Theresa May Reacts Angrily To Snowden Sith Slur
Edward Snowden, the famous whistle-blower and internet freedom campaigner, has angered unelected PM Theresa May (or May not but she's not going to give...
Fat Fighters launches gold leaf ‘Sin Free’ range
Fat Fighters has introduced a new range gold leaf coated products to help gullible fatties spend more money and lose even more weight. The company...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
No Government is Better than a Bad Government, says May
Theresa May made the announcement after exit polls suggest that no single party will be able to form a government. "Let me be very...
Win Win Win with The Herald! We are giving away year’s free membership to...
That's right it's not a typo, we are feeling generous today at The Herald after an out of court settlement with them southern softies...
Man that failed GCSE Science now an expert in pediatrics
A Rochdale man who failed GCSE Science has revealed he's an expert on pediatrics and specializes in treatments for Pneumonia. Bill Board loudly announced...
David Blunkett confirms he’s still blind following driving test
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively confirm that David Blunkett is still blind. Mr Blunkett confirmed the findings of his most recent eye sight test...
Teenager on Love Island talks b******s for 60 minutes
Television viewers were left cringing tonight by one of the contestants on hit TV show Love Island.
Valerie Still said, "It was awful. They each...
What to do when your dog dies in your hot car
Summer is here and forecasters are predicting a heatwave in the coming weeks. With temperatures expected to hit 30oC the country will be awash...
Reverse-only cars to propel American manufacturing forward
It has been revealed that the Donald Trump administration plans to revitalise America’s former manufacturing heartland – the Rust Belt – with production of...
BBC to put Sir David Attenborough in a ‘stasis chamber’
The specialist chamber housing Sir David Attenborough was created by NASA for long haul space travel and would have allowed Astronauts to be put...
Boris Johnson books flight home from New York with Thomas Cook
Downing Street have issued a statement this morning explaining that Boris Johnson won't be able to attend Prime Minister's Questions today because he's stuck...
Monkey With Typewriter Writes ‘Donald Trump Is An Orangutan In A Suit’
There was great excitement at the Royal Institute For Statistical Improbability today.
Beppo, one of the infinite number of monkeys with typewriters trying to type...
Thomas the Tank Engine Outrage at Sodexit delay
The normally chipper blue tank engine Thomas has turned to social media to express his outrage at perceived delays in the Island of Sodor...
James Corden to star in Paul Nuttall biopic
International media sensation, corpulent bearded sex symbol and father of the year, James Corden is to take the starring role in a planned new...
20 a day smoker worried 5G mast will give him cancer
A Bolton man says he fears that 5 aside football pitch flood light is actually a secret 5G mast that will cause him to...
