We're all going to die

We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond

0
Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...

Donald Trump signs Executive Order Banning Entry of Toddlers into USA

0
After being alerted to the shockingly high number of deaths caused by toddlers shooting their parents, President Trump signed the legally binding order yesterday that prevents...

Global economy near collapse after George Osborne pulls sickie

0
It has been revealed that once George Osborne takes up his post as Editor of the London Evening Standard, his importance to the global...
Teenager

Teenager born in 2000 looks forward to enjoying retiring in 2120

0
Today the government announced that plans to change to the state pension retirement age to 68 will take effect in 2037, 7 years earlier...
Connor McGregor

Conor McGregor refuses to quit, offers Stephen Hawking a game of ‘da physics’

0
In a ground-breaking move, career punchist and all round feckin' lad Conor McGregor has revealed his plans to offer professor Stephen Hawking a game...
Theresa May

Prime Minister Hospitalised After Strong and Stable Seizure

0
Prime Minister Theresa May was rushed to hospital this evening after suffering what is described as a "strong and stable" seizure. The incident occurred while...
Downing Street

Stubborn turd refuses to flush

6
A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...

Brexit a Fucking Shambles, Says John Major

0
Former Prime Minister and voice of reason John Major has confirmed in a speech that the ongoing government brexit negotiations are a fucking shambles. Major,...
Terminator

Kids told not to worry about GCSE results as they will be ‘no use’...

0
Children have been told that GCSE's will be of no use in the coming land war with the robots. The education Secretary Justine Greening has...
Homeless

Survey reveals homeless choose to live on streets so they cannot appear on Come...

0
To many, the issue of homelessness invokes thoughts of a person falling on hard times, perhaps even drink, drugs, or criminality. Now, the latest...

Britain to stop messing about and put the clocks back twenty years this October

Tony Blair woke this morning to find himself in the enviable position of a second chance at his legacy with the announcement the clocks...
May and Cameron

Theresa May Attempting To Make David Cameron Look Better In Retrospect

0
Theresa May’s goal as Prime Minister is to ensure that people don’t remember David Cameron’s premiership as the worst in history, it has emerged. Speaking...

Herald wins “Satirical Web Page of the Year”

2
It's a day of celebration at the Rochdale Herald as we are delighted to announce we have won Satirical Web Page of the Year...

Amber Rudd announces plan to ban envelopes

0
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has announced that envelopes will be banned from the end of the month. The Home Office has also announced that all...

Interflora agent admits to killing Lady Di in deathbed confession shock

16
Alleged deathbed confession implicates both floral delivery service and royal family in assassination plot In a shock announcement that has been doing the rounds on...

All your medals belong to us – Says China

0
As the country basks in the glory of Team GB's second place in the Olympic medal table, China released a press statement saying, "The People's...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts