Toxic Sign

Trump gives a shot in the arm to 2020 Darwin Awards

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President Donald Trump has thrown an unexpected and much appreciated lifeline to the 2020 Darwin Awards. The well-known website which describes itself as  a "salute...

Thousands of Leave voters dead after do not drink labels removed from bottles of...

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Several hundred thousand leave voters have died from drinking bleach in the last few days after labels, required under EU health and safety rules,...

Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours

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Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...

Thousands come together for eye testing

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Thousands of people have come together in the name of ophthalmic health this weekend. Many even brought their own testing kits. One attendee told us,...
British Homeopath

British Homeopathy Association to strike over watered down labelling

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The British Homeopathy Association has announced a planned strike over government plans to label their medication as being ‘useless’. The head of the British Homeopathic Association...
Hospital

Lovely Grandma catches racism after wiping bottom on Daily Mail

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A lovely old grandma who contracted racism during a trip to Burnley last week is in a "serious condition" after being admitted to an...

Mordor agrees below inflation pay rise for Hobbits

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Over a million Hobbits across The Shire including front line ring bearers and turnip farmers are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.
Drug paraphernalia

Is Bank of England endangering health of cocaine users

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A casual cocaine user from Rochdale has accused the Bank of England of intentionally trying to injure and poison him with the new fiver. Nathan...
Doctors

You can’t lock up surgeons for behaving like sociopaths, we’d have none left rules...

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The NHS breathed a deep sigh of relief today after Judge Ian Pringle QC ruled that you can't send surgeons to prison just for behaving like coked up sociopaths.

NHS Complimentary Medicine Services near collapse

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The Emergency Services and NHS Trusts in London & the South East areas are reported to be within 24 hours of collapse. Since the vote...

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