Everyone on Facebook expert in analytical chemistry all of a sudden
Everyone on Facebook is now an expert in analytical chemistry it has been revealed.
The news comes after scientists at Porton Down revealed that they...
Teenager buys girlfriend a cucumber for Christmas
A teenager has told us how he believes he's bought his girlfriend the perfect Christmas gift.
16 year old Nathan Brindley has been seeing Emma...
Islamic poppies being considered by the Royal British Legion
Islamic poppies, which would be green, with a white star and crescent, are being discussed by the Royal British Legion.
This has predictably stirred up...
BBC Countryfile Filming Suspended After Presenter Gets Parking Ticket
Filming of cutting edge BBC show Countryfile was dramatically suspended last night after one of the presenters was accused of parking illegally.
Previously well respected...
Britain First’s Paul Golding and the EDL’s Ian Crossland announce engagement
Shock today as Britain First leader Paul Golding announced he is to marry EDL chief, Ian Crossland.
Although the pair often claim to support gay...
Northern Shithole Celebrates UK Capital of Culture with Pie and Peas and a Knobbly...
About 60,000 people came out in Hull to watch a Burger Eating Contest & Arm Wrestling show to mark the start of the city's...
Woman who said she’s fine really is fine
In a world first a woman from Rochdale who told her husband that she was “fine” has turned out to really be “fine”. Genuinely...
British man who can speak French to be burned as a witch
According to reports the British man who has learnt to speak a foreign language fluently is to be burnt at the stake on Tuesday.
Lord...
‘Corporal punishment should be reinstated’ – people against Sharia law
A recent survey of lobotomised knuckle dragging fuck nuggets revealed that they are fighting against the values that they themselves hold most dear.
We caught...
Drug Dealers Move to Distance Themselves from Hopkins
Ketamine dealers nationwide have moved to distance themselves from Katie Hopkins, it has been confirmed.
The news came following the upholding of a complaint by...
You’re In Or You’re Out
Casual racism is set to become a thing of the past under new Prime Minister Theresa May.
Shoe-obsessed Theresa May has announced plans to eradicate...
Great start for Meghan Markle as she manages to walk around slowly and wave
The future of the British monarchy, American Meghan Markle, has successfully negotiated her first official public engagement as she absolutely nailed walking slowly and...
Prince Andrew says, I was at Pizza Express checking out Beatrice’s fit friend
Prince Andrew has today sought to clarify comments he made about attending Pizza Express in Woking 19 years ago.
A spokesman for Prince Andrew said,...
WTO confirms nations can trade with U.K. on a ‘pity fuck’ basis.
The WTO has confirmed that in the case of a no deal Brexit, member nations will be free to trade with the U.K. as...
Man gets straw into Capri Sun first go
A bloke from Rochdale is being praised as some kind of wizard today after getting a straw into a Capri Sun on his effort.
Ryan...
I’m unlikely to put up with your shit much longer, cat tells owner after...
A 4 year old black and white cat from Twickenham has told its owner Steve that "It's pretty fucking unlikely that I will be...
