Scientists confirm that builder’s tea is just tea
A team of scientists from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that builder's tea is, in fact, just tea.
Clarence Tetley,...
Daily Express readers warned to brace for worst winter in 5 billion years
The Daily Express has reported that Britain is to experience the worst winter for the last 5bn years.
John Muir, of Inexact weather forecasting said,...
Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month.
The Home Office has also announced that all...
Helen Mirren to impersonate the Queen during Trump state visit
The Rochdale Herald understands that award winning actress Helen Mirren will impersonate the Queen should President Trump's proposed state visit to the UK go...
Calling people a Black Bastard is a term of endearment, says Ryanair racist
A man who was filmed saying racist things to a black grandma on a Ryanair flight this week has said that calling her a...
Football team goes one point ahead in Premiership.
Fans of popular football team Chelsea Albion were agog with joy today when the team went one point ahead of arch rivals Liverpool Wanderers...
Angry northerner rises up against culture of Fake Brews
A Lancastrian man fed up with the culture of 'fake brews' currently sweeping the nation has took it upon himself to show the masses...
Gove cast as Tick-Tock in Rupert Murdoch’s adaption of ‘Peter Pan’
An all star cast is to appear in seasoned stage director Rupert Murdoch's new adaptation of the J. M. Barrie classic 'Peter Pan'.
Michael Gove...
After blowing 28 million pounds on Winter Olympics the UK grinds to halt after...
Peyongchang 2018 was the most successful Winter Olympics for team GB and just one day after the closing ceremony Britain has begun its annual...
Treasury announces British economy based on booze and barbeques
The Government has announced that the UK's economy is now based solely on beer and barbeques.
In a statement the Treasury said, "The sunny...
Barclays customer sent to Guantanamo after overdraft complaint
A Rochdale man has been kidnapped by US intelligence services and sent to Guantanamo Bay after he complained to his local Barclays Bank about...
Anti-Semetism claims are part of Jewish influenced media conspiracy, claims Momentum member
A Rochdale Momentum member has told us that claims of anti-Semetism made by Chief Rabbi Ephraim Mervis are proof that there is a media...
Citizen’s arrest powers updated to include summary execution
Put your hands on the car and get ready to die.
Home Secretary Amber Rudd confirmed today that the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE)...
Asking not to be felt up at work is hardly a takeover, sigh women
As several leading Princes amongst Men like Charles Moore of the Telegraph and pre-Prince frogs like Quentin Letts recommend women lighten up, share power...
Peter Andre to press Brexit Button
As part of her Key Note speech to the Conservative Party Conference today Theresa May is set to announce this explosive coup for the...
Bus drivers distraught they can’t lose shit when given a fiver due to increased...
Bus drivers distraught they can't lose their shit when given a fiver, due to increased ticket prices.
Up and down the country local bus drivers...
