Diabetes sufferers celebrate reduced risk with ‘messy weekend’
The news that top scientists have established that people who drink alcohol more regularly are less likely to develop diabetes.
The results found that...
Crossfit cult ‘survivor’ makes full recovery after being rescued
A former member of the cult of Crossfit, Steve ‘Tits’ Day, has spoken for the first time having made a full recovery from his formerly...
Jeremy Hunt Pictures Issued To Stop People Choking
A new cure has been unveiled by the NHS to stop people choking - looking at pictures of Jeremy Hunt.
This seemingly controversial move actually...
IMPORTANT ADVICE TO STOP SPREAD OF VIRUS
The Rochdale Herald would like to pass on advice regarding the nasty viral infection which has reared its ugly head in the UK recently.
Please...
Specialists called in after Yorkshireman with Aussie flu says “G’day mate”
A Yorkshire man has been rushed to hospital after it was suspected he had the most serious strain of the Aussie flu virus known...
Emergency services overwhelmed after public blinded by David Dimbleby’s tie
Emergency Services are at the point of absolute collapse this evening after millions tuned in to the BBC to watch the exit polls this evening...
Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours
Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...
Attention seeker Brian Harvey arrested after sending himself abusive Tweets
Former East 17 Band member and serial own foot shooter Brian Harvey is said to be in trouble with the police over alleged malicious...
20 a day smoker worried 5G mast will give him cancer
A Bolton man says he fears that 5 aside football pitch flood light is actually a secret 5G mast that will cause him to...
Government re-brands NHS as Notional Health Service
The government has announced plans to re-brand the National Health Service as the Notional Health Service.
Jeremy Hunt MP, Secretary of State for Health, is...
Smallbridge Flats Man Convinced Pigeon Likes to Watch him Hoover Naked
While spending a good portion of his weekly income on the Euromillions, Mr. Garry Lee Shaw complained about the fifth or even sixth time...
Naked gym guy insists “I’m just high on life”
Reports are circulating that a middle aged man stripped stark bollock naked last night at local budget gym, LoveMuscle.
Eyewitnesses claim he was beating his...
Government isn’t spending enough on health, says chain-smoking binge-drinker who doesn’t go to gym
An overweight chain-smoking binge-drinker who never does any exercise has confirmed that this government isn't spending enough money on ensuring that his health care...
Women seeking cosmetic surgery to make their genitals look like Michael Gove
The Labia Party have announced new plans to make vaginal cosmetic surgery available on the NHS. The announcement follows news that millions of women...
World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale.
One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...
Disaster as it’s revealed Government only has enough Care badges for 1 in 5...
Undercover reporters for The Rochdale Herald have discovered that the Government only has enough "Care" badges for 1 in 5 care workers as part...
