Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal
Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer.
Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...
House of Commons to close for week to hold UK Cat Herding Championships
Following months of political turmoil in the UK and the shining example of incompetence that is the brexit negotiations, the political landscape is now...
Canoeist wins Olympic Gold for canoeing
A canoeist fulfilled a lifetime's ambition last night after winning Olympic Gold for Britain in Rio.
The Rochdale Herald would like to congratulate the canoeist...
Corbyn hires Arsene Wenger as Labour Manager
It appears that politics will see a tornado of excitement and enthusiasm as Jeremy Corbyn is planning to bring in the current Arsenal manager...
Thousands dead in Daily Mail Olympics tragedy
Thousands of Daily Mail readers are dead today after their heads exploded whilst reading the rag's coverage of the Olympics.
Mild confusion over the juxtaposition...
Surprise as West Ham Fan runs 50 yards on pitch without stopping for fag...
It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics.
There was shock and surprise as a West Ham...
Rose Gold for afternoon strolls
After a 112 year wait to prove how good we are at walking slowly around a park Britain's Justin Rose yesterday casually sealed gold...
International Olympics Comittee ‘really surprised’ by Russian doping
More than 1000 Russian athletes have been implicated as drug cheats by a report today. The Rochdale Herald asks "Only 1000. Really?"
At least 30...
Big penis denies any link to Romelu Lukaku
A big penis has spoken out today to deny any attachment to Manchester United striker Romelu Lukaku.
Speaking to reporters outside his home address, the...
Man who provided bags of piss for top cyclists nominated for sports personality of...
Top cycling teams have been paying tribute to the man who provides fresh urine to high profile Tour de France riders for drugs tests.
Chopper...
Horses! Football! And that’s all we have time for!
And they’re off
It’s Ascot in the lead, neck and neck with Sunny Weather, but coming up on the outside it’s Posh Girls Who Look...
A word in your ear Mr Lineker
I have a suggestion for Gary Lineker
Maybe you should stop selling Salt & Vinegar
If your boss still works with the devil
Then tell them to...
England team reveal plan to completely disappoint everyone is going smoothly
Gareth Southgate has revealed that his plan to completely disappoint loads of English people is going exactly according to plan.
At a press conference Southgate...
Konta tipped to be “a solid 6” when John Inverdale’s 2017 Sexist Gaffes are...
Finals Weekend at The Championships in Wimbledon is fast approaching and that can only mean one thing…the eagerly awaited 2017 Sexist Gaffes list from...
Facebook war between cyclists and motorists over as Froome takes one for the team
The cyclist/motorist war is over after Chris Froome stepped up and took the knock that all motorists claim cyclists have deserved for the last...
Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20
Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20.
Similar riots took place...



















































