Turkey escapes Christmas by identifying as a golden eagle.
A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey.
"Once I found a tin...
?Britain First & UKIP oddly quiet about white family abusing student visa rules
Quite why the public aren't offended by the white, middle class family trying to buck the immigration system is baffling academics as anti-immigration campaigners...
Tory Party pledges to attack pot holes now it has defeated the disabled
The Tory Party has declared victory in its war against the disabled and announced it will re-deploy its resources in a war on pot...
Remote Scottish regions report shortages of wicker.
Reports are reaching us of shortages of some unexpected commodities in rural Scotland.
This follows human slug, Rod Liddle's advice in Der Spectator that people...
Rick Astley gives up turns around and deserts you
The 80's smash hit superstar and naughties annoying meme, Rick Astley, is hanging up his mic once and for all.
After the the shock death...
John Lewis advert “Darkly Sinister”
John Lewis, purveyors of things that ultimately no one needs or wants, has made everything better with a darkly sinister tale about a black...
Leave.EU tells orphaned bear to “piss off back to Peru”
Coming over here, shitting in our woods...
A small bear arrived in this country some years ago. The friendly bear, with his old hat, battered...
Couple looking forward to annual tedious night out, in dreadful nightclub with hideous people
A middle aged Rochdale couple are reportedly giddy with excitement about their annual tedious night out in a horrible club with hideous people tonight.
Barbara...
Tories secure parent vote after abolishing school holidays, weekends and Christmas
Parents up and down the country have thrown their support behind the Conservatives today after details emerged of a radical new plan to abolish school holidays and send children to school for 12 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days of the year.
Vote leave caught cheating at tombola
The vote leave campaign have today received a stern glare and a verbal ticking off for cheating at the village fete tombola.
It turns out...
Wetherspoons strike causes customer to drink 4 pack of lager for breakfast
A Wetherspoons customer has been forced to drink a 4 pack of lager for breakfast today due to staff at his local Wetherspoons being...
Rupert Murdoch’s face breaks ageing app
Media tycoon and ancient demonic scrotum, Rupert Murdoch has broken viral photo editor FaceApp, attempting to see what his face would look like in...
Electric shock therapy recharges your batteries, says sadistic boss
The boss of a Rochdale mobile phone tech support company, Globally Integrated Mobile Phone Solutions, has been telling the Herald how electric shock therapy...
14000 airbus job losses and 3.8 million settled migrants was on the other bus...
Brexiteers have been scrambling around attempting to tell everyone that 14,000 job losses at Airbus and 3.8 million settled migrants was on a completely...
Anger as Rochdale drops out of top 5 towns for childhood obesity
Rochdale residents have reacted with anger after it was revealed that Rochdale has dropped from 4th to 9th in the UK's childhood obesity ranking.
12...
Parent’s snow day ruined by children’s snow day
Not content with generally ruining your life, kids on snow days are one whinge away from being buried under that patio.
Parent and washed...
