Fuck it what’s the worst that can happen Theresa May tells journalists
Theresa May has dramatically announced the date for triggering Article 50 with a press conference today.
Before pressing the big red button that triggers...
Young people cause cancer Daily Mail warns
The Daily Mail has exclusively revealed that British youth is causing cancer.
In its article on the subject the Mail pointed out that British youths...
Mecca Bingo rebrands as Bethlehem Number Snap
Britain's biggest bingo operator Mecca Bingo is to be rebranded "Bethlehem Number Snap" following pressure from right wing political groups a spokesman for Mecca's...
Homeopaths to protest NHS cut with one person million man march
Homeopaths are to warn Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt that he faces severe blowback from them if he does not reverse the cut to homeopathic...
Daily Mail wins award for inciteful journalism
The Daily Mail Editor has collected another prestigious award, in a glittering events ceremony in the Dubai International Finance Centre (“DIFC”).
Editor Paul Dacre...
Piers Morgan caught rummaging through bins looking for the smirk that’s been wiped off...
Voice mail enthusiast and professional shit stirrer, Piers Morgan, has been spotted scouring the bins behind a Lidl in Hammersmith.
The toe faced smarm slinger...
Donald Trump to appoint Mr Muscle™ as his new Coronavirus advisor
In a move that has been described as both "batshit crazy" and "utterly, utterly mental", US President Donald Trump has revealed plans to appoint...
There’s nothing funny about the Tories moan satirists
Satirists up and down the country are throwing their pens and finger bashing the backspace key in frustration.
"It's the bloody Tories" said one writer...
Bruce Forsyth ‘can’t wait’ to draw his pension
Following the news today that the government of the United Kingdom will shortly be raising the retirement age to 168 years old Bruce Forsyth...
Government announces new mascot for Brexit Will of the People
Brexit Minister, David Davis, today announced the launch of a new campaign which aims to give Britain's exit from the European Union a more...
Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...
Remain Voter Desperately Waiting for Pound to Die
Due to an almost pathological desire to be proven correct, a Remain voter is obsessively checking the sterling exchange rate for signs of terminal illness.
"A bad...
G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.
President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...
Heinz announces new alphabetti spaghetti for the blind
Purveyors of fine bean and pasta based tinned goods, Heinz, announced a new product this morning.
A spokesman told The Rochdale Herald:
"It's all about equal...
Man on cocaine has best idea ever
Barry Inferness, a 34 year old brick layer from Scotland made the discovery at a house party in Smallbridge last week;
"A just thought, yer...
Zuckerberg assures Facebook have absolutely no information about your STD
It's a sore subject that can become inflamed easily but there's an itch that needs to be scratched.
In the wake of the fall out...
