MEGHAN AND PRINCE HARRY

FA cup cancelled due to Royal Wedding scheduling clash

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The Rochdale Herald has learned that the Football Association have taken the unprecedented step of cancelling the 2018 FA Cup final. The move comes after...
Working Class Couple

Working class couple getting married

A working class couple, Steven Dickinson and Barbara Stevenson, who don't own a string of polo ponies, are due to get married at a...
Tony Blair

Tony Blair has already earned more than you

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Tony Blair has already earned more than you will this year and it's only January. For those unfamiliar, Mr Blair is the most successful leader...

“Your dad is a horrible man”, says man yelling at child because he doesn’t...

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A middle aged man has today made another middle aged man aware that he doesn't like him by standing outside the man's home and...

Britons Now Incapable Of Making Any Decision Without A Referendum

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The majority of British people are now incapable of making a decision without first holding a referendum, according to a study published today. Researchers...

Blairite Entryism Not A Big Deal, Insist Blairites

It was revealed today that a Blairite peer, a hedge fund manager, several rich business types and a Liberal Democrat Lord were behind the...
Amber Rudd

I did get the memo, but I don’t know what’s in it because I...

Home Secretary Amber Rudd has admitted that she did actually get the memo about specific migrant removal targets, but was unable to read it...

The Shard ‘nearly finished’

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The Shard in London is nearing completion, according to developers. Once finished, it will stand at 310m and will be the tallest building in the...
Chris Grayling

Chris Grayling announces RAF to be replaced by the Russian Air Force

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Chris Grayling has announced that the Royal Air Force will be disbanded and its responsibilities outsourced to the Russian Air Force. Speaking from Ivan the...

Jeremy Corbyn was a Sugababe – fresh allegations rock Westminster

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Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn was under fresh scrutiny today after it was alleged he was once the fourth member of noughties pop sensations 'Sugababes'. Speaking...

Stop calling us liars, lying racist shitsticks tell Microsoft

The Daily Mail is calling for a web browser alert that tells readers that prolonged exposure to its website will turn them into completely...
M25

First M25 user leaves Thatcher’s Hell road after 30 years

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Albert J Bilsborough, 63, has finally left the M25 after 30 years, after also being amongst the first motorists to enter the hell road. The...
Mo Farah

QUEEN defends herself from MUSLIM IMMIGRANT with SWORD

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According to reports in the Daily Mail today the Queen has been forced to defend herself from a marauding Muslim immigrant with a sword. A...

Britain First blame Foreigner for it being Cold As Ice

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We don't care if you've heard this joke before, because for us, it Feels Like The First Time. Dirty White Boy fan club Britain First...

American tourists Popeye cockup

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A group of American tourists are threatening to sue a Birmingham hotel , after claiming that the owners have exposed them to humiliation and...

Duke of Edinburgh embroiled in food poisoning compensation scam

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The Duke of Edinburgh is reported to have become embroiled in a food poisoning compensation scam scandal today just hours after being discharged from...

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