Yorkshire driving ban on women to be lifted
The King of Yorkshire, His Majesty Geoffrey Boycott the first, has issued a decree allowing women to drive within the Sovereign state for the...
Catholic Church installs automated ‘Buggery Forgiveness Hotline’ to ease waiting times
The hard-pushed Catholic Church has created call-centre style automated phone lines to reduce congestion caused by confessing their most popular sin.
"Local priests across the...
Asian family enjoying post night out curry accused of ‘Cultural Appropriation’
A British-Asian family came under intense fire today, after being accused of extreme 'cultural appropriation' from White groups, for enjoying a post pub curry...
Alien Overlords to Admit Existence is a computer simulation.
It is to be announced that reality as we understand it is nothing more than a computer simulation.
The shock admission was beamed into the...
Government that can’t afford to electrify TransPennine Express announces plans for a space program
The Government has announced a vague and ill thought out plan to start a space program instead of electrifying the TransPennine Express railway line.
A...
Lovely Grandma catches racism after wiping bottom on Daily Mail
A lovely old grandma who contracted racism during a trip to Burnley last week is in a "serious condition" after being admitted to an...
Baby seals used in making of new £1 coin.
The bank of England and Royal Mint announced today that the new pound coin that entered into circulation this week is made using the...
If you’ve got something to say to me say it to my face, says...
Rochdale resident Rhona Rumbelow, 32, reacted angrily to something someone may or may not have said to someone else on Saturday at Swingers' nightclub...
The Smiths to reform for Cameron benefit concert
Legendary 80s Manchester miserablists The Smiths are to reform for a one-off benefit concert for former UK prime minister David Cameron, a spokesperson for...
Corbyn defection massive blow to crybaby lefties
Shock news reaching us today of defection of the Labour leader and terrorist sympathiser Jeremy Corbyn has left the party in favour of Britain First.
The shock...
Corbyn Calls for Alton Towers to be Nationalised as Queues for Rollercoaster hits 2...
Waiting for hours for the hope of a seat, crushed up against other in the park, or crouched uncomfortably in the queues is an...
Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit
Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...
BBC at a loss to explain low ratings for “Bantmeister” Grimshaw
BBC bosses are completely at a loss to explain why Nick Grimshaw's BBC Radio 1 breakfast show has suffered its biggest drop in ratings...
London prime ministerial fatberg is too strong and stable to shift
Following the news that a massive lump of fat, plastic and waste material is blocking London's sewer works, the Rochdale Herald spoke to an...
Labour confirms 2018 party conference will be held in Mecca
The Labour Party has denied accusations of ‘Muslim appeasement’ at its annual conference in Brighton, after several eagle-eyed observers noticed that its conference banner...
Brexit means boo-boo for May’s haute couture
Prime Minister Theresa May has been pictured wearing some of the very best in British haute couture recently.
Her bold departure from her usual...
