Surprise as West Ham Fan runs 50 yards on pitch without stopping for fag...
It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics.
There was shock and surprise as a West Ham...
Boris Johnson books flight home from New York with Thomas Cook
Downing Street have issued a statement this morning explaining that Boris Johnson won't be able to attend Prime Minister's Questions today because he's stuck...
Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’
Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
Government announce plans to build new homes for immigrants on Rockall
Yesterday, far off of anyone's radar and while the teacup storm over Jeremy Corbyn's recent train journey reached stratospheric new heights, the UK government...
Stressed nurses sick of sick people
Shedloads of stressed-out British nurses are leaving the profession because they are fed up with their working conditions and marginally better than national average...
ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement
Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics.
In an interview he...
Theresa May Selective In Button Pressing
Prime Minister Theresa May briefly excited Brexiters yesterday when she announced she would definitely push the button.
As cheers rang out across the nation it...
Safest pub in all of Yorkshire has been named
A York pub has been named as the safest in the county. The White Hart, on Micklegate, has achieved the “zero bother” standard in the...
Nobody Offended By Twitter Joke
A joke posted on Twitter yesterday has met with a complete lack of offence for the first time in history.
The joke which reads "Most...
Couple spend entire evening on Netflix before deciding what film to watch at 1am
Johnny and Mary (not real names) are just your average suburban dwelling couple who work hard on the weekdays and like to relax in...
Whole UK Economy resting on single PPI claim
After the referendum on leaving the EU the treasury scrambled quickly to try and formulate a plan.
"No one actually thought the plebs would defy...
Yemenis Grateful That Britain Tidying Up Arms Deals
Ordinary Yemenis have taken a break from being killed by British and American bombs and weapons to thank the British Government for tightening up...
May To Wheel Out Trebuchet
Theresa May will relaunch her election campaign today with a classic bit of fighting kit. A trebuchet nicknamed 'Warwolf".
The trebuchet, effectively a giant catapult,...
Dropping out of University should be affordable for everyone says University dropout
Jeremy Corbyn will today lay out his manifesto pledge to make dropping out of university courses affordable for everyone.
He will tell supporters that, under...
New VW Eco-Diesel Car Scraps Itself In Event Of Ecological Disaster
Volkswagen announced the launch date for the VW Plannett Fuckerr, their new eco-friendly diesel family saloon today, assuring customers that this is 'the most...
Theresa May wins ‘Person Most Surprised Theresa May is Prime Minister’ Award seventh week...
Theresa May is said to be thrilled this morning to have won the all party "Person Most Surprised Theresa May is still Prime Minister...
