Flag Furore as Fans Face Fines
An entire street on Rochdale's Newbold estate was threatened with fines on Monday - if they refuse to remove a multitude of flags from...
Jeremy Corbyn demands General Election so voters can choose between Brexit or Brexit
Jeremy Corbyn has demanded that the Government call a General Election in order that the public can choose between his insane version of Brexit...
Gritty realism of Doctor Who ‘stretched beyond credulity’ by absence of penis
Hard-hitting documentary Doctor Who, dedicated to exposing the harsh reality of spontaneously-regenerating Time Lords, has become 'a laughing stock ruined by periods', agree internet...
Rochdale Herald editor drowns in tragic Daily Mail tractor accident
In an incident uncannily similar to the fate of controversial media proprietor, Robert Maxwell, who apparently drowned after falling from his private yacht, an...
Miley Cyrus to sue Boris Johnson for £350M over unauthorised cover of “Wrecking Ball”
The worlds of entertainment and politics appear to have combined this morning with the speculation that pop superstar Miley Cyrus is expected to sue...
Monster Raving Looney Party rejects Douglas Carswell for being TOO weird
Having survived a terror attack last Thursday the British parliament has been delivered another shock with the news that the Official Monster Raving Loony...
Hipster twats demand clean shaven white twats condemn terror twats
Nathan Barley led calls today for clean shaven white twats to “take responsibility for their community.”
“It is imperative, at this time of national crisis,...
Diver and Synchronised Partner win Olympic Gold
In a bizarre twist that no one seems to understand, two unknown divers who were neither Tom Daley nor his synchronised diving partner have...
Rothschilds ‘surprised’ at Trump victory but pleased in investment in US wall building company
The Rothschild family are set for a huge windfall following Donald Trump's 'surprise' success in the US election.
Labour MP Needs To Bathe In Ocean
Wanky-named cod impersonator and Labour MP Thangar Debonairre (ironically in charge of modern culture!) was recently told to "Get in the sea," by a...
Jacob Rees-Mogg announces plan for every UK baby to have his DNA by 2040
This is a key policy behind Rees-Mogg's bid for the Conservative party leadership.
According to leaked documents, he is going to take his cue from...
Veganism can be cured claim scientists
Scientists at Bideford University have claimed that the recent epidemic of Veganism can be stopped if victims receive treatment in the early stages of...
STD’s seek Brexit freedom of movement assurances
Several prominent sexually-transmitted infections have today sought assurances from the Government that Brexit will not have a negative impact on their European transmission rates.
In an...
Prime Minister Theresa May autobiography to be made into a feature film
Footloose 2 will follow the adventures of a band of feisty teens who live in a town where dancing on Sundays is against...
Women Still Not Going Down Regularly Enough Say Men
The most recent figures for the UK Prison Population gender gap show men getting sent down at record levels with women going down barely...
Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services.
In the statement, Chancellor of...




















































