Owen Smith Recognised in Tesco Express
In a massive boost for the right of The Labour Party, Owen Smith was spotted and recognised in a Tesco Express in Camden yesterday....
M&Ms Sharing packs to be renamed Who Are You To Judge Me packs
Chocolate mega-conglomerate Mars have confirmed they are renaming 'Share' packs to more accurately reflect their customers' selfish, secretive consumption style.
Advertising campaigns for the larger...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
Prince Andrew says he has no recollection of meeting Emily Maitlis or appearing on...
Prince Andrew has denied allegations that he met Emily Maitlis or even appeared on the TV show, Newsnight. Despite over 1 million people having...
Tit in Parliament in tits in Parliament row
Andrea Leadsom has found herself an unlikely ally in the UK's war on women and motherhood, Sammy Wilson MP.
Mr Wilson, the DUP MP for...
Sick Home Sec sacked?
Home Sec Diane Abbott has been off sick since cancelling her appearance on Woman's Hour yesterday but has she been sacked?
Jeremy Corbyn was giving...
Scone versus scone pronunciation debate hits 14th consecutive hour
It's National Cream Tea Day, which means across the nation the fine china is taken off the Welsh dresser and selections of finger sandwiches...
People that pull statues down to face different level of justice to people that...
The Government has confirmed that the people that pulled a statue down over the weekend will face a different level of justice to those...
Unemployed mother on benefits knocked up AGAIN
It's all over social media that an unemployed mother on state benefits, who already has two kids, is knocked up yet again.
Boris not offensive, simply misunderstood – insists Boris
Posh fop-headed press gob and Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson has defended the countless insults and faux pas he has made by claiming that each...
Olympic Bobsled team advised not to drive to work because it’s a bit slippery...
After celebrating the amazing success of Team GB at the Winter Games, winning 5 medals at a cost of only £28 million, the whole...
Put a bloody jumper on if you’re cold we’re not made of money, Philip...
“Put a jumper on and stop fiddling with the blasted thermostat, I just got it right. If you’re that blinking cold go and walk some of those wretched dogs you insist on keeping. And I’m not talking about the Fergie's sprogs!”
Racism cured after white people put black face on their social media accounts
We are pleased to report that racial prejudice worldwide has been solved by white people blacking up their social media accounts. From your mum's...
John Lewis Christmas advert shows puppy being fed into blender
Retailer John Lewis has released its Christmas advert for 2017 which shows a cute puppy being fed into an industrial strength blender.
The eagerly anticipated...
Green Cross Code Man killed in hit and run tragedy
The Green Cross Code Man has been killed in Rochdale in a terribly ironic tragedy involving a silent Ocado electric delivery van and a mobile phone.
Theresa May announces Leyland Daf to build next generation Brexit-fighter in Preston
Theresa May has announced that the UK will be leaving the Eurofighter Programme immediately. BAE Systems will be closing its Eurofighter factory in the...
