Allegations have recently arisen that Conservative MP and incumbent minister of the cabinet office, Damian Green MP had been browsing and downloading ‘thousands’ of pornographic images on his work computers.

The allegations that the MP viewed prolific amounts of porn have been backed up after reviewing the MP’s expense claims.

“It was all a big mistake, I was searching for the Horn Pub, which I’m fairly certain is a real establishment in my constituency, but I fear I miss-typed and in my frustration to click off of the resulting website, I accidentally selected several thousand explicit videos and also signed up for a years premium membership”

Questions have arisen regarding the eligibility of the Secretary of State’s expense claims, which include Porn Hub and other pornographic website memberships totalling up to £220.

Expense claims have also been requested for several bottles of hand moisturiser and boxes of tissues.

When questioned about these other eye-brow raising additions to his claim, Mr Green said:

“I have to do a lot of hand shaking in my job, so soft hands are necessity. I also blow my loa-eer nose often… allergies you see.”

We asked the opposition parties if they had a statement on the scandal. A spokesman from the Labour party said:

“Its highly inappropriate for an MP to use public funded equipment and work hours to view illicit material, but at least he’s not trying to claim back on poppers and rent boys like Keith Vaz.”