Allegations 15,000 dick pics discovered on Boris Johnson’s Foreign Office issued mobile phone
The Foreign Office has denied allegations that a mobile phone issued to Boris Johnson when he was Foreign Secretary was found to contain 15,000...
Southern Rail Timetable wins Man Booker Prize for fiction
The visionary author of Southern Rail's timetable, Bernard Jones, has been announced as the seventh winner of the Man Booker International Prize for fiction.
The...
Piers Morgan to be face of ‘Free The Ballbag’ campaign
Piers Morgan has been revealed as the new face of men's rights campaign 'Free the Ballbag'.
Inspired by the feminist 'Free The Nipple' movement, the...
Britons to get easy sex after Brexit as the whole world lines up to...
Good news on the prospects with Brexit this afternoon as news broke that the entire world is lining up to provide easy sex for...
Everyone to star in latest series of Big Brother
In a massive change of direction, our government known for privatising everything for short term gain and long term loss has bought out Dutch based media...
Theresa May’s Rituals
"Theresa May is signalling distress." Dr. Maca Damia comments, viewing photos of the Prime Minister kneeling by the road just inside Wales.
"Do you see...
Huddersfield Town veterans prepared for step up in pace
Senior members of the Huddersfield Town squad today confirmed that they have no concerns about promotion.
“I took some advice about staying fit for...
Trump state visit downgraded amid protest fears
It has been announced that President Trump’s forthcoming visit to the UK has been downgraded from a full state visit.
POTUS was invited to meet...
David Cameron to star in remake of Max Headroom
David Cameron is to take the lead role in a remake of cult 80's sci-fi film and TV show, Max Headroom sources close to...
George Michael declined 33rd heart transplant after ‘giving them away’
The 80's pop sensation 90's cop bothering loiterer and naughties stoner George Michael has been refused the vital surgery by the NHS.
Chief Cardiovascular Surgeon...
Three dead on final day of Poundworld closing down sale
Questions are being raised following the trampling of three shoppers in riots on the final day of opening of Poundworld at Sheffield Heeley Retail...
Conservative Party logo to be replaced with picture of Priti Patel’s smirk
The Conservative Party are to replace their established 'oak tree' logo with a graphic representation of Priti Patel's smirking face, the Herald can reveal.
The...
Brexit Cancelled as Civil Servants Finally Read “Article 50”
All nations attending Treaty discussions are only allocated one car parking space.
UK plans for "Brexit" have hit the buffers after Westminster Civil Servants finally...
We’re nothing like Michael Gove, insist Weasels
Weasels are up in arms at being compared to Michael Gove after reading an article in The Telegraph today that speculated that he may have "weaselled" his way into Theresa May's cabinet.
Michael Gove “more slippery than Teflon”
Independent research at the Technical University of Rochdale has found that Michael Gove is more slippery than Teflon - and that a patent has...
Outcry as Moon to get 4G before Burnley
There was protest in East Lancashire today, as plans by Vodafone & Nokia to launch a 4G mobile network on the lunar surface from...
