homeopath

NHS increase Homeopathy budget by 0.0000001%

Campaigners are thrilled after their campaign to reverse a decision by NHS bosses to no longer prescribe homeopathy on the NHS. After winning the right...

Its not Lupus.

0
Hypochondriacs around the UK were said to be giddy with the excitement at the prospect of a new NHS website that will encourage them...
Angry Man

Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend

0
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning. As millions of us check up on the...
Diabetes

Diabetes sufferers celebrate reduced risk with ‘messy weekend’

0
The news that top scientists have established that people who drink alcohol more regularly are less likely to develop diabetes. The results found that...
E-Cigarette

E-Cigarettes create ‘Super Organ’

0
E-Cigarettes cause your internal organs to fuse together creating one large 'super organ' that later bursts, scientists have found. The two-year study, which followed heavy users of the...

Crossfit cult ‘survivor’ makes full recovery after being rescued

9
A former member of the cult of Crossfit, Steve ‘Tits’ Day, has spoken for the first time having made a full recovery from his formerly...

Jeremy Hunt to introduce Pay Per View Patient Records

0
NHS officials have confirmed reports that health minister Jeremy Hunt has been hacked. "Since his initial appointment as health minister in 2012 we have been working on...

UKIP Politician selling more than just political lies

0
Welsh UKIPper, Andrew “IQ not very” Haigh doesn't just sell bullshit through his party, it transpires. The national organiser for Wales also sells utter bollocks...

British Public shocked to learn Pizza and San Miguel not Mediterranean Diet

0
Rochdalians are being reminded today that having a deep pan 16 inch spicy meat special doesn't count as following a Mediterranean diet- even if...
analogue

Government digital service actually still analogue

1
The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...
Theresa May

Theresa May’s Rituals

0
"Theresa May is signalling distress." Dr. Maca Damia comments, viewing photos of the Prime Minister kneeling by the road just inside Wales. "Do you see...

Dentist warns that Halloween treats ages teeth of refugees

0
The spokesman for the Royal College of Dental Surgeons has issued a warning not to feed sweets to starving children.
Michael Gove

Women seeking cosmetic surgery to make their genitals look like Michael Gove

25
The Labia Party have announced new plans to make vaginal cosmetic surgery available on the NHS. The announcement follows news that millions of women...

NHS recruit Clippit the Paperclip to defend against hackers. 

0
NHS boffins have rolled out the big guns this week, spending over half of their £42.50 IT budget on futuristic anti-virus software. ? "We needed someone...
Doctor Who

New Doctor Who to charge for consultations according to Jeremy Hunt

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As science fiction fans eagerly await the announcement from the BBC about the identity of the umpteenth actor to play the timelord, The Rochdale...
Doctors

Increase in breast injuries as Brexit voters admit to feeling right tits

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The number of women reporting breast injuries has increased dramatically since June 2016, according to Dr Feltham Bubiz, head of Unspeakable Female Problems at Rochdale General...

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