Trump sues porn star for breaching confidentiality agreement about affair he claims not to...
Lawyers for the actual President of the United States of America are seeking $20 million in damages from a porn star who he says...
Only a good guy with a nuclear weapon can stop a bad guy with...
The only way to stop a bad guy with a nuclear weapon is a good guy with a nuclear weapon. That's according to the...
Just £3 a month will pay for cocaine and child prostitutes for an Oxfam...
A new fundraising campaign from Oxfam appealing to the better nature of child abusers is asking for just £3 a month to pay for...
Boy Scouts of America deny meeting Donald Trump
The Boy Scouts of America have issued a statement denying meeting Donald Trump.
“It never happened. It's fake news folks.” The statement begins.
“Only a sick,...
Massive weapon condemns massive weapon’s massive weapon test
A massive weapon took to social media this morning to condemn the massive weapon test of another massive weapon.
It's unclear at this point who...
Rank outsider sweeps to completely surprising victory in Turkish Presidential election
A rank-outsider has swept to victory in Turkey's presidential election defying the odds to secure a third five year term.
Election authority chief said "imagine...
Paul Nuttall admits to FBI he passed US nuclear secrets to Russia
Paul Nuttall has sensationally admitted to the FBI that he passed US military secrets to Russia.
In a statement to the FBI Mr Nuttall admitted delivering...
Trump Spokesman Revealed As Black Knight
The Herald can exclusively reveal today that the Trump campaign aide, Michael Cohen, is the mysterious Black Knight.
The secretive warrior and guard to stuff...
Trump Perfected Curtsy For Saudi King Salman
Donald Trump's impeachment looked ever more certain in the last few days after images were released of him curtsying before King Salman of Saudi...
Your 60 second news round-up
Here's The Rochdale Herald's round-up of today's important news headlines:
- UKIP leader's girlfriend is a nasty little racist
- Nicola Sturgeon backs a second Scottish...
Anyone actively calling for a war to be automatically drafted to the front line
Anybody saying there should be a war may be required to put their money where their mouth is in future.
In a new bid to...
Idiot dies in Karmic Avalanche
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Teruel in Aragon, Spain, yesterday.
Victor Barrio (29), having spent the last 9...
Wright brothers blamed for rise in immigration
Criticism has been placed upon two American inventors for the dramatic rise in immigration, it has been confirmed.
Brothers Orville and Wilbur Wright, who are...
Crack pot dictator arrives in Singapore to meet Kim Jong Un
Singapore: Crack-pot dictator and wannabe dictator Donald Trump has arrived in Singapore to meet crack-pot dictator Kim Jong Un.
It's hoped that the pair may...
US Closes Wardrobe Border Travel Bans on Narnians and Radical Followers of Aslan
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order immediately banning "followers of Aslan" from entering the US.
This will instantly affect talking beavers, centaurs...
Dyson vacuum cleaners issue blanket denial of Trump wiretap allegations
UK based vacuum cleaner and household electronics company Dyson has no involvement whatsoever in spying on US President Donald Trump, sources close to the...




















































