Chris Grayling awards ferry contract to Nigerian Prince after receiving fortuitous email
Transport Secretary, Chris Grayling has announced that the Government have awarded a contract to provide ferries in the event of a no-deal Brexit.
Grayling, the...
Smart Energy may help me keep job – says National Grid boss
The new head of the National Grid, Nicola Shaw, has today encouraged consumers to opt for "smart energy" devices which will enable her to...
Man with six kids reckons he knows more about withdrawal method than some woman
The latest Etonian voice of the people, Jacob Rees-Mogg, is convinced that his Catholicism gives him the the edge on some woman
Jacob Rees-Mogg, who...
Stonehenge to be knocked down to make way for new Super-Mosque
Details leaked from an article due to be published in the Daily Mail show plans to bulldoze the famous neolithic landmark to make way...
Russian Government says it asked Arron Banks to organise a trip to Salisbury Cathedral
Arron Banks has said that he only spoke to Russian Government officials because they had asked him to organise a tour of Salisbury Cathedral....
Children of hippy parents gear up for annual disappointment of ethical advent calendars
The children of hippies have been telling the Herald about how they've been preparing for receiving disappointing advent calendars.
8 year old Freedom Snowphish said,...
Grouse shoots report sudden increase in children’s birthday party bookings
The leaders of some of Britain's major grouse shoots have reported that children's birthday party bookings are up 100%.
Hubert Chomlomoley-Wearnear told us, "Normally at...
Completely expected and predictable weather causes travel disruption and chaos again
Britain prepares itself once again for total travel chaos and public service disruption, because of the completely predicable weather that is expected at this...
Senior Tories want to change party logo from tree to ladder to attract more...
The Conservatives may be about to dump their current tree logo and replace it with a ladder.
In 2006, the Conservative and Unionist Party dumped...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University's Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
Kitchen fitter offered job as spy
Roy Clark, a 56 year old kitchen fitter from Castleton was amazed to discover that his application for Agent of Her Majesty's Secret Service...
Sound of Jeremy Hunt flushing money down forty grand toilet replaces Big Ben chimes...
NHS workers and the general public were reassured this morning to learn Jeremy Hunt flushing money down his new toilet will replace the sound...
Royal Mail agrees to launch new £6 first class Brexit stamp
The Royal Mail have announced a special stamp to commemorate Brexit today. The stamp will be a first class stamp and cost £6.
The Daily...
Peter Andre to press Brexit Button
As part of her Key Note speech to the Conservative Party Conference today Theresa May is set to announce this explosive coup for the...
Tony the Tiger loses paw to Type 2 diabetes
Tony the Tiger, the face of the Frosties breakfast cereal brand since 1952, has according to sources, lost a paw to Type 2 diabetes.
Mr...
Prince Philip and Queen Elizabeth facing deportation post Brexit
An Emergency meeting was called at Buckingham palace earlier this week after the penny dropped with Prince Philip in regards to Brexit and complications with European immigration
"Oh...




















































