Gove to juggle environment portfolio with rent boy role in Midnight Cowboy sequel

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Michael Gove will juggle his new appointment as environment minister with a starring role in the long awaited sequel to 60s cult classic movie,...
Toddler Prisoner

Government plans to lower age of criminal responsibility to 2 YEARS OLD

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To help with the deficit, the government will be lowering the age of criminal responsibility to 2. The age of criminal responsibility is currently...
Theresa May

May dissolves Parliament and calls snap General Election

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Theresa May has called a snap general election claiming that divisions at Westminster risked hampering the Brexit negotiations. The Prime Minister will require the support...
Jeremy Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn counterfeit poppy scandal

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There is outrage in many political and charitable quarters today after rumours emerged that senior members of the Labour Party have been selling Remembrance Day poppies and memorabilia to supplement their parliamentary incomes.

Symbolic figurehead has dinner with elected European leaders

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The symbolic figurehead of the United Kingdom, Theresa May, dined last night with the twenty seven elected heads of the European Union. Ms May was...

Sources say DFS might be having a sale IMMINENTLY

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If you want a new sofa, pay attention, because this could save you literally some pounds. In an exclusive scoop, The Rochdale Herald can reveal...
Big Ben EU UK

Theresa May says Britain and Europe should come together as if in some sort...

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Theresa May has been further outlining her vision for Brexit. The Prime Minister was speaking to journalists on her way home from Florence. She told...

Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED

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The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified. The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
Space Rocket

Israel launches airstrike on anti-semitic moon after spacecraft crash

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The first privately funded mission to the moon has had an apparent failure resulting in a crash. The Israeli spacecraft called Beresheet had been sent...
Champagne Socialist

“Are we middle class?” Ask champagne swilling corbynistas

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A group of friends from Rochdale have come to the horrible realisation that they maybe middle class. Julian "Trotsky" Bennett told us, "We're committed to...
Collection of London souvenirs

POTUS to “bring back some Brexit” as a souvenir from UK visit

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It has recently been announced that Donald Trump, the 45th President of the United States (POTUS) is to pay a state visit... Some chap who won...
Duke Brothers

Trump Presidency revealed as elaborate Duke Brothers $1 bet

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Reclusive Wall Street tycoons the Duke Brothers have been at it again, this time betting against US Democracy.
Cat licking

Cat that will only eat one type of food still happy to lick its...

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Your cat has confirmed that despite only being willing to eat one specific type of food, it is still more than happy to lick...

Stoke returning officer opened wrong envelope: Nuttall real winner!

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Stoke's election Returning Officer was forced to admit to an embarrassing mistake when he opened the wrong envelope and declared Labour had won. "I was...

Pothead Calls Kettle Black; Clinton Challenges Trump To TV Drug Blowout

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Trump Challenges Clinton To Drug Test Prior To Next Debate - Clinton Lashes Back With Drug Taking Contest Challenge US Election 2016; Following Donald Trump's...
man with money

Wonga provide financial aid package as Britain’s credit rating reduced

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Payday loan provider Wonga has announced today that it has offered to step in and help the government. The move follows a further reduction...

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