NHS declares tap water is much more cost effective than homeopathy

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The NHS has declared that it's probably a better use of money to invest in tap water than provide homeopathy provision. NHS spokesperson Dr Gary...

World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field

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World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale. One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...

NHS hospitals to sell postcards to capitalise on booming health tourism

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The Department of Health issued a press release this morning announcing that all NHS hospitals were to begin retailing postcards in order to capitalise...
Doctor Who

New Doctor Who to charge for consultations according to Jeremy Hunt

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As science fiction fans eagerly await the announcement from the BBC about the identity of the umpteenth actor to play the timelord, The Rochdale...
Doctor and Child

Autism definitely probably worse than polio, says anti-vax “professor”

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Autism, a neurological developmental disorder, is definitely probably worse than polio, rubella and a host of other preventable diseases all but eradicated in the...

Littlest Hobo declared fit for work by ATOS

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Everyone remembers getting a little teary to the Littlest Hobo, don’t they? Each episode he’d make some friends and then leave, just as they were...
anti-vaxxer

My kids weren’t vaccinated and the one who didn’t die is okay says anti-vaxxer

45
Tracy O'Daffy of Middleton is heading a campaign to raise awareness of the dangers of vaccination throughout the Rochdale area. Tracy has been a long...
Diabetes

Diabetes sufferers celebrate reduced risk with ‘messy weekend’

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The news that top scientists have established that people who drink alcohol more regularly are less likely to develop diabetes. The results found that...

Evil Tory bastards sign off on pay increase for 1.3 million NHS workers

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Over a million NHS staff including front line nurses and paramedics are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.
Vegetables

Vegetables ‘have feelings too’ top scientists discover

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Happy raspberries, disappointed carrots and furious parsnips may not be the stuff of fairy tales, top food scientists have shown. Researchers were observing the effect...

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