Duke of Edinburgh embroiled in food poisoning compensation scam
The Duke of Edinburgh is reported to have become embroiled in a food poisoning compensation scam scandal today just hours after being discharged from...
Private rail company owner and Blairite totally unbiased about Traingate
Lord Sir Baron Richard Branson said today that claims that he has it in for rail nationalisation enthusiast Jeremy Corbyn are unfounded.
The gazillionaire, famous...
Paul Golding’s Prison-a-thon raises £5,000 for The Refugee Council
On an uncharacteristically serious note we'd like to thank each and every person who has donated or otherwise supported Paul's campaign for The Refugee Council.
Storm Eleanor wreaks havoc after gate left open on wind farm
Met Office issues "risk to life" warnings with wind speeds over 80mph expected overnight.
It has been revealed that Storm Eleanor, the latest storm to...
Daily Mail readers hospitalised after inhaling EU migrant gas at Birling Gap
Over one hundred patriotic Daily Mail readers were hospitalised yesterday after inhaling toxic EU migrant gas while innocently sea siding at Birling Gap.
The weather...
Scone versus scone pronunciation debate hits 14th consecutive hour
It's National Cream Tea Day, which means across the nation the fine china is taken off the Welsh dresser and selections of finger sandwiches...
Treasury announces British economy based on booze and barbeques
The Government has announced that the UK's economy is now based solely on beer and barbeques.
In a statement the Treasury said, "The sunny...
Concerns mount for Rochdale man not heard yelling at Six O’clock News
Concerns are mounting over the welfare of a Rochdale man who is apparently missing from his Lancashire home.
Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
Peter Andre to press Brexit Button
As part of her Key Note speech to the Conservative Party Conference today Theresa May is set to announce this explosive coup for the...
Right wing nutjob calls right wing nutjob a right wing nutjob
Leading members of the Right Wing Nutjobs Association have been flinging accusations around willy-nilly to the amusement of 'leftie libtards' everywhere.
Right wing nutjob...
Power vacuum at the top of British politics sponsored by Dyson
Into the breach steps the face that launched a thousand suckers, James Dyson. He wants the country to shake the dust off its feet...
Belfast Orange walk to become 24k Gold walk
The annual Orange walk of Belfast's protestant population is to take place this weekend and is expected to reveal itself now as a 24K...
Collins Dictionary compilers to take course in basic arithmetic after calling ‘fake news’ the...
Lexicographers who compile the Collins English Dictionary have been signed up en masse for a course in basic arithmetic, it has been revealed.
The move...
Russian government denies involvement in Aleksandr ‘the Meerkat’ Orlov poisoning
The Russian government has denied any involvement in the poisoning of Aleksandr 'The Meerkat' Orlov, after the TV star was found unconscious outside his...
Muppet fury over South West Trains slur
Muppets across Britain are furious today after learning that the name of their species was used as a slur to describe vandals by an...
“I didn’t want to go to your poxy wedding anyway” says Theresa May
Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Theresa May, has announced that she didn't want to go to the...
