Oh for F**k’s sake – say world leaders following Trump nomination
Leaders around the world let out a simultaneous sigh of despair last night as the Republican Party confirmed Donald Trump's presidential nomination.
In yet another...
Absolute arsehole Winnie Mandela dies aged 81
An absolute arsehole has died in South Africa aged 81.
Shit closer to hitting fan than yesterday
Analysts and experts of faecal matters are saying that the shit, that was yesterday quite close to the fan, is now a bit closer...
College Professor assaults Trump supporter
A college professor in the US has come under fire from leading figures in the Republican Party after he allegedly assaulted a number of...
Seriously?
I mean, just....Fuck, Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.
A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
Donald Trump denies allegations he has rigged erections
The allegation was made by Anthony "Fandango" Scaramucci following his removal from post.
The President's former tiny-right-hand man lashed out indiscriminately at his former...
Mass shootings are an unsolvable problem says country with a mass shootings problem
A country that has a really serious problem with deranged lunatics buying really big guns and shooting dozens of strangers has publicly said it...
Trump’s American Dream – 25 Million to Leave the Country
Donald J. Trump unveiled a pledge on Thursday to create 25 million jobs over the next decade, but experts are arguing whether they strictly...
UK to mobilise army of “social media warriors” to protect Gibraltar
With no aircraft carriers and military resources already overstretched in Afghanistan, the Ministry of Defence has announced that it is calling up the UK's "third force"...
President of corrupt shithole country to meet President of Nigeria Muhammadu Buhari
Nigerian President Muhammadu Buhari will become the first leader from sub-Saharan Africa to be received by the President of the corrupt North American tin...
ISIS win the war by leaving passports at home
America, Russia and the United Nations admitted defeat earlier today and proclaimed ISIS the winners of the global holy war.
President elect Trump has already...
Stop calling people cocks you dick, White House HR Department tells Anthony Scaramucci
The White House HR Department has asked their latest recruit Anthony Scaramucci, the new White House Communications Director, to please, please, please stop calling...
German Police deploy hydration wagons to cool off crowd outside G20 summit
Police in Hamburg Germany have deployed Mobile Hydration Wagons in an effort to cool down overheated and thirsty crowds gathered out side the G20...
Dyson vacuum cleaners issue blanket denial of Trump wiretap allegations
UK based vacuum cleaner and household electronics company Dyson has no involvement whatsoever in spying on US President Donald Trump, sources close to the...
Donald Trump to appear on Jeremy Kyle Show
Jeremy Kyle was said to be jubilant this morning after securing an exclusive appearance by Donald Trump.
The show which is titled "Five children by...
Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...
A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in...
