Farage Security Concern as Public learn sense can be knocked into UKIP MEP

Steven Woolfe, the UKIP MEP, is being hailed as a “Medical Miracle” after becoming the 1st person in history to have had sense knocked into him.
Theresa May (licence)

Scientists discover creature smaller than Theresa May’s credibility.

0
Biologists wielding enormous magnifying glasses today discovered a newt thought to be the world's smallest living thing. This infinitesimal being has been proved by scientists...
Michael Gove

Michael Gove to celebrate New Year’s Eve with simple meal of live mice and...

0
Michael Gove has confirmed that he will be spending New Year Eve at home for quiet night in with his eggs. The environment secretary has...

Government announce plans to build new homes for immigrants on Rockall

Yesterday, far off of anyone's radar and while the teacup storm over Jeremy Corbyn's recent train journey reached stratospheric new heights, the UK government...
For Sale Signs

You could always smother a grandparent for a house deposit, Banks advise first time...

First time buyers struggling to raise the funds for a house deposit are being advised to smother an elderly relative for the inheritance by...

Bloke who described himself as inspirational and entrepreneurial on CV definitely neither

A bloke’s glowing description of himself on his CV definitely does not bear any resemblance to observations of his personality, it has emerged. During a...
Christmas Tree Family

And now we watch it die, parents tell children after choosing Christmas tree

0
Families up and down the country are in the slow process of watching their Christmas trees die after putting them up in their living...
Chelsea Pensioner

Chelsea Pensioner breaks Paul Golding’s nose

0
Biffer bashed as Veteran rejects attempt to hijack Remembrance Sunday Remembrance Sunday is commemorated every year on the second Sunday of November to mark the...

Doubling homelessness through reduced spending on welfare is excellent value claim Tories

0
As the National Audit Office revealed that homelessness of all kinds has doubled over the past 6 years, a Tory spokesman has confirmed that...
BMW

BMW three series usage linked with being an unbearable bellend

0
A 25 year long study of the people who habitually buy and use BMW 3 series has concluded that they are usually "unbearable bellends." Previous...

School sex education classes to be replaced by Love Island

0
School sex education classes are rubbish and should be replaced by episodes of Love Island it has been decided. Justine Greening said, "Learning to draw...

Nuttall lost close personal election in Stoke

0
Tragedy stricken leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall (105), faced fresh disaster yesterday when he lost a close personal election in Stoke. "Everything was looking good,...

We survived Bubonic plague so we’ll probably survive Brexit, Government assures Britain

0
The Government has released advice on what to do in the event of a 'no-deal' Brexit. The advice has the catchy strap line, "No-deal,...

Woman captures the spirit of Christmas by screening calls, binge eating and watching Netflix.

0
Denise Dufite of Middleton has captured the spirit of Christmas by ignoring the twelfth phone call of the day. Instead of answering calls from...

Radical preacher Anjem Choudary Wins a Five-and-a-Half Year Contract to Radicalise UK Prison Population

0
The 49-year-old was today offered the position at the Old Bailey after an exhaustive selection process. Police say Choudary will now have a captive...
Union flag with "Brexit" ove it

“Go Back to where you came from!” -Say 1970’s

0
In a shock statement today the 1970's have told 2016 to go back to its own timeline where it belongs.  In July a third of...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts