Blitz Spirit redefined to mean allowing a foreign Government to choose your ambassador
The Oxford English Dictionary has announced that it is redefining the meaning of Blitz Spirit. The move comes a day after the British Government...
Man believes in equality because he has daughters
A man has confirmed today that he is “totally woke” on the issues facing women today, because he has made not just one, but...
DUP B.U.N.G. to be funded through NI contributions
British Unity Nationally Guaranteed
Treasury Minister Terry Axe announced today that British Unity Nationally Guaranteed (aka B.U.N.G.) payments will start shortly as part of delivering...
We must reverse historic mistake, says irreversible historic mistake
Everyone in the world looked at each other and asked "what the hell" yesterday after the temerity of a former political leader's comments on...
Home Office apologises for deporting ‘the wrong sort of brown people’
In an official statement released within the last few minutes, the Home office has apologised 'unreservedly' for deporting 'the wrong sort of brown people'.
The...
Marrying melanin maddens media more than molesting minors
As news broke that Harry and Meghan have decided to quit their jobs to spend less time with their family, the country braced itself...
Rupert Murdoch still on course to become Britain’s longest-serving Prime Minister
With only two days of campaigning left before the general election, polling suggests that Rupert Murdoch is still on course to become Britain’s longest-serving...
Rochdale Herald exclusive – Prince Andrew tells us about Princess Beatrice’s wedding
In a Rochdale Herald exclusive Prince Andrew tells us how the secret wedding of his daughter Beatrice went last week.
7am - Woken up by...
We’ll make a success of Brexit, says country where businesses can’t sell things for...
Britain has said that it's perfectly equipped to make a success of Brexit even though shops that sell things for a pound are closing.
Business...
Killer Ian Brady’s ashes shot into space, by most expensive means possible and paid...
Reports have been across all of the mainstream press today regarding the Moors murderer, Ian Brady’s remains being buried at sea.
A shock report...
NHS crisis averted after 33,500 nurses found down back of sofa
Whitehall: There has been widespread relief around the UK after reports that the deepening staffing crisis in the NHS has been averted after tens...
Council has enough grit
A council in the North of England is absolutely confident that this is the year that they have bought enough grit to salt the...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
Scotland to ban Smack for children
The Scottish government has confirmed that children will no longer be able to use Smack in Scotland.
The move would make the country the first...
Shock poll puts Bashar Assad ahead of May and other UK party leaders
The first opinion poll conducted since Prime Minister Theresa May called a snap general election for June 8th has delivered a shock result.
A staggering...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
