Russia accuse Boris of hysterical Russophobia

Russia has responded to Boris Johnson's accusations of war crimes by counter-accusing the British government and Boris in particular of 'Russophobia.' Despite what one may assume, this is not the fear of trendy young comedians...
Donald Trump

President Trump’s hairpiece flown over Korean peninsula in B-1 bomber

It was reported this evening that President Donald Trump’s golden hairpiece has been flown over the Korean peninsula in a B-1 Bomber as a direct response to North Korea’s latest ballistic missile test. The Trump...

Spain apologises to Catalonia saying I’m sorry you made me hit you

THE SPANISH GOVERNMENT'S representative in Catalonia has, sort of, apologised to those injured by the Iberian Stasi during Sunday's independence referendum. Enric Millo, playing the drunken wife-beater to Catalonia’s spouse-in-the-corner, blamed the Catalan Government for...
Dominic Raab

Dominic Raab announces sanctions on Isle of Aran

Foreign Secretary, Dominic Raab has announced sanctions on the Isle of Aran. Mr Raaab announced the sanctions during a visit to Blackpool Tower in his Hull constituency. In a statement the Foreign Office...
Trump Idiotic

Book criticising Trump to be boycotted by people who have never bought a book.

There is growing support among Republican voters for a nationwide boycott of the book 'Fire and Fury' which contains several damaging claims about President Trump. It is estimated that millions of Republicans, representing approximately 0.01%...
Donald Trump

New tariffs ensure American guns used to shoot American children made from American metal

Donald Trump has just revealed that the reason behind the new Steel Import Tariffs is to mitigate concerns that the deadly and easily purchased Assault Rifles used in mass school shootings recently have just...

Trump ecstatic at 99% approval rating from alt-right protesters

Speaking about the rally on Saturday Trump is alleged to have said, "There sure was a lot of people there. The press will say it was about 200 people. It looked about 45,000. That set a record. They all set a record. Obama never got that many alt-right supporters. They came because of me and I'm proud of that. It's my greatest achievement as President so far."

US celebrates Independence Day by ceding from Trump

Secret delegations from the 50 states of the United States of America have agreed a plan to avoid the impeachment of Donald Trump as President of The United States of America, The Rochdale Herald...
Trump Walking

Trump to visit Texas just as soon as the golf courses have been reopened

Donald Trump has announced he intends to visit areas of Texas affected by flooding just as soon as the cleaning operation on Texan golf courses is complete. In a tweet Trump said, "Wow. Just had confirmation...
Donald Trump female

Mayor of New Orleans accidentally summons Donald Trump after saying ‘Hurricane’ five times

Mitch Landrieu, the Mayor of New Orleans has told has told us that he inadvertently summoned Donald Trump to New Orleans. The Mayor said, "I was going through a few things in my head whilst...

National security at stake after Donald Trump gets stuck in revolving door

The removal from office of Anthony "You're fired!" Scaramucci and Reince "You're fired too!" Priebus have prompted many White House insiders to consider the Trump administration as merely an extension of The Apprentice. As the...

I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump

Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.

Climate Change is a hoax insists Texan on a raft

Despite his trailer having flooded and all his possessions being lost to water damage, defiant Texan, Ray "Buckeye" McCready is travelling around his home state on a makeshift raft to convince others that climate change is a hoax.

Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU

In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.

UK “unsafe” says Trump as British Armed Police “Worst in the World”

Donald Trump has declared Britain "unsafe for US Citizens" as the UK Armed Police have been named the worst in the World on the influential Slager Scale. Named after Michael Slager - the fat,...
Donald Trump

Trump in hiding as NRA call for curb ‘on rapid fire tools’

DONALD TRUMP is believed to be in hiding tonight after the National Rifle Association called for a clamp-down on “rapid fire tools”. This has been widely taken as a reference to the constant stream of...

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