Neo Nazi

“If it wasn’t for Churchill you’d be speaking German” says man performing nazi salute...

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A man has told the Rochdale Herald that he's protecting the statue of Winston Churchill in Whitehall because, "You'd be speaking German if it...

Boris Upsets Sturgeon Over Calls for New Indyref

Boris Johnson today ran into further hot water, or perhaps hot oil, over comments responding to Nicola Sturgeon's view that only an Independent Scotland...
Sturgeon

Autumn 2022 “common sense date for IndyRef 4” says Sturgeon

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Scotland's first minister has said autumn 2018 would be a "common sense" date for a 4th independence referendum. Nicola Sturgeon continued to insist, however, that...

What time is it Mr Woolfe?

Steven Woolfe, a total barrister who serves as a legal adviser to hedge fund managers and bankers narrowly missed his chance to become replacement...

Fears 40% of millenials may never have tedious home improvement conversations

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There are fears that up to 40% of millennials may never be able to have tedious home improvement conversations. Fewer and fewer people are able...
Bob Marley

Bob Marley suspended from Labour Party over claims iron lions are from Zion

Scandal has hit the beleaguered former political party, the Labour Party, this morning after a kangaroo court voted to suspend the dead Rastafarian singer...
Shed fire

Fire at Burnley Art School causes pounds worth of damage

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Yesterday's fire at the Burnley School for the Arts has caused £500 worth of damage. Early indications are that the bus stop is irreparably...
Cross Eyed Man

The light shines out of my arse, says man who got toothpaste and Anusol...

8
Rochdale resident Des Spondent, 46, was getting ready for work one dark morning when the mix-up occurred. The sores in his mouth miraculously healed, and...

Man singing “Free Tommy Robinson” thought he was entering competition to meet him

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A man who spent yesterday in London singing "Free Tommy Robinson" has said he thought he was entering a competition to meet him. Dave Wild...
fox cubs

Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto

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Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban. This appears to be the result of him mishearing...

Prince Philip is ‘perfectly fine’ Palace assures public

18
HRH Prince Philip was straight back to work today insulting foreigners just three days after being released from hospital.  Palace officials were quick to point...
Cat

I’m unlikely to put up with your shit much longer, cat tells owner after...

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A 4 year old black and white cat from Twickenham has told its owner Steve that "It's pretty fucking unlikely that I will be...

May criticised for scheduling Queen’s speech on Day of Rage

1
After weeks of uncertainty tinged with tragedy, the hard right fanatical Tories have been hammering out a deal with the DUP, which will finally...

Edinburgh caught in grip of Calamine lotion shortage as midge season starts

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Insect repellent sold out today as the temperature north of the border rose above zero, Spring sprang and Edinburgh played host to the annual...

Town of Hamelin hire Anna Soubry to rid itself of Problem Gammons

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Hamelin Town Hall has announced today that they have struck a deal with Anna Soubry to end their problems with flocks of Gammons in...
Children Christmas Presents

Thank you for supporting Satire Aid – 26,000 presents worth £175,000

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The numbers are now in for Satire Aid's Big Fat Secret Santa appeal. Together the readers of The Rochdale Herald, NewsThump, Angry People in...

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