Michael McIntyre

Comic Relief to be just Michael McIntyre and a bunch of Russells in future

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The BBC announced today that all future Comic Relief events will simply be Michael McIntyre and people called Russell running around and doing observational...
Snow on trees

Britain urged to get used to winter

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With the annual two inches of snow set to cause havoc across the country again experts have advised people to stop whining and get...

Rochdale Herald exclusive – Prince Andrew tells us about Princess Beatrice’s wedding

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In a Rochdale Herald exclusive Prince Andrew tells us how the secret wedding of his daughter Beatrice went last week. 7am - Woken up by...

Scientists Prove Fake News Caused by “A lack of bullying in schools”

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Scientists believe they have proven the rise of Fake News is a direct consequence of the decline of bullying in schools. Professor Andrei Clewsov of...

OED announces Word Of The Year

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The Oxford English Dictionary announced the winner of their prestigious Word Of The Year competition at a champagne gala ceremony in London's upmarket Neasden...

Coronavirus causes charmer to consider condoms

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Since moving to London, St Cuthbert's alumnus Ben Green has prided himself on, in his own words, "spreading his chutney round Putney".  Claiming to...
Confused iPhone

Mensa exam to be replaced by attempting to sync iTunes

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International high IQ club Mensa has announced plans to scrap their famously difficult entrance exam, and replace it with a quest to negotiate Apple's...

2017 set to be hottest year on record

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Experts in worldwide trends are predicting that 2017 will reach terminal levels of warmth by mid-June. Professor Thorfin Nerfstretcherrsson, Head of Rochdale Community University's department...

Secret owners of 1 million tax dodging companies registered in British Virgin Islands furious...

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The secret owners of an estimated one million companies registered in the British Virgin Islands Sunday registered their displeasure at the UK government's slow...
Amber Rudd

I’m glad she can spend more time with family, says deported Brit who won’t...

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Amber Rudd has resigned as Home Secretary, saying she "inadvertently misled" MPs over which policies of her predecessor, Theresa May, she was continuing to...

Corbyn train lie proves case for nationalisation

After it was revealed today that Jeremy Corbyn lied about having to sit on the floor of a train he claimed was ram packed,...
Big Ben

Sound of Jeremy Hunt flushing money down forty grand toilet replaces Big Ben chimes...

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NHS workers and the general public were reassured this morning to learn Jeremy Hunt flushing money down his new toilet will replace the sound...

Bloke donates money to charity without fingering a stranger

United Kingdom - A bloke from the United Kingdom has become the first man ever to make a donation to charity without sexually assaulting a stranger, according to reports.

Interest Rates Dropped From Naff All to Sweet FA

Bank of England catastrophe juggler, Mark Carney, made no change to interest rates this lunchtime. Rochdale savers wondering exactly what this means have had things...

Nuttall loses close personal seats in election disaster

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Accident prone Paul Nuttall, leader of UKIP, faced fresh tragedy today after learning that all his ‘close personal seats’ were lost in an election...
Julian Assange

Ecuadorian embassy reveals Julian Assange has accidentally ordered a trailer tent whilst drunk

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The Ecuadorian embassy have put an advert up for the sale of a trailer tent that Julian Assange accidentally ordered whilst drunk. An embassy employee...

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