Duke of Edinburgh embroiled in food poisoning compensation scam

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The Duke of Edinburgh is reported to have become embroiled in a food poisoning compensation scam scandal today just hours after being discharged from...

Green Cross Code Man killed in hit and run tragedy

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The Green Cross Code Man has been killed in Rochdale in a terribly ironic tragedy involving a silent Ocado electric delivery van and a mobile phone.

Meghan Markle proves she’s mastered waving

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Meghan Markle revealed that she's perfected the art of waving to thousands of people. The Duchess of Sussex was appearing at the Trooping of the...
Socks and a tie on Rochdale man's Christmas list

Paul Golding Christmas Carol

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Jingle Bells My cell smells It's gloomy and its rank I only pissed some Muslims off Now I'm sitting in the tank. Hey Jingle Bells This is hell I don't think...
Congratulations

Husband remembers to put recycling bin out on right day

In a stunning feat of memory and dazzling competence a husband from Rochdale has managed to put the right bin out on the right...
Theresa May

May slams link to Wheat Supremacists claims as ‘ridiculous’

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Theresa May has dismissed claims that she met and briefed Czech Wheat Supremacists during the Cold War years as a "ridiculous smear". According to a...

Prince Andrew to move to Thailand for 6 months

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Prince Andrew has announced plans to spend 6 months of the year living in Thailand. The Prince will then spend the other 6 months...

Is the EU to blame for Storm Ciara?

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As Storm Ciara batters it's way across the country we at The Rochdale Herald ask, is the EU to blame? Bill Board, Wetherspoons Raconteur. "Of course...

Recruitment Consultant talking loudly on phone on train sounds like a bell end, agree...

Passengers from both sides of the Pennines travelling on a train between Manchester and Leeds are united in agreement that a young, overly keen...

Queen’s festive question for Balmoral faithful

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Her Majesty The Queen has returned to the Balmoral Estate to spend time with her family over the Christmas holiday and will be attending...

Chilcott’s Trojan War Report ready in the next few days

Sir John Chilcott has announced his long overdue enquiry into the Trojan War could be ready "within a matter of days". The report, long overdue...

‘Fuck equality’ says equalities boss

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The chairman of the Equality and Human Rights Commission (EHRC) David Isaac made the comment earlier this week; "Everyone is equal and all religions should be...

You moved a little bit so obviously that means we’re going for a walk,...

A family pet in North Yorkshire has jumped to the conclusion that he is about to go for a walk after his owner crossed...
Elmer Fudd

Elmer Fudd resigns as Home Secretary

The Home Secretary Elmer Fudd has resigned, Downing Street has said. Mr Fudd, was due to make a Commons Statement on Monday about the Windrush...
unhappy man

Proper Patriots furious about Po Ling Day

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Patriots across Ingerlaand are furious today after hearing that it's Po Ling Day. “Why we celebrating some bleeding foreigner, eh?” spat Rochdale UKIP supporter Arthur...

Scientists reveal 2016 to be a fake year

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It has been established by scientists at Rochdale Community University that 2016 was the result of an illegal artificial intelligence experiment.  Herr Dr Professor Doktor...

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