President Trump’s half-brother assassinated in Kuala Lumpur
In a shocking announcement from Malayasia, official sources have revealed that President Donald Trump's half-brother has been assassinated at Kuala Lumpur Airport.
According to local TV reports, Mr...
Alcoholics Anonymous of America add 13th Step – Don’t Fucking Bother
After 63 years of success Alcoholics Anonymous of America have added a 13th Step to their eponymous programme - Step 13: Don't Fucking Bother.
The...
Outrage as American woman forced to wear hijab
Supporters of Donald Trump's travel ban have been outraged by this picture of a white American woman who has been forced to wear a...
Latin America overdoses on Irony as CIA complains Russia rigged US election
Thousands of people are feared dead in Central and Latin America this week after literally laughing their heads off at the news that the...
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Marine Le Pen demands Malian be charged with breaking and entering
Marine Le Pen has demanded to know why a Malian refugee was given citizenship and not arrested for breaking and entering over the weekend....
UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...
Trump Press Secretary buys fireproof underpants
The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.
He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos...
Heroic arsonist awarded posthumous bravery medal for putting out fire
A heroic self-admitted arsonist in Northern Ireland has been awarded a posthumous medal for bravery after spending half a lifetime putting out suspicious looking...
Democratic Democrats protest against anti-democratic democracy
Protesters smashed windows and turned violent in Oregon and a few other places last night.
“Trump is anti-democratic!” yelled the crowd protesting against the man...
White House denies that men in white coats are coming to take Trump away
Electing Donald 'The Donald' Trump as their president was undoubtedly one of the most mystifying decisions made by the American people since changing the...
Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions
President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Dominic Raab announces sanctions on Isle of Aran
Foreign Secretary, Dominic Raab has announced sanctions on the Isle of Aran. Mr Raaab announced the sanctions during a visit to Blackpool Tower in...
Trump tells reporters that he’s cured Megadeth
POTATUS, Donald Trump has made a sensational claim that he's cured Megadeth today.
In a rambling 4 hour speech Trump said, "You know what's amazing?...
Katie Hopkins killed and eaten by starving migrants
Mail Online columnist Katie Hopkins' plan to drown migrants attempting to cross the Mediterranean to prevent them coming to the UK has been put...
Liam Fox Announces Trade Deal With Iraq
Liam Fox, Secretary of State For International Trade, has followed up the success of his charm offensive with Duterte, the leader of the Philippines...



















































