Football Riot

Belgian football riot shows EU is hungry for UK exports says Liam Fox

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A football riot at a Belgian football match between Anderlecht and Club Brugge demonstrates the hunger for British exports according to Liam Fox. In a...

Weight lifting record smashed at Vegan Olympics as competitor lifts his arms above head

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Records have been tumbling all week at the very first running of The Vegan Olympics taking place in Turkey. The first big record smashed was...

Surprise as West Ham Fan runs 50 yards on pitch without stopping for fag...

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It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics. There was shock and surprise as a West Ham...

Winter Olympics shock after allegations that many of the events are just an elaborate...

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Brenda "Brenda" Williamson, a Rochdale woman shortlisted for the UK Curling team but ultimately dropped from the squad, today broke ranks and claimed that...

ISIS applies for FIFA membership

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The murderous psychopathic caliphate known as ISIS has applied to join the world football governing body, FIFA.  In a surprise move, they hope to be...

Ben Stokes argues fighting in street a necessary part of training to tour Australia.

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All-rounder and England vice-captain Ben Stokes may have put his part in England's ashes tour in jeopardy following his arrest in the early hours...
Arsene Wenger

Wenger at wits end as he cannot figure out how to get sack from...

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Arsene Wenger was left frustrated after the end of a tumultuous week which saw Arsenal lose twice against Manchester city and rounded off by...

British public excited by boxing match between two men they wouldn’t want to move...

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British boxing fans spent much of the night anticipating and then watching a bout between black fighter Deontay Wilder and half-Irish gypsy Tyson Fury. Fight...

‘My dour Scots personality is actually a total fanny magnet’ claims Andy Murray

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Racquetball superstar Andy Murray today spoke of how his charisma-free personality brings all the girls to his yard. Murray, whose public speaking manner is so...

Rochdale Reds watch Man Utd forge ahead with Brexit plan

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Members of the Rochdale Reds Man Utd supporters association may ask the High Court to step in over Jose Mourinho's apparent Brexit plans. United manager...

Scottish football team celebrates getting through to the last 16

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The Scottish football team is celebrating getting through to the last sixteen; of a golf tournament. Speaking from the Roving Sands Golf Course in Marbella,...

Poppies outraged at being hijacked by intolerable, out of touch band of Nationalists.

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The prima-donna XI, also known as the England National football team, have confirmed that they will take to the pitch against Germany this Friday,...

The Rochdale Herald’s Top Ten Tips for Real Supporters and True Football Fans

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In honour of signing world famous football man Neville Southall to the Rochdale Herald, here are our top ten tips for real supporters and...
Football

Donald Trump congratulates Rochdale AFC on winning Superbowl

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POTATUS, Donald Trump telephoned and congratulated Rochdale AFC on winning the Superbowl on Sunday night. Much to the surprise of club officials. A club spokesman...

Queen gives blessing for Meghan to marry Prince Harry

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The Queen has signalled her approval for Meghan Markle to marry Prince Harry Kane. Despite her recent wedding to that "Bastard" (sic) ginger grandson of...

Muslims Infiltrate Ranks of Top British Sports Teams

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Statisticians today pointed to a 25% increase in Muslims appearing among the top four run scorers in the England cricket team.  "It appears the sneaky...

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