Lemming suicide myth rebunked
For many years the myth persisted that Lemmus lemmus, known to you and I as the lemming, would inexplicably hurl itself into the abyss...
Beggars fined for begging to pay begging fines
Vulnerable homeless people are now being forced into longer begging hours to pay the newly introduced fines for begging.
In another PR triumph for...
Prince Harry ruled unfit for work by ATOS
Prince Harry has been ruled unfit for work by ATOS after attending a work capability assessment.
"The Prince was sanctioned last month after he missed...
Rest of world ceases activity so BBC can cover snow
As Britain is experiencing the worst snow since last time,the rest of the world has decided to cease all activities and events to let...
We didn’t hack Paul Nuttall claims hacker group Anonymous
"We didn't hack Paul Nuttall" claims anarchistic hacker group Anonymous, as they moved to deny claims that it had hacked the UKIP leader and...
Martin Roberts Demands Recount.
Property botherer and dreadful chef Martin Roberts has demanded a recount following his failure to be elected President of the Jungle in this year's...
You don’t know what love is ’til you hold your baby for the first...
Forget looking into your bride's eyes on your wedding day, you don't know what love is until you become a parent and hold your...
Dog walkers foil Brexit
A group of dog walkers in West London found a way to foil what has become known locally as "bRexit" after a dog nearly...
Man praised for not shitting himself when followed by police car
A Rochdale man was being congratulated today after not completely shitting his pants when a police car followed him round a corner on Saturday...
Self-aggrandising, egotistical liar meets Donald Trump
Donald Trump was interviewed by self-aggrandising egotist Piers Morgan over the weekend.
Morgan, who likes to pretend to stand for traditional British values such as...
Britain gears up for Dianageddon
A lack of Britain shooting itself in the foot and Donald Trump not doing something stupid for a few days has left Britain to...
What do you mean bride’s father pays? Asks Meghan Markle’s father before heart attack
It's been suggested that Meghan Markle's dad had a heart attack shortly after being told that the brides father should pay for his daughters...
RSPCA urges pet owners to at least season with salt and pepper before leaving...
In the current heat wave the RSPCA has urged pet owners to undertake special precautionary measures when traveling with their furry friends this bank...
If we didn’t hunt foxes, horses would only do it themselves
An avid fox hunter has spoken out against the notion that his chosen 'sport' is in any way cruel to fox, hound or horse.
Sir...
I’m unlikely to put up with your shit much longer, cat tells owner after...
A 4 year old black and white cat from Twickenham has told its owner Steve that "It's pretty fucking unlikely that I will be...
First Briton shocks Britain First
Researchers from London's natural history Museum have presented the results of analysis of DNA from 'Cheddar Man', Britain's oldest complete skeleton, prompting a spokesman...
