Scientists confirm tea tastes better when somebody else makes it
Researchers from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that tea tastes loads better when somebody else has made it.
Maurice Tips,...
Prince Philip deemed fit to work after ATOS work capability assessment
Prince Philip has today gone under the knife for surgery on his dodgy hip.
However 30 minutes later he was deemed fit to work in an...
Scottish Windfarm to re-open after summer recess
Nicola Sturgeon is to give a massive boost to renewable energy later today by droning on about the "way forward for Scotland" and as...
Stephen Fry forced to deny writing tomorrow’s Queen Speech
Rumours are circulating within Westminster village regarding tomorrow's Queen's Speech. In order for it to be the unmistakable work of comedy everyone expects, Downing Street...
We survived Bubonic plague so we’ll probably survive Brexit, Government assures Britain
The Government has released advice on what to do in the event of a 'no-deal' Brexit. The advice has the catchy strap line, "No-deal,...
Queen announces Prince Harry will become King of the USA following wedding to Meghan...
The Queen has announced that she exercise her right to crown Prince Harry and Meghan Markle King and Queen of the USA.
During the announcement...
Monster fatberg found in Boris Johnson’s head
A monster fatberg the size of two double decker buses has been found inside the head of rotund foreign secretary Boris Johnson, Trev Panning,...
New royal baby to be called Mohammed and raised gender neutral
The Duchess of Sussex Megan Markle has today given birth to a healthy child after a quick labour.
Prince Harry is reported as delighted, as...
Defiant Brit resumes place in queue
Stuart Anderson, has resumed his place in the Borough Market cheese stall queue.
Anderson, 34, told the Herald that he was going to a dinner...
Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
People urged to collect this year’s autumn leaves for currency post apocalypse
The Home Office has issued advice to the nation’s gardeners this year that they should be storing this year’s autumn leaves for use as...
Internet expert reveals Roman Empire was predominantly black
You heard it here last. Internet expert in everything and porn enthusiast @JailbaitPlanet has scandalised so called “experts” and “professional historians” by revealing in a...
3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again.
Despite months of...
Private rail company owner and Blairite totally unbiased about Traingate
Lord Sir Baron Richard Branson said today that claims that he has it in for rail nationalisation enthusiast Jeremy Corbyn are unfounded.
The gazillionaire, famous...
A quick break from satire
Last week there was a rather big election in the USA. The supporters of the losing candidate have spent every waking moment since, it...
Two kids remember something – proves some hippy shit totally
With all the scientific rigour of a hippy Merlin with a bone through his nose, the BBC headlines recently included the assertion that the...




















































