Trump mobilizes Military to defend against Hurricane Irma with ‘fire and fury’
As hurricane Irma makes it's way west towards the coast of Florida, president Donald Trump has issued a declaration of war on the weather...
Scotland to ban Smack for children
The Scottish government has confirmed that children will no longer be able to use Smack in Scotland.
The move would make the country the first...
Polite man starves to death whilst holding door open for ungrateful strangers
A polite man has starved to death in full view of the public while holding a door open for ungrateful strangers at the John...
More Guardian Subscriptions Cancelled Over Fresh Crossword Slur
Following yesterday's scandal that saw literally units of enraged Scotts cancelling their subscriptions, The Guardian's simple crossword this morning poured fresh fuel onto the...
Rail Companies to simplify process of deciding which is the worst
Following recent criticism from the rail regulator, Train operating companies (TOCs) are to make it easier for travellers to decide which has the worst...
Chris Grayling announces he’s pregnant after taking Covid-19 antibody test
Chris Grayling has revealed he's pregnant after he took the new Covid-19 antibody test.
A spokesman said, "It came as quite a surprise for Chris...
UKIP elect Diane James leader
UKIP have elected Diane James as their new leader.
Apologies for our previous article that featured Mick Jagger from The Rollong Stones.
Our intern Douglas has...
May announces textile regeneration scheme for the Northern Powerhouse
As the race for the Tory Party Leadership heats up, Teresa May has today announced transformative economic reform plans for the Northern Powerhouse.
The ambitious...
Sex education in primary schools should be banned, says Burnley gran, 19
Sex education has been given the thumbs down by Burnley gran Ellie-Mae-Leigh Horne. 19 year old Ellie-Mae-Leigh, whose eldest daughter Chelsea-Leigh has just given...
I’m glad she can spend more time with family, says deported Brit who won’t...
Amber Rudd has resigned as Home Secretary, saying she "inadvertently misled" MPs over which policies of her predecessor, Theresa May, she was continuing to...
Donald Trump declares Buckingham Palace ‘shit hole’ and offers to pay for repairs.
After a petition to stop the orange Hitler visiting the Queen passed 1.7 million signatures, the tyrannical dictator offered to meet the new President...
Commie Corbyn pledges to nationalise your teeth
Bearded Trotskyite do-gooder, Jeremy Corbyn has taken a break from sending care packages full of homemade jam to terrorists, to nationalise absolutely everything.
Clueless commie...
Buckingham Palace announces Prince Andrew to tour Paris road tunnels
Buckingham Palace has announced that Prince Andrew will go on a state visit of Parisian road tunnels later this week.
In a statement a spokesman...
David Davis-Brexit Speech in full
In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
Travelling 250 miles to avoid taking care of child unsurprisingly fine with Boris Johnson
The role of senior Downing Street Adviser Dominic Cummings was called into question after news emerged that he had seen fit to visit the...
Next leaders debate to be chaired by Jeremy Kyle and feature Boris Johnson paternity...
The next General Election leaders debate will feature a new format hosted by Jeremy Kyle. There will also be a paternity test at the...
