Northerner goes full day without talking about the weather
Storm Eleanor has battered the United Kingdom with wind of up to 100 miles power hour, damaging property, trees and causing storm risk warnings...
Working class couple getting married
A working class couple, Steven Dickinson and Barbara Stevenson, who don't own a string of polo ponies, are due to get married at a...
David Davis-Brexit Speech in full
In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out...
Mime artist finds way out of glass box
Mime artists across the world are silently applauding the first ever recorded occurrence of a mime artist breaking out of a glass box.
There was...
Man who once burnt a Pot Noodle looking forward to another night of shouting...
A man whose cooking skills don't extend beyond pressing the 'start' button on his microwave is looking forward to another night of shouting at...
Chris Grayling announces RAF to be replaced by the Russian Air Force
Chris Grayling has announced that the Royal Air Force will be disbanded and its responsibilities outsourced to the Russian Air Force.
Speaking from Ivan the...
Boris Johnson hits King of Spain on forehead with spoon after mistaking him for...
Britain and Spain are embroiled in a ferocious diplomatic incident after Boris Johnson hit King Felipe VI of Spain on the forehead with a...
Prince Philip in grim reaper racist remark gaffe
Hospital staff were apparently left flabbergasted at the Duke of Edinburgh's casually racist remarks during a recent impromptu visit by Death, the harvester of...
William and Catherine’s third child expected to hatch in April
Kensington palace said the breeding pair were “delighted” to be adding to their lounge and already have two hatchlings: Prince George, four, and his younger sister Charlotte, two.
First M25 user leaves Thatcher’s Hell road after 30 years
Albert J Bilsborough, 63, has finally left the M25 after 30 years, after also being amongst the first motorists to enter the hell road.
The...
‘It’s the Welsh we hate not the English’ claims SNP
The Scottish National Party has released an official statement denying that their desire for Scottish independence is motivated by a historic mistrust of the...
We’ll make a success of Brexit, says country where businesses can’t sell things for...
Britain has said that it's perfectly equipped to make a success of Brexit even though shops that sell things for a pound are closing.
Business...
We have no shares in Amazon as Yodel are delivering them, says Justin Welby
Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby has today explained that The Church of England doesn't actually have shares in Amazon as Yodel has never delivered...
Brexit Plan Turns Out To Be Just David Davis Bragging About His Massive Staff
The world waited with baited breath for David Davis' speech in which he was expected to reveal the government's plans for exiting the EU....
Rochdale man sues Ancestory.com after DNA test shows he’s 60% banana
A Rochdale resident has announced he's suing Ancestory.com after a DNA test showed he shares 60% of his DNA with a banana.
He's citing inaccuracies in the...
British man who can speak French to be burned as a witch
According to reports the British man who has learnt to speak a foreign language fluently is to be burnt at the stake on Tuesday.
Lord...
