Babies born in Britain today to hear about home ownership via myths and legends
Researchers from the Rochdale Institute for Social Morphology released today the results of their latest study into the changing oral traditions of the British...
Peter Andre to press Brexit Button
As part of her Key Note speech to the Conservative Party Conference today Theresa May is set to announce this explosive coup for the...
Government toasts success as rate of reduction in homelessness doubles
Homeless reduction is the latest resounding success for Britain's most popular female Prime Minister ever.
The May Government has shown that not only may it...
Queen’s festive question for Balmoral faithful
Her Majesty The Queen has returned to the Balmoral Estate to spend time with her family over the Christmas holiday and will be attending...
Husband Goes Shopping Buys Everything on List
A woman from Cleckheaton told The Rochdale Herald today how her husband went shopping, with a list, and returned an hour and a half...
Nigel Farage denies any links to Russia
Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has appeared on BBC Breakfast TV to deny any links to the Russian Government.
In an interview Mr Farage MP...
Dirty Politics
Britain's next Prime Minister is guaranteed to be female but what most people don't know yet is that only one of the contenders will...
Big 6 to impose “Christmas Levy” on consumers
The Big 6 electricity providers are set to impose a special levy on households deemed to have displays of more than 5 metres of...
Man falls to death after Christmas party gets out of hand
A German national has plummeted to his death after a Christmas party at the Nakatomi Tower in Los Angeles got a little bit out...
We must reverse historic mistake, says irreversible historic mistake
Everyone in the world looked at each other and asked "what the hell" yesterday after the temerity of a former political leader's comments on...
Great weather for ducks, confirm ducks
Ducks around the UK have confirmed that they are having a really lovely day and are enjoying the weather.
Speaking from the middle of a...
Christmas ruined after husband caught shagging secretary on Christmas Eve
Christmas is officially ruined after the managing director of a local advertising agency was caught by his wife bonking his secretary on Christmas Eve.
Father...
It was straightforward shooting not sex, says Prince Andrew
Young girls were released into the Sandringham Estate and shot at as part of Ghislaine Maxwell's birthday celebrations, Prince Andrew has revealed.
The Duke of...
Further scandal as so called satirical page Southend News Network owners aren’t even Southern!
In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at...
Theresa May Fumbles For Pin For Grenade She Shoved Up Her Ass
Theresa May is reported to be surrounded by a Bomb Disposal Unit this evening after the discovery of an unexploded grenade inside her ass.
The...
British meteorologists blame wet August on an increase in cloud storage by Apple
The weather scientist went on to predict industrialised nations have a maximum of one year before the amount of material stored in the cloud reaches a critical mass of never ending rain.
