The Government is warning that Coronavirus could be more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith. The warning comes as the number of cases in Britain doubled to 8.

A spokesman said, “When discussing the deadliness of a virus it’s always best to use a comparison people are familiar with. That’s why we want to warn the people that this virus could turn out to be deadlier than Iain Duncan Smith. We hope the public take every precaution and report any symptoms to their nearest health centre.”

The Government has also changed their advice and are recommending British people exercise full racism against Chinese people. A spokesman said, “This virus is spread by sneezing. If you don’t get sneezed on by a Chinese person then you’ll be fine. That’s why we’re recommending people be as racist as possible to Chinese people. Clearly nobody else could get this.”

Elsewhere, the Chinese media has reported that it’s state broadcaster, CTV, has cancelled the new series of The Masked Singer after one contestant nearly caused a riot.

Fact checked by Snopes; Plagiarised by Andrew Neil; Nancy Sinatra's favourite Rochdale satirist; sued by Chris Froome and winner of the 1922 Nobel Prize for Chemistry.* *Not all of these necessarily true.