Whatever gave you the impression I will deal with student debt asks man who...
A man who distinctly said that he’d “deal with” student debt during an interview with the NME is curious to know why everybody was...
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the...
Fifty Shades Of Grey to become the government’s new race relations manual
We’ve all heard the expression about not judging a book by its cover, but one of the most notorious books of the current decade...
UKIP Conspiracy theorists claim Paul Nuttall is being erased from history
UKIP leader, Paul Nuttall PhD, is concerned that he is being erased from history by a shadowy group of leftist and liberal media conspirators.
He recently had to...
Burnley opens new “All you won’t eat” vegetarian restaurant
Burnley's first "All you won't eat" buffet style restaurant opened it's doors today.
The lavish 10 seater eaterie offers food that most locals would...
NHS to be shut down so sick people can get used to feeling poorly
In a shock move Sunday UK chancellor Philip Hammond, announced that his first budget on Wednesday will outline plans for a complete end to...
‘On The Buses’ Star In 70’s Sex Shocker
In light of the recent revelations surrounding the scandalous sexual exploits of certain Hollywood actors and some of our own MP’s, one of Britain’s...
Stephen Fry forced to deny writing tomorrow’s Queen Speech
Rumours are circulating within Westminster village regarding tomorrow's Queen's Speech. In order for it to be the unmistakable work of comedy everyone expects, Downing Street...
Patriots actually just thick twats scientists prove
Scientists at Rochdale's Community University have proven conclusively that people identifying themselves on social media as "Patriots" are actually just thick twats.
The Sun to relaunch as Colouring Book
The UK’s second best-selling hate rag, The Sun, is to be relaunched as a colouring book.
As of next week, the Murdoch-owned ‘newspaper’ will cease...
Hipster MP demanding new laws be written on slate
We just tell all the farmers growing baby cows to leave them alone to live as they did in the wild. They can all start mining slate. Any excess they have they can sell to the restaurants in their area for use as napkins and plates.
Belinda Carlisle vindicated as Heaven proved to be a place on Earth.
The scientific and religious worlds were in shock yesterday after a newly discovered island in a remote part of the Indian Ocean was found...
Rochdale man jailed for putting milk in tea before taking out teabag
A Rochdale man has been jailed for seven years for crimes against tea, it has been reported today.
Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
World leaders tackle climate change with massive party and flights home on private jets
The world's elite gave their 100% commitment to climate change this Monday by having a colossal piss up then returning to all corners of...
Dad boils right amount of pasta for family of 4
Buddhists talk in hushed tones of Nirvana, the ultimate; where there is perfection and no sense of self.
Many strive to reach this end...
South African Scientist Discovers Free Non-Polluting Energy Source
Imagine the scenario: you are in a pub, when a local starts spouting racist nonsense. You have an overwhelming desire to stand up and...
