Rees-Mogg reveals time travel is workable Irish border solution
Jacob Rees-Mogg has revealed that the Irish border issue can be easily and practically solved using time travel.
Rees-Mogg revealed the plan today in a...
New EU regulations will require all new houses to have Toulouse
Flush from the success of Brexit, the EU Commission has been swift to demonstrate what the future looks like without a good hard Brit. ...
Patio chair braces himself for Storm Brian
A patio chair in Milnrow is bracing himself for an absolutely terrible few days after news that yet another storm with high winds is...
Home Office apologises for deporting ‘the wrong sort of brown people’
In an official statement released within the last few minutes, the Home office has apologised 'unreservedly' for deporting 'the wrong sort of brown people'.
The...
Town centre with a load of sheds in it having some sort of Christmas...
A town in the north west has signalled that it is having a Christmas market by erecting several sheds and a large tent in...
DUP B.U.N.G. to be funded through NI contributions
British Unity Nationally Guaranteed
Treasury Minister Terry Axe announced today that British Unity Nationally Guaranteed (aka B.U.N.G.) payments will start shortly as part of delivering...
Scientists confirm that builder’s tea is just tea
A team of scientists from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that builder's tea is, in fact, just tea.
Clarence Tetley,...
Farage to become economic migrant.
Sources close to the MEP, would be ambassador and professional Admiral Ackbar lookalike Nigel Farage, say he is close to moving the the USA.
Apparently...
Cute dog is a savage little shit
A survey of very cute little dogs has discovered that almost 99.9% of them are in fact savage little bastards.
The survey which was carried...
Esther McVey resigns to spend more time with other people’s families
Esther McVey, a former television presenter and now a falling star in Westminster, relishes her career - but admits to no regrets in her...
New Carling advert just footage of Wayne Rooney trying to remember driving home
A new advertising campaign for Carling beer will allegedly feature Wayne Rooney trying to remember driving home.
The campaign has come in for criticism from...
UKIP Conspiracy theorists claim Paul Nuttall is being erased from history
UKIP leader, Paul Nuttall PhD, is concerned that he is being erased from history by a shadowy group of leftist and liberal media conspirators.
He recently had to...
Annual day of disappointment for fathers receiving crap presents
It's Father's Day and an annual day of depression for men across the nation as fathers are expected to sit, smile and feign appreciation...
Tolkein With Tits set to dominate office conversations as Game of Thrones returns
As the umpteenth series of the godawful fantasy franchise "Game of Thrones" is due to air on Murdoch-vision this week, those with more refined...
BBC expose puts police behind Barr’s
A shock revelation on BBC Breakfast this morning revealed that British police forces are using fizzy drink to subdue suspects.
The footage was taken from...
Rochdale IT Worker Deletes Human Rights Act
Albert Fudge, a Rochdale based web designer employed by the Conservative Party- has accidentally deleted the European Human Rights Act.
The tech boffin was asked...
