A pretentious couple from Rochdale have installed another place to have a pooh in their house, for some reason.

Steve and Barbara Dickinson have revealed that they can now do a turd in their bedroom like really posh people for the bargain price of only £20,000.

“It really is amazing now that we have an en suite in our bedroom.”  Barbara told The Rochdale Herald.

“Steve used to have to walk an extra eleven feet to the bathroom on the landing before he could drop the kids off at the pool. Now he can do a dump within five feet of our bed.”

“Think of all the time he’ll save by not having to cover all that distance. If he needs the loo in the middle of the night though, he has to go use the one on the landing.”

“If he flushes the bog in the bedroom at 3am that would wake me right up.”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.