Health

The underfunding and imminent collapse of the NHS is due to a little known government policy on the zombie apocalypse sources have revealed. Zombiepreppers in the UK were delighted this week when Jeremy Hunt...

The spokesman for the Royal College of Dental Surgeons has issued a warning not to feed sweets to starving children.

Metrosexuals all over the country were overcome with delight today as Snake Oil salesmen L'Oreal, released an new line of grooming products for men in a star studded press conference. The jackboot of pressure placed...

Unelected Prime Minister and part time Zelda impersonator has managed to anger both equalities protesters and AIDS awareness groups with her latest gaffe. Mrs May has announced a 300% pay rise for all civil servants...

Chris Witty has shocked fans around the world after signing a multi-million pound, multi-decade deal to become the new face of Andrex bog roll. The 54 year old epidemiologist, Chief Medical Officer and toilet roll...

There were grave concerns for Katie Hopkins today when the massive chip she uses as a shoulder deepened and caused her arm to calve from the giant ice shelf that is the rest of...

Over a million NHS staff including front line nurses and paramedics are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.

Since moving to London, St Cuthbert's alumnus Ben Green has prided himself on, in his own words, "spreading his chutney round Putney".  Claiming to have graduated one of Rochdale's leading Catholic schools, he has...

A brainchild policy of Health Secretary, Jeremy Hunt, has been leaked from the Conservative General Election Manifesto. The policy will outline plans to increase doctor numbers whilst simultaneously cutting costs. After a Conservative election win, would be doctors...

Autism, a neurological developmental disorder, is definitely probably worse than polio, rubella and a host of other preventable diseases all but eradicated in the western world, says a "professor" of pro-disease studies. Ulysses Jennicks, of...

A lovely old grandma who contracted racism during a trip to Burnley last week is in a "serious condition" after being admitted to an isolation unit in Rochdale. NHS Rochdale has confirmed that the racism...

The Conservative Party has released its newest manifesto pledge to increase A&E floor space in the 40 hospitals they are definitely not building, as well as ensuring 50,000 more coats for sick children to...

Our Herald undercover reporter uncovers the sinister side of the illegal Kensington salad trade. It’s 2 a.m. and I’m standing outside an all-night coffee shop in London’s Kensington High Street, waiting, as Lou Reed so...

A new cure has been unveiled by the NHS to stop people choking - looking at pictures of Jeremy Hunt. This seemingly controversial move actually has a firm basis in scientific fact. Dr Flo Ofair...

Emergency Services are at the point of absolute collapse this evening after millions tuned in to the BBC to watch the exit polls this evening without wearing protective eyewear and were blinded by David Dimbleby's...

The Rochdale Herald would like to pass on advice regarding the nasty viral infection which has reared its ugly head in the UK recently. Please read this information and act accordingly. DO NOT IGNORE this...