Northern woman puts heating on
A woman from the North of England has shocked the country by putting the heating on in October.
Denise Dufite, originally from the northern town...
Britain warned Brexit could be as bad as Star Wars: The Phatom Menace
Britain has been warned that Brexit could be as bad as Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. The warning comes a week after the Government...
Wetherspoons to rebrand as “Special Circle of Hell”
Pub chain Wetherspoons is to re-brand as the Special Circle of Hell following an endorsement by EU President Donald Tusk.
A spokesman for the company...
British retail workers thrilled about opportunity to sign on using blue passport
British retail workers have revealed that they're looking forward to signing on with blue passports.
Cliff Edge told us, "Not having a job or any...
Man singing “Free Tommy Robinson” thought he was entering competition to meet him
A man who spent yesterday in London singing "Free Tommy Robinson" has said he thought he was entering a competition to meet him.
Dave Wild...
Brexiteers demand Government grants cognitive dissonance settled status
Brexiteers have demanded the Government grant settled status to cognitive dissonance. The demands come as many companies that employ lots of people in Britain...
Outrage after child attends school Halloween party dressed as a MOSQUE
A group of parents is said to have been left "absolutely fummin (sic)" after a child turned up to a local Halloween party dressed...
Young people urged to move to areas with cheaper housing and spend savings on...
The Government is to tell young people that they should move away from urban centers in order to pay less rent.
With rents increasing in...
Life expectancy soars in Wolverhampton after McDonalds strike for 2 days
Experts say that life expectancy in Wolverhampton has soared after the McDonalds on Dudley Street was closed on Monday and Tuesday due to strike...
Arms manufacturers to commemorate the fallen dead
Since 1919, on the second Sunday of November, otherwise known as Remembrance Sunday, a two minute silence has been observed at 11am at war...
Michael Gove themed garden gnomes to be stocked by Homebase
Domestic retail giant Homebase is rumoured to be about to bow to pressure from Michael Gove's employer, Rupert Murdoch, by stocking a series of...
David Davis-Brexit Speech in full
In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
Clock in the car delighted to be right for next six months
The clock in the car is said to be absolutely over the moon that the clocks have gone forward or back again.
Nuclear holocaust averted as Southern Rail selected to deliver US missile attack
A spokesman for Southern Rail confirmed to the Rochdale Herald that in view of the anticipated two day delay the four minute warning given in advance of nuclear attacks would consequently be extended to 2,880 minutes.
Southerner changes view of North after paying less than £7 for a pint
A pig headed Southern man has reduced his negative opinion of the north by 0.00000001% after spending a delightful weekend in Heckmondwicke.
Southerner Paul Thatcher-Wright,...
Doubling homelessness through reduced spending on welfare is excellent value claim Tories
As the National Audit Office revealed that homelessness of all kinds has doubled over the past 6 years, a Tory spokesman has confirmed that...
