Rochdale – Labour NEC “Can’t find its arse with both hands”
In the face of the least popular Tory Government since the Peterloo Massacre, Labour has decided not to bother being an opposition of any...
Annual day of disappointment for fathers receiving crap presents
It's Father's Day and an annual day of depression for men across the nation as fathers are expected to sit, smile and feign appreciation...
Muslims damage white man’s van outside mosque, screams Daily Mail
Allegedly Paul Dacre rang round every Daily Mail journalist to ensure The Daily Mail created the appropriate coverage of the terrorist incident in Finsbury.
Simply...
Mark Francois – Gammon Messiah: A Parliamentary Sketch
An hour of hilarity last night made the last three years of purgatory almost worth it.
The efforts by the hardest, crustiest elements of the...
Institute for Fiscal Studies claims girls don’t like boys, girls like cars and money
Economists at The Institute for Fiscal Studies sensationally claimed yesterday that girls don't like boys but they do like cars and money.
The report said...
Grant Shapps hires ferry fleet to transport people back to offices
Transport secretary Grant Shapps is so convinced that going back to work in offices is safe, that he has hired a fleet of ferries...
Theresa May to raise voting age to 35
Senior Tory advisors, still reeling from Thursday's disastrous election result which provided a hung parliament, are said today to be telling the prime minister Theresa May that something serious has to be done about Britain's broken electoral system.
Daily Mail editor defends decision to exclude Gold medallist with alopecia from cover
The editor at the Daily Mail has allegedly defended his decision to only put two of the gold medalists from the four woman, world...
Breaking News: Hundreds of MP’s feared dead in Catastrophic Westminster fire
This could be the headline if the Houses of Parliament aren't upgraded.
A one off special of the show 'Homes Under The Hammer' will be...
Department Responsible For Brexit Does A Flit
Following heavy criticism for having achieved sweet Fanny Adams in the numerous months since its creation, workers at the Department for Exiting the European...
I’m definitely not addicted to my smartphone, says person reading this on her smartphone
A Rochdale woman has told her friends that she's definitely not addicted to her smartphone, whilst reading a news story about people being addicted...
World Health Organisation upgrades five-second rule to three seconds rule
The World Health Organisation has taken the unprecedented step of upgrading the five-second rule to just three seconds.
As the deadly Coronavirus pandemic sweeps the...
Mecca Bingo rebrands as Bethlehem Number Snap
Britain's biggest bingo operator Mecca Bingo is to be rebranded "Bethlehem Number Snap" following pressure from right wing political groups a spokesman for Mecca's...
Daily Mail readers cancel WWF donations after discovering pandas aren’t native to Britain
Daily Mail 'readers' have been cancelling donations to the World Wildlife Fund today after the newspaper revealed that it helps wildlife not native to...
Piers Morgan behaves like a d**k on Twitter, again
Piers Morgan has taken to Twitter to characteristically behave like an utter tit today.
Morgan, whose only physical accomplishment of note was to fall off...
Idris Elba to play Duke of Wellington
In what has been seen as an homage to Brexit, Idris Elba is to take on the role of The Duke of Wellington in...
