Dead whale found in Thames was Russian spy
The Government have announced that a whale that has been found dead beside the River Thames was a Russian spy.
The whale was found beside...
Martin Roberts Demands Recount.
Property botherer and dreadful chef Martin Roberts has demanded a recount following his failure to be elected President of the Jungle in this year's...
Corbyn ‘sells out’ in Stoke
Leader of the Labour Party, Jeremy Corbyn (27), has finally sold out in Stoke.
“Every single copy of my Big Issues has gone…”, said Corbyn....
Awkward Moment as Someone has to explain what a Joke is to Theresa May
There was an awkward meeting this morning when an assistant to the Prime Minister had to explain to her what a joke was.
This occurred...
Confused Alt-Right activists boycott PC World
Several branches of the computer retailer PC World have reported a spike in confused right-wing "activists" gathering outside their premises in protest.
The cause of...
Prince Philip to reprise role in new Star Wars film
His Royal Highness to play part of Grand Moff Tarkin again in latest outing of sci-fi saga.
Warning: contains spoilers
Shooting began today for the latest...
Some bloke in UKIP said something about the BBC
Bill Etheridge, a candidate for hard right conservative comedy troupe UKIP has said that the BBC should be privatised because it's "shoving left wing...
Gove cast as Tick-Tock in Rupert Murdoch’s adaption of ‘Peter Pan’
An all star cast is to appear in seasoned stage director Rupert Murdoch's new adaptation of the J. M. Barrie classic 'Peter Pan'.
Michael Gove...
Trump thwarts Milnrow knife attack.
Diners in a Milnrow curry house were astonished as the 45th (and probably last) President of the USA stopped an armed bandit carrying out...
Man thinks they’re getting dog instead of a baby
A poor deluded fool from Rochdale has convinced himself that he and his long term partner are getting a puppy instead of a baby.
Steve...
Piled rubbish masks smell of Birmingham city
Birmingham city council, has for the past few weeks been in the grips of a public sector strike. Birmingham’s ‘bin men’ are demanding fairer/higher...
Prince Harry to marry woman he is barely related to
Prince Harry is breaking with Royal protocol by marrying an American actress he is barely related to.
Kensington Palace are said to be disturbed saying...
New London Development Announced
With todays news that the Calais Jungle has been cleared of filthy asylum seekers, the ramshackle dwellings have immediately been occupied by an even...
Theresa May: Donald Trump told me to grab EU by the pussy
Donald Trump told Theresa May that she should "grab the EU by the pussy" rather than ask for its consent, according to an interview...
Nigel Farage reveals he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good
Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has revealed that he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good.
Mr Farage MP (just kidding) was...
Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month.
The Home Office has also announced that all...
