Government re-brands NHS as Notional Health Service
The government has announced plans to re-brand the National Health Service as the Notional Health Service.
Jeremy Hunt MP, Secretary of State for Health, is...
Morrissey spends days in bed
Tragic news has reached us here at The Rochdale Herald for all lovers of the morbid mopheaded muso and former front man of The...
NHS study shows people with two legs run greater risk of jogging injuries
People with two legs run a greater risk of suffering injuries while jogging or running, a new report published Friday by the NHS shows.
According...
Smallbridge Flats Man Convinced Pigeon Likes to Watch him Hoover Naked
While spending a good portion of his weekly income on the Euromillions, Mr. Garry Lee Shaw complained about the fifth or even sixth time...
One in four NHS hospitals have turned to STRIPPING to make ends meet
Almost a quarter of the nation's hospitals have turned to stripping to make up for funding shortfalls, according to a new report.
Commissioned by a...
Lovely Grandma catches racism after wiping bottom on Daily Mail
A lovely old grandma who contracted racism during a trip to Burnley last week is in a "serious condition" after being admitted to an...
NHS gift vouchers to become nation’s favourite christmas stocking fillers
People up and down the country will be able to show their loved ones how much they care by buying gift vouchers for NHS...
Fat Fighters launches gold leaf ‘Sin Free’ range
Fat Fighters has introduced a new range gold leaf coated products to help gullible fatties spend more money and lose even more weight. The company...
Government digital service actually still analogue
The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...
London Motorists furious that cyclists lives might be saved
London drivers are currently outraged at London mayor Sadiq Khan's plans to reduce cyclists deaths.
"Over half of cyclist deaths in the capital involve construction...
Singing Covid19 to the tune of Come On Eileen makes Coronavirus less intimidating says...
In an effort to stem growing panic, the WHO has released new advice for those concerned about Coronavirus.
Virologist Dr Kevin McRowland released the following...
Husband fails to avoid loaded question
A Rochdale man is currently receiving counselling and treatment for first-degree burns after failing to give the correct answer to a blatantly loaded question...
Increase in breast injuries as Brexit voters admit to feeling right tits
The number of women reporting breast injuries has increased dramatically since June 2016, according to Dr Feltham Bubiz, head of Unspeakable Female Problems at Rochdale General...
Hospital waiting times longest ever as people queue to abuse Boris Johnson
"Waiting times for the NHS in England are the longest ever and it's because people are waiting so they can abuse Boris Johnson."
Rochdale resident...
Despite Brexit vote UK National Sperm Bank to close due to wanker shortage
Despite all evidence to the contrary the U.K. Is suffering from a profound wanker shortage after the National Sperm Bank recruited only seven wankers in two years.
Racists awarded PIP’s under new mental health provisions
Penny Mordor MP, Secretary of State for Disabled People, Work and Health announced this morning wide ranging changes to the qualification criteria for PIP (Personal Independence...


















































