Vegan runs Great South Run without telling anybody he’s a vegan
A vegan has reportedly completed the Great South Run today without feeling the need to tell everyone.
Spain v Russia VAR officials wives and children released from captivity
Members of the VAR officials team for the Russia V Spain game have been speaking of their joy at being reunited with their families again.
The...
Labour leader confirms that he has a plan to break the country as well...
Jeremy Corbyn has closed this year’s Labour conference with a rousing speech to his Corbynista fans explaining his plans for an entirely fictitious and...
Last man smart enough to figure out how to set clock on Microwave dies...
The last man intelligent enough to set the clock on the microwave to the correct time has reportedly died aged 74.
The man, an astrophysicist...
Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas.
One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...
ISIS Propose Christmas Cease-Fire Kickabout
ISIS troops fighting around the city of Palmyra have suggested that hostilities be put aside for a few hours at Christmas for an informal game of football with opposing ground forces.
Austerity horror as Samantha Cameron admits to sending her cook to Aldi
Samantha Cameron has triggered an outpouring of concern this morning with the revelation that she has had to send cook to Aldi.
And it gets...
Tsunami threat issued for East coast of England after Yorkshireman does massive poo
A Tsunami threat has been issued for the East coast of England after a man who hasn't had a shit for a week...
Celebrity chefs ranked most important profession in the world
In an online survey comprising over 10,000 people, Celebrity Chefs ranked number 1 in a choice of 100 of the most important and influential...
Bullshit to power Westminster by 2025 say Greens
Pure bullshit from the House of Commons is to be converted into useful energy to power the City of Westminster, the Green Party has...
Trump Election Due To Cosmic Emissions Says Brian Cox
Professor Brian Cox has explained the recent election of Donald Trump by pointing to a rare stellar phenomenon. The Oldham-but-not-Rochdale born scientist explained:-
"On the 9th...
Stevie Wonder just chooses to be blind, says Kanye West
Batshit crazy US rapper Kanye West has said that the Stevie Wonder’s blindness may be a “choice.”
Thickos more likely to believe any old bollocks scientists reveal
Scientists at Rochdale Community university have discovered that thickos will believe pretty much anything they see on Facebook
Pro Brexit MP’s walk out of Brexit meeting rather than face reality
Several Brexit-supporting MPs walked out of a meeting on Brexit today when a report proved to be too gloomy.
“I was expecting the report to...
Daily Mail website wins ISIS award for services to Jihad
ISIS have awarded the Daily Mail website, MailOnline.com, its prestigious Jihadi Of The Year Award.
This is the first time the sought after prize, known...
MPs FORCED to play football in PARLIAMENT after ARROGANT ASTROTURF OPERATOR respects existing bookings
A talented group of female footballing MPs have no choice except to train for football games in the House of Commons
Starting a new football...
