Chilcott’s Trojan War Report ready in the next few days

Sir John Chilcott has announced his long overdue enquiry into the Trojan War could be ready "within a matter of days". The report, long overdue...

Citizen’s arrest powers updated to include summary execution

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Put your hands on the car and get ready to die. Home Secretary Amber Rudd confirmed today that the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE)...
Rochdale-missile-launch.jpg

Rochdale’s secret Nuclear Past REVEALED

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Shock revelations have shaken Rochdale to its very core as documents from the cold war have been declassified, revealing that the 7 sisters were...
Angry Man Christmas

Man adamant he wanted nowt for Christmas now angry and petulant he got what...

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An angry Rochdale man who swore to friends and relatives he wanted nothing except "maybe a skip" for all the stuff he already owns...

May Presented With Mirror After Body Shaming Corbyn

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Know Thyself, a charity dedicated to helping older people come to terms with physical changes, is to present Theresa May with a full length...

Prince Philip to be dismantled following cladding inspection failure

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HRH the Duke Of Edinburgh to be decommissioned and scrapped after failing Health and Safety tests. Sad scenes at Buckingham Palace today as Prince Philip...
Scientists

Scientists confirm that builder’s tea is just tea

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A team of scientists from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that builder's tea is, in fact, just tea. Clarence Tetley,...

Coronavirus maybe more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith warns Government

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The Government is warning that Coronavirus could be more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith. The warning comes as the number of cases in Britain...

Chilcot stuns world with news that Pope is catholic

Sir John Chilcot has stunned the world by stating again that the Pope is catholic and so it seems is Britain's greatest wartime leader...
David Davis

David Davis-Brexit Speech in full

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In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
Jacob Rees Mogg

Scary brexiteer “Mogo” revealed to be a hoax

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Jacob Rees-Mogg,known to the internet as "Mogo",the scary haunted Victorian doll,has been revealed to be a hoax. Pictures of Mogo have been popping up on...

Rochdale Herald Reporter groomed in ‘Muslim No-Go Area’.

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Our South Yorkshire correspondent Sebastian Wiesel recounts his experience of yesterday morning. "I was walking round Sheffield antiques quarter this morning, looking for a place...

Prince Philip is ‘perfectly fine’ Palace assures public

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HRH Prince Philip was straight back to work today insulting foreigners just three days after being released from hospital.  Palace officials were quick to point...

Tate & Lyle sponsor cabinet meetings

After what critics are calling a feeble effort to tackle childhood obesity the government is now in hot water again as it transpired that...

Man who forgot to take smartphone to loo with him makes full recovery

A bloke who forgot to take his iPhone to the toilet with him this morning has made a “complete” recovery following “breakthrough” treatment with...

Tory Party pledges to attack pot holes now it has defeated the disabled

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The Tory Party has declared victory in its war against the disabled and announced it will re-deploy its resources in a war on pot...

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