RSPCA urges pet owners to at least season with salt and pepper before leaving...
In the current heat wave the RSPCA has urged pet owners to undertake special precautionary measures when traveling with their furry friends this bank...
Theresa May admits “Brexit Bill” scrawled on back of napkin
Prime Minister Theresa May today admitted that the 'Brexit Bill', allowing her to trigger the Article 50 exit clause from the European Union had been drafted,...
Britain First blame Foreigner for it being Cold As Ice
We don't care if you've heard this joke before, because for us, it Feels Like The First Time.
Dirty White Boy fan club Britain First...
That’ll Show Them…
Racists reacted with predictable denial today when faced with the reality that the punishments they frequently recommend for those seeking asylum, immigrants and generally...
Britain Not Full – claim small group of enochlophobia sufferers
Today, a small group of enochlophobia sufferers have spoken out to declare Britain is NOT full.
A spokesman for 'Enochlophobia Martyrs for the Prevention of...
Britain’s Children Rejoice as Broccoli Rationed
Playgrounds and schools all over the country were full of joyous celebration as Britain's children heard that Broccoli has been rationed.
"Fabbolishus!", declared Ryan Whingeing...
UKIP call for Global Warming referendum
In what is seen as a bid to rescue UKIP from self-inflicted obsolescence, leadership hopeful and Anthony Head lookalike, Steven Woolfe has today called...
Bad dishwasher etiquette is evidence of evolution running backwards
Anthropologists working at the University of Bath today released a study which they claim demonstrates that the human race appears to be separating into...
Prince Philip is ‘perfectly fine’ Palace assures public
HRH Prince Philip was straight back to work today insulting foreigners just three days after being released from hospital.
Palace officials were quick to point...
Convertible car owner not as smug after leaving the top down last night
Sandra Numpton of Heywood has spent the last few days driving around in her convertible Mini Cooper, sun glasses on, hair in the wind,...
We must reverse historic mistake, says irreversible historic mistake
Everyone in the world looked at each other and asked "what the hell" yesterday after the temerity of a former political leader's comments on...
Farage performs volte-face on Europe after Trump-May love in
Seven times unelected former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has announced he may be in favour of the UK's European Union membership after all.
In an...
Piers Morgan leads star studded sing along to F**k Tha Police
Piers Morgan shared a video on Tuesday night showing him and other self-quarantined celebrities singing NWA's "Fuck Tha Police"
"Hi guys. Day who knows what...
Digging f#*#*#g foxholes is new black in today’s British Army
The humble British Army entrenching tool, a short, squat, folding standard NATO issued 3-way shovel, pick and close combat weapon, has surged in popularity amongst...
Brexit Halloween Threat
Preparations for the commercialisation of an ancient pagan tradition were thrown into disarray today when importers of Halloween costumes reported that due to poor...
Rochdale voted town most likely to turn to cannibalism first in post Brexit food...
Success came to Rochdale today as Britain voted and decided that Rochdale was the town most likely to first turn to cannibalism in the...




















































