Men around the world have confirmed that it’s not Christmas until they have seen either a German terrorist or a half naked prostitute fall from the window of a sksyscraper.

“It’s a close run thing really.” Dave Bloke from Rochdale told The Rochdale Herald. “My wife seems to think it’s Christmas when we put the Christmas Tree up.”

“I reckon it doesn’t really start until I see Alan Rickman fall out of a window while I eat a mince pie and hum Let it Snow.”

“Who else thinks about Amanda’s Hunsacker’s boobs when they hear Jingle Bell Rock?”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.