New EU regulations will require all new houses to have Toulouse
Flush from the success of Brexit, the EU Commission has been swift to demonstrate what the future looks like without a good hard Brit. ...
Quentin Letts launches #StopFundingReasonableness campaign
Quentin Letts, which is a name you may have heard, without actually knowing what it is, is apparently a man, and not an upper...
Local journalist creates entire article from on line forum comments.
A journalist at a Sheffield local newspaper has admitted that an entire article published in Friday's edition of the Sheffield Councilpleaser was constructed entirely...
Racism cured after white people put black face on their social media accounts
We are pleased to report that racial prejudice worldwide has been solved by white people blacking up their social media accounts. From your mum's...
I just want things to be the colour they were before, admits Brexiteer
Icon, n. A person or thing regarded as a representative symbol
"'Back and Blue - Brits will get their iconic dark blue passports back after...
Army called in to Burnley find ‘riot’ just sale at Farmfoods
The British Army was deployed in Burnley town centre earlier today to quell civil unrest apparently taking place in the city's popular shopping district.
Army...
Wetherspoons to rebrand as “Special Circle of Hell”
Pub chain Wetherspoons is to re-brand as the Special Circle of Hell following an endorsement by EU President Donald Tusk.
A spokesman for the company...
Move to rename Oldham as Oldtofu welcomed by militant vegans
The town of Oldham, Greater Mancashire, has been praised by vegan activists, hipsters and liberal snowflakes alike for taking the progressive move of removing...
Theresa May refuses to attend the General Election
After appointing her recently bereaved Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, to take
flack from 'the most left wing audience since a Stalin rally' - Daily Mail,
in...
Ruins of city unearthed by earthquake “just Hull” archaeologists told
Excitement in the archaeological world this weekend turned to bitter disappointment after archaeologists discovered the ruins of a primitive civilisation on the Yorkshire cost...
Farage performs volte-face on Europe after Trump-May love in
Seven times unelected former UKIP leader Nigel Farage has announced he may be in favour of the UK's European Union membership after all.
In an...
Tears of remainers used to put out Saddleworth Moor fire
Lancashire Fire Brigade have announced they're considering using the tears of remainers to put out the flames on the top of Saddleworth Moor.
Fire Officer...
South Koreans and Londoners in agreement that it’s “grim up north”
South Koreans will similarly be asked to stand on the border with their own north and use megaphones to shout at their alienated relatives that they think they have it hard, they could try living in Rochdale.
Man adamant he wanted nowt for Christmas now angry and petulant he got what...
An angry Rochdale man who swore to friends and relatives he wanted nothing except "maybe a skip" for all the stuff he already owns...
Future election results to be based on pandemic exam model
Following the overwhelming success of the Department of Education's strategy of grading academic exam results based on teachers' predicted grades and previous attainment levels,...
Fears grow for BBC Explorer missing in Oldham
The alarm was raised today after BBC documentary maker and explorer Professor Robert Falcon failed to emerge from Oldham after missing his rendezvous with...
