Michael McIntyre

Comic Relief to be just Michael McIntyre and a bunch of Russells in future

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The BBC announced today that all future Comic Relief events will simply be Michael McIntyre and people called Russell running around and doing observational...

Fears of bush fire on Saddleworth moor causing huge smoke cloud actually vaping Hipster

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For three days smoke has filled the skies above north Manchester as Saddleworth moor has been seemingly ablaze, leaving North Manchester covered in a...

Sun exposes Cable as Strawberry fool

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Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of...
Bank of England

Government promises next batch of fivers ‘will be halal’

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There was an outpouring of fury earlier this week from vegetarians, vegans and religious groups as it was revealed that our new £5 notes...

Piers Morgan to be face of ‘Free The Ballbag’ campaign

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Piers Morgan has been revealed as the new face of men's rights campaign 'Free the Ballbag'. Inspired by the feminist 'Free The Nipple' movement, the...

Scottish football fans to show solidarity with Colombia by snorting loads of cocaine

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Scottish football fans have said they will up their intake of cocaine this weekend in an effort to demonstrate their solidarity with the Colombian...
Lazy Cat

Catlike powers wasted on cats

According to research at the institute of institutes catlike powers are absolutely wasted on cats. Researchers have discovered that despite having incredible superpower like abilities...

Deer left shaken by run in with Prince 

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A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne. Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after...

Northern Expert finds London still full of wankers

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Professor Emeritus of Southern Studies at the University of Leeds, Joe Roots, confirmed in his opening lecture of the 2017/18 academic term that: “London is...
Tony Blair

We must reverse historic mistake, says irreversible historic mistake

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Everyone in the world looked at each other and asked "what the hell" yesterday after the temerity of a former political leader's comments on...
Remote pointing at TV

GCHQ Samsung smart TV hack reveals threat to UK

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WikiLeaks revelations that GCHQ has hacked into Samsung smart TV sets to turn them into listening devices has revealed some fascinating facts impacting on...
Sturgeon

‘It’s the Welsh we hate not the English’ claims SNP

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The Scottish National Party has released an official statement denying that their desire for Scottish independence is motivated by a historic mistrust of the...

American tourists Popeye cockup

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A group of American tourists are threatening to sue a Birmingham hotel , after claiming that the owners have exposed them to humiliation and...

Facebook servers crash after everyone announces they’re drinking Prosecco

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Facebook couldn't be logged into earlier today after millions of people updated their statuses with things like; "The Prosecco is open! You know what that...
Paul Nuttall

Paul Nuttall To Become Next Duke Of Edinburgh

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Paul Nuttall will be assuming the position of Duke of Edinburgh, following the retirement of Prince Philip, he has confirmed. “It’s the perfect job, really,”...
Kate and William

New royal baby to be called DIANA and raised as a GIRL

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Buckingham Palace has sought to quash rumours that the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are set to call their new baby boy 'Diana' and...

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