John Terry leaves Villa to spend more time with Wayne Bridge’s family

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John Terry has announced he's leaving Aston Villa today. Terry said he was leaving so that he could spend more time with Wayne Bridge's...

Balding just 2 Gold medals away from on air orgasm

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BBC sports anchor and part time Eddie Izzard lookalike Claire Balding is quite literally on the edge of making TV history by being the...

Euro 2020 tournament to be played on XBox, UEFA confirms

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The European Football Championship 2020 is to be played on XBox, UEFA has told The Rochdale Herald. In the wake of the Coronavirus pandemic, European...

Football players saving us all by not taking a pay cut

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The Professional Footballers Association have warned that a 30% cut in their members' wages would damage the NHS as it would reduce the amount...

Token female cycling club member thrilled to have been described as attractive

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A magazine feature by Cycling Weekly on the Hinckley Cycle Racing Club from Leicestershire was lambasted today after going to print with the caption...

Diver and Synchronised Partner win Olympic Gold

In a bizarre twist that no one seems to understand, two unknown divers who were neither Tom Daley nor his synchronised diving partner have...

Big penis denies any link to Romelu Lukaku

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A big penis has spoken out today to deny any attachment to Manchester United striker Romelu Lukaku. Speaking to reporters outside his home address, the...

Vatican declares official miracle after England win on penalties

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The Vatican has tonight declared an official miracle following England's penalty shootout victory over some goat farmers from Colombia. The victory is the first...
Putin 2

FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia

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FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in...

The Beckhams ditch L.A for glorious Rochdale

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Today the Herald can exclusively reveal the jaw dropping news that the world's biggest star, glamour model, fashion icon, tireless charity worker and one...

Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal

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Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer. Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...
Local Rochdale bowls club rocked by doping allegations

Local Rochdale bowls club rocked by doping allegations

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The Annual General Meeting of the Bamford Bowls Club was rocked by a scandal when multiple mens champion David Thrimbleton was accused of cheating by a...

Yoga All About Getting Your Head Up Your Own Fundament

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It’s always been said that there’s more to yoga than the lotus position, but it has been revealed recently that the true aim is...
Boxer hitting punchbag

Paul Nuttall – Why I Won’t Talk About Fight Club

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Paul Nuttall O.B.E is reluctant to talk about Fight Club, the global phenomenon he founded in 1996. “Chuck and me, we don't talk about it." He...

Rochdale AFC Announce Stadium Expansion

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Rochdale's Spotland stadium is set to unveil a new corporate section "with a difference" above the Willbutts Lane stand, in honour of world famous...

God shows that he hates Cristiano Ronaldo and Argentina

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God has revealed that he absolutely cannot stand Cristiano Ronaldo so he chose to favour Uruguay in yesterday's last 16 game. God or, The Word...

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