Roof Falling Down Fastest Thing About Southern Rail
Southern Rail execs are busy trying to figure out how to blame unions for one of their trains falling to bits on its way...
Whole UK Economy resting on single PPI claim
After the referendum on leaving the EU the treasury scrambled quickly to try and formulate a plan.
"No one actually thought the plebs would defy...
Special D-Day edition of Daily Mail includes special pull out of it supporting fascism...
The Daily Mail has revealed its very special D-Day supplement today. The supplement will be available this weekend and looks back to a time...
Killer Ian Brady’s ashes shot into space, by most expensive means possible and paid...
Reports have been across all of the mainstream press today regarding the Moors murderer, Ian Brady’s remains being buried at sea.
A shock report...
Edinburgh caught in grip of Calamine lotion shortage as midge season starts
Insect repellent sold out today as the temperature north of the border rose above zero, Spring sprang and Edinburgh played host to the annual...
Man still wearing shorts admits his legs are cold
Tom Hodgkins of Heywood today admitted that wearing shorts in winter is a bad idea and his leg are cold.
We caught up with Tom,...
Prince Harry gets job as Prince Harry look-alike
Prince Harry has a new job as a Prince Harry look-alike in Canada.
His new boss told us, "There's a lot of attention on Prince...
Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 2,000 Gifts bought in 72 hours
Three days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People...
Green Cross Code Man killed in hit and run tragedy
The Green Cross Code Man has been killed in Rochdale in a terribly ironic tragedy involving a silent Ocado electric delivery van and a mobile phone.
Remain Voter Desperately Waiting for Pound to Die
Due to an almost pathological desire to be proven correct, a Remain voter is obsessively checking the sterling exchange rate for signs of terminal illness.
"A bad...
Let’s get this over with Says Queen
Her Majesty the Queen has today told the government "Let's get this over with. I've got a horse in the 3pm at Ascot".
Her worshipfulness...
Husband remembers to do thing
There were ecstatic scenes in Rochdale this afternoon after a Middleton resident remembered to do the thing he'd been asked to do earlier in...
Britons Now Incapable Of Making Any Decision Without A Referendum
The majority of British people are now incapable of making a decision without first holding a referendum, according to a study published today.
Researchers...
Anne Frank’s diary found to contain script for pilot episode of Mrs Brown’s Boys
The wartime diary of Anne Frank has been found to contain a script for the pilot episode of Mrs. Brown's Boys.
Recent imaging analysis of...
Torquay becomes UK Hate Capital overnight
A new survey of social attitudes out earlier today has revealed that Torquay has turned into the Hate Capital of the UK overnight after...
Hampstead Heath Glory Holes to close in respect for George Michael
Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael.
A...
