war crimes by counter-accusing the British government and Boris in particular of 'Russophobia.'
Despite what one may...
Trump makes it compulsory to carry guns in US
President Donald Trump has apparently just signed a new executive order making it compulsory for American citizens to carry guns about them at all...
Oh for F**k’s sake – say world leaders following Trump nomination
Leaders around the world let out a simultaneous sigh of despair last night as the Republican Party confirmed Donald Trump's presidential nomination.
In yet another...
Meghan Markle’s mum ecstatic with trip to Paris courtesy of Duke of Edinburgh
Meghan Markle's mum, Doria Ragland is reported to be over the moon with the trip to Paris that the Duke of Edinburgh has given...
Mexican earthquake disaster: whose faultline is it anyway?
At the Herald, we do not make fun of the suffering of innocent disaster victims, but we do point fingers. Less Mock the Weak,...
Terrifying clown in next Stephen King film to be perma-tanned and have a combover
Stephen King took to twitter today to reveal a juicy nugget regarding his next movie project, ’Idiot’, a sequel to ‘It’, will feature a...
Trump appoints Rochdale Herald editor chief of intelligence
More details have been emerging of the structure of the Trump elected new administration which is taking shape.
Amid the circulating rumours of secret talks...
When the world Trumps, you better dodge that draft
Look at him. He’s the lad you thought was a prick at school but you still went round his house because he had a decent back garden for you to leck footy in. Except he was shit at it, and had right bad hayfever.
I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump
Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.
Britain threatens Russia with visit from Boris Johnson
There were extraordinary scenes in Parliament today as Boris Johnson spoke about the suspected poisoning of Sergei Skripal.
Mr Johnson said, "If Russian involvement is...
Pakistani woman sentenced to death for insulting Harry Potter
A woman in Pakistan has been sentenced to death for insulting the fictional character, Harry Potter.
The woman's lawyer told us, "This woman deeply insulted Harry Potter...
German Police deploy hydration wagons to cool off crowd outside G20 summit
Police in Hamburg Germany have deployed Mobile Hydration Wagons in an effort to cool down overheated and thirsty crowds gathered out side the G20...
White House admits Trump thought Korean War was fought in Star Trek
The White House has apparently confirmed that POTATUS, Donald Trump, thought the Korean War was a war fought in the 1970's in Star Trek.
The...
