It’s impossible to sandpaper a netball, concede Australians
Long standing dominance of sport by Australia and New Zealand ended by incredible English performance
Some say Australian carpentry skill brings them closer to Christ....
Team GB get the Trotts
Charlotte Dujardin became the second woman to win three Olympic gold medals today when she came first in the "Horse Dancing" contest this afternoon....
Poppies outraged at being hijacked by intolerable, out of touch band of Nationalists.
The prima-donna XI, also known as the England National football team, have confirmed that they will take to the pitch against Germany this Friday,...
Actual grown up man wins race around France on child’s toy
An actual grown up man has won a really long race around France on a children's toy.
The Team Sky rider from Cardiff, Geraint Thomas,...
International Olympics Comittee ‘really surprised’ by Russian doping
More than 1000 Russian athletes have been implicated as drug cheats by a report today. The Rochdale Herald asks "Only 1000. Really?"
At least 30...
Man with double-barrelled surname good at cricket.
MCC members expressed their delight yesterday that at long last someone with a proper surname was good at cricket.
"It's a shame young Toby Roland-Jones...
John Inverdale to host ‘Dog Toy or Sex Toy’ at Wimbledon this year
The BBC have announced that John Inverdale will present a dog toy or sextoy game during rain delays at this year's Wimbledon championships.
The move comes...
Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW
A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Rooney Returns to Everton because ‘I missed my Nan’
Overweight, red faced, former England captain Wayne Rooney is to leave Manchester United to return to his first club Everton as part of a...
Team GB to announce Stable Door Shutting as new olympic sport
Team GB are set to announce that "Stable Door Shutting" will become an Olympic sport, The Rochdale Herald has learned.
Following the UK government's announcement...
Ronaldo vows to work the full six weeks to pay £13 million tax bill
Many of us were shocked when top footballer, Cristiano Ronaldo was embroiled in tax evasion, especially to such a degree.
The highly-regarded player, often hailed...
Horses! Football! And that’s all we have time for!
And they’re off
It’s Ascot in the lead, neck and neck with Sunny Weather, but coming up on the outside it’s Posh Girls Who Look...
Rooney arrested crying into bottle of 20/20 wearing Man Utd pyjamas
My night of 20/20, Man Utd pyjamas and Steradent with mysterious brunette.
Everton striker Wayne Rooney has been charged with drink-driving offences in the...
Rochdale tipster to tax the Bookies
Horse racing journalists, tipsters, jockeys and even some dodgy-looking trainers are queuing up to apply for the Rochdale council's new Chief Executive of Betting...
Police called after black man beats the snot out of white guy live on...
Police were called to an address in Las Vegas earlier this morning after reports of a white man beaten senseless in an organised fight....
Russia announce plans for “performance enhanced” Olympics
Russia are set to announce plans to introduce the worlds first "performance enhanced" Olympics, we can reveal.
As many around the world will know, Russia...
