RSPCA urges pet owners to at least season with salt and pepper before leaving...
In the current heat wave the RSPCA has urged pet owners to undertake special precautionary measures when traveling with their furry friends this bank...
Nigel Farage reveals he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good
Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has revealed that he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good.
Mr Farage MP (just kidding) was...
Writing satire ‘not even possible anymore’
Authors of satirical magazines and websites across the globe have confirmed that reality has now overtaken the worst piss-taking they could ever imagine.
"Donald Trump...
Rees-Mogg reveals time travel is workable Irish border solution
Jacob Rees-Mogg has revealed that the Irish border issue can be easily and practically solved using time travel.
Rees-Mogg revealed the plan today in a...
May announces textile regeneration scheme for the Northern Powerhouse
As the race for the Tory Party Leadership heats up, Teresa May has today announced transformative economic reform plans for the Northern Powerhouse.
The ambitious...
People who start sentences with ‘I’m not racist, but’ are definitely about to say...
Indeed, not one instance was found of a non-racist comment following "I'm not a racist, but."
Woman treated for shock after husband checks jumper washing label instructions
Heather Todd from County Durham is reeling from shock after she discovered her husband Michael not only reading the washing instruction label on a...
Boris Johnson to be blasted into space
The Government has announced that Boris Johnson is to be sent into space as part of its new space program.
An insider told us, "We'll...
Outrage after child attends school Halloween party dressed as a MOSQUE
A group of parents is said to have been left "absolutely fummin (sic)" after a child turned up to a local Halloween party dressed...
John Lewis Christmas advert shows puppy being fed into blender
Retailer John Lewis has released its Christmas advert for 2017 which shows a cute puppy being fed into an industrial strength blender.
The eagerly anticipated...
Police chiefs launch captive breeding programme in bid to boost officer numbers
Police chiefs in England and Wales have been asked to contribute their best and brightest officers to a captive breeding programme due to be launched in...
Anaconda, Bresciola and Carpet Top 3 Girls’ Names for 2016
The computer that produces the list of the most popular names given to babies each year has thrown up a remarkable result in its...
Homeworkers mysteriously suntanned
People who work from home are all looking oddly suntanned for people who work at their desks for eight hours a day, leading experts...
Prince Harry condemned for turning up to fancy dress party dressed as Paul Hollywood
The world had thought that William's half-brother and something-or-other in line to the throne's days of causing controversy were over. But today, a new...
Northerners scared by red moon consult wise woman and prepare sacrifices
Looking outside last night millions of British citizens were confronted by the moon appearing enlarged and glowing a curious red.
Whilst most people south of...
Teenager buys girlfriend a cucumber for Christmas
A teenager has told us how he believes he's bought his girlfriend the perfect Christmas gift.
16 year old Nathan Brindley has been seeing Emma...
