National News

The new Brexit Secretary, Jeremy Rees-Gove has told hard-line Brexiteers to downplay their expectations. "It's become clear that writing something on the side of a bus is no guarantee of achieving it, as we had...

According to reports in the Daily Mail today the Queen has been forced to defend herself from a marauding Muslim immigrant with a sword. A Daily Express staff witness said: "Liz was forced to tap...

Accident prone Paul Nuttall, leader of UKIP, faced fresh tragedy today after learning that all his ‘close personal seats’ were lost in an election catastrophe. Grim-faced Paul had returned home after spending time on the...

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has layed out plans to take RyanAir into public ownership alongside the railways and the Royal Mail in a radical manifesto that promises to solve every problem instantly. A draft...

We keep hearing Donald saying he's going to make America great again, sounds good to us but we were curious to find out when precisely it was great. So we asked Douglas to do some...

  Fifa officials last night refused to comment on rumours that they all turned down Vladimir Putin's offer of an all-expenses paid trip to Zizzi's in Moscow.  However, The Rochdale Herald's brown envelope full of money...

Prime Minister Theresa May will change her name to Votey McVoteface ahead of this Thursday's general election. With the election a matter of hours away and with Jeremy Corbyn's Labour Party snapping at the Tories'...

Following news today that Prince William asked various drug users about their views on current drug laws, The Rochdale Herald was approached by a source close to royal. Well, a source who knows someone...

The government is set to announce its new scheme to combat childhood obesity on Thursday, a scheme that is mostly a tax on high sugar products, despite accusations from dieticians that the idea is...

Tory MP David Davies has demanded that the most recent group of refugee children, newly arrived in Britain, be taken straight to the dentist.  After their perilous journey, together with their ordeal in the jungle...

In a bid to expand on the non-gay male ice cream market, a new extreme sports cryogenic experience for man men is being launched. It will contain jalapeño peppers recorded at 15 million on the...

A shock revelation on BBC Breakfast this morning revealed that British police forces are using fizzy drink to subdue suspects. The footage was taken from the body-cam of an officer who appears to be from...

Britons who travelled to Syria to fight for the so-called Islamic State will be welcomed back into the country with a FREE roast dinner at Buckingham Palace, the Herald has learned. The controversial proposal is...

Women across the UK have taken to social media to appeal to their families to not buy them “shite” presents this year.

The Royal Mail have announced a special stamp to commemorate Brexit today. The stamp will be a first class stamp and cost £6. The Daily Telegraph's Bill Board said, "This is excellent news. It's been...