New male grooming products launched
Metrosexuals all over the country were overcome with delight today as Snake Oil salesmen L'Oreal, released an new line of grooming products for men...
Specialists called in after Yorkshireman with Aussie flu says “G’day mate”
A Yorkshire man has been rushed to hospital after it was suspected he had the most serious strain of the Aussie flu virus known...
Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours
Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...
The man from Del Monte in critical condition with scurvy
80's TV ad star and renowned juice producer, Derek Monte, was rushed to hospital yesterday and immediately diagnosed with scurvy, a debilitating illness caused...
Government isn’t spending enough on health, says chain-smoking binge-drinker who doesn’t go to gym
An overweight chain-smoking binge-drinker who never does any exercise has confirmed that this government isn't spending enough money on ensuring that his health care...
Racists awarded PIP’s under new mental health provisions
Penny Mordor MP, Secretary of State for Disabled People, Work and Health announced this morning wide ranging changes to the qualification criteria for PIP (Personal Independence...
UK obesity epidemic to be tackled by driving the Coca-Cola truck through towns and...
Coca Cola have announced that the driver of their self-proclaimed ‘traditional’ Christmas Truck has been instructed to keep moving through the UK towns and...
Nurses threaten to go on saving lives if public sector pay cap isn’t removed
Nurses have upped the ante with the Government by sensationally threatening to continue to act in a professional fashion in their ongoing dispute over...
Public Health Warning-Skittles Ban comes into effect.
The popular sweets Skittles will today be banned from sale all across the world after news has emerged that just 3 of them contain...
Fat Fighters launches gold leaf ‘Sin Free’ range
Fat Fighters has introduced a new range gold leaf coated products to help gullible fatties spend more money and lose even more weight. The company...
Crossfit cult ‘survivor’ makes full recovery after being rescued
A former member of the cult of Crossfit, Steve ‘Tits’ Day, has spoken for the first time having made a full recovery from his formerly...
NHS to be shut down so sick people can get used to feeling poorly
In a shock move Sunday UK chancellor Philip Hammond, announced that his first budget on Wednesday will outline plans for a complete end to...
Celebrities reveal best detox is to take money from idiots
Celebrities have allegedly been explaining how the best detox is to take money from idiots.
In a statement celebrity food blogger Andrew Coconut Fox said,...
Doctor of Medicine degree to be replaced with Google
A brainchild policy of Health Secretary, Jeremy Hunt, has been leaked from the Conservative General Election Manifesto.
The policy will outline plans to increase doctor numbers...
Doctors desperately hoping Rees Mogg falls ill
Following Jacob Rees-Mogg's bullying tirade on a doctor who dared challenge his smug assertions on talk radio, many people have challenged the pusillanimous human...
Evil Tory bastards sign off on pay increase for 1.3 million NHS workers
Over a million NHS staff including front line nurses and paramedics are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.
