Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services

0
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services. In the statement, Chancellor of...
Chris Grayling

Chris Grayling announces he’s pregnant after taking Covid-19 antibody test

0
Chris Grayling has revealed he's pregnant after he took the new Covid-19 antibody test.  A spokesman said, "It came as quite a surprise for Chris...

Tories to pledge crackdown on food bankers’ bonuses

A leaked copy of the Conservative Party's election manifesto has revealed plans to crackdown on 'luxury' items being handed out to those forced to...

Outrage after child attends school Halloween party dressed as a MOSQUE

0
A group of parents is said to have been left "absolutely fummin (sic)" after a child turned up to a local Halloween party dressed...

Boris Johnson discovers he’s won half a speedboat at Chequers

0
Boris Johnson, Michael Gove and David Davis have won half a speedboat at the Conservative Party away day at Chequers today. The trio were...
Kate and William

Royal baby has already earned more than you

0
The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have left hospital after increasing the burden on the taxpayer for a third time. The new prince, who was...
Bored Cat And Dog

Wheelie Bin Cat purr-sues new career as guard dog trainer

0
Lola the ninja feline, from Coventry, was once again discovered in a rather strange location. This time it was in a Romford working men’s...
Hangmans Noose

Tories Include Return of Death Penalty In Election Manifesto

0
The Conservative Party has surprised many by including a return of the death penalty in their election manifesto. Explaining the eye catching manifesto promise, Jacob...

1000’s of tea plantation jobs go as Yorkshire Tea announces it’s moving production to...

0
There are fears that thousands of tea plantation workers in Yorkshire could lose their jobs as makers of Yorkshire Tea, Taylors of Harrogate, announced...
Celebrating Man

Rochdale man abandons Marxism after winning £10 on lottery

5
A Rochdale resident has been explaining how winning £10 on the lottery has made him re-evaluate his position on Marxism. Shea Bukharin told the Herald,...

Parents Bigger Liars Than Politicians

0
Research done by students at Rochdale's Kingsway Park school suggests that parents are bigger liars than politicians. 6th Former Tom Wilkes who was head of the...

Shipping alert as Monster Fatberg spotted in Caribbean

1
The Caribbean is facing more misery this week as islanders struggle to deal with the destruction left in the wake of Hurricane Irma. What has...
Mum Laundry

Busy Mum of four in TWO-wash SHOCK

Working Mum-of-two Linda Green, 43, sorted, washed, dried and folded TWO full loads of laundry yesterday thanks to the heatwave that has swept through...

Labour MP Needs To Bathe In Ocean

Wanky-named cod impersonator and Labour MP Thangar Debonairre (ironically in charge of modern culture!) was recently told to "Get in the sea," by a...
Cross Eyed Man

The light shines out of my arse, says man who got toothpaste and Anusol...

8
Rochdale resident Des Spondent, 46, was getting ready for work one dark morning when the mix-up occurred. The sores in his mouth miraculously healed, and...
snowstorm

Amber Weather Warning follow reports Northerner is thinking about getting big coat out of...

0
The Met Office has issued an amber warning for apocalyptic snow and ice overnight after a Northerner was overheard speculating that it might be...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts