Men in Rural England “Shitting Themselves” as Helen Titchener Walks Free
Men up and down the UK will now be sleeping with one eye open and replacing all the knives in the house with plastic...
Corbyn Publicly Apologies For Labour Lords
It's been widely reported that the House of Lords struck a severe blow to British democracy last night.
The blow, sponsored by a rogue...
Banks Punish Entrepreneurs For Brexit
Our Finance and Business correspondent, Scott Zsalt, was livid today after failing to get support from a major bank due to the fallout from...
Poppy Squad to begin patrolling UK streets from next week
Poppy Enforcement Directive Officers (PEDO's) are to begin patrolling the UK's streets from next week, the Government has announced.
The officers, obese men dressed in...
Tony Blair ego in critical condition after found clinging to Brexit controversy in Atlantic
After being lost for several months following his exile from the UK, Tony Blair's ego has been found clinging desperately to a Brexit controversy...
Trump administration to ban 1984 and burn Fahrenheit 451
The United States Federal Communications Commission (FCC) will be confiscating all copies of George Orwell’s novel 1984 and burning all copies of Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451,...
Fake news reporting undermining professionals
Following the news that the owner of everyone's favourite dog and Facebook creator, Mark Zuckerberg has called to investigate fake news sites and exercise...
Daily Mail readers cancel WWF donations after discovering pandas aren’t native to Britain
Daily Mail 'readers' have been cancelling donations to the World Wildlife Fund today after the newspaper revealed that it helps wildlife not native to...
Nigel Farage announces he’s to quit politics to become UKIP leader
Nigel Farage has announced today he is planning to quit politics to become leader of UKIP, again.
Editor of satirical Newspaper “not convinced” readers know what satire means
The editor of a satirical newspaper was reported to have his head in his hands after 60,000 people read an article he'd written about...
Rochdale Herald distances itself from Rochdale Herald Online question whether Daily Mail Editor Paul...
We are aware this may make us appear terribly foolish. The Rochdale Herald Editor, the late Quentin D Fortesqueue, is seething about the lack of...
Sir Philip Green in Robin Hood Shocker
Serial cash withdrawer Sir Philip Green has caused fresh controversy today with claims that revered British folk hero Robin Hood was the' worst sort...
Media blackout of J***** C***** continues
All national media outlets are continuing with their agreement to stop any reporting of a certain well known political leader this week, who we...
Team GB to announce Stable Door Shutting as new olympic sport
Team GB are set to announce that "Stable Door Shutting" will become an Olympic sport, The Rochdale Herald has learned.
Following the UK government's announcement...
Robots refusing cyber attack vaccine due to autism fears
The UK's robots have told the Government that they will refuse a vaccine that provides protection from computer viruses, over fears it could cause...
Pretentious Burnley couple having a thanksgiving dinner can’t understand why nobody’s coming
A Rochdale family have been telling The Rochdale Herald how a Burnley couple have invited them to Thanksgiving dinner tonight.
Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale...
