Argentina demand the return of Love Island
Britain has become embroiled in an unexpected diplomatic farrago as ITV2’s ‘Love Island’ draws to a dramatic close with Argentina demanding the return of...
Power Hungry Admins Have New Axe To Wield
With the advent of the all new ‘mute button’, passive, aggressive bitches everywhere are in their element.
We spoke to one such angry woman,...
The only chemicals you can kills kids with are high explosives and white phosphorus,...
Following the outcry over the alleged chemical weapons attacks in Syria, the Pentagon have confirmed that the only legal chemicals you can use to...
Sir Philip Green in Robin Hood Shocker
Serial cash withdrawer Sir Philip Green has caused fresh controversy today with claims that revered British folk hero Robin Hood was the' worst sort...
Boris Johnson confirmed to star in remake of Bill and Ben
Odd hairstyle, dependent upon Weed, strange manner of attire, frankly incomprehensible language - and you can see who's pulling the strings.
Boris Johnson was born to...
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Liberal Metropolitan Elite plan to rig election goes awry when Hermes deliver rubbers to...
The Liberal Metropolitan Elite was reeling last night when a delivery of 2 million rubbers was delivered to the wrong address.
The Elite were allegedly planning...
Prize boffin apparently unaware of weather
The winner of this year's Dyson James Dyson Boffin Admired By Dyson's James Dyson Award, is Isis.
No, not the naughty middle eastern twerps, a...
Outcry as Moon to get 4G before Burnley
There was protest in East Lancashire today, as plans by Vodafone & Nokia to launch a 4G mobile network on the lunar surface from...
Woman chains herself up in bid to stop voting for the Conservatives
A mother is so desperate to stop voting for the Conservatives she has chained herself up in her room to prevent access to a...
The Herald Headline Review: Today’s Sunday paper headlines in one easy read
The Sun on Sunday leads with a report that Jeremy Corbyn was seen at the same hotel as someone vaguely related to someone who...
Shit closer to hitting fan than yesterday
Analysts and experts of faecal matters are saying that the shit, that was yesterday quite close to the fan, is now a bit closer...
Moaning Mourinho In Lip Wobble Outburst
The future of games at Old Trafford are in doubt after Manchester United Manager Jose Mourinho demanded the removal of peas from referee's whistles...
Corbyn’s reelection met with scenes of ecstatic jubilation
There were scenes of unprecedented jubilation at the news of the corduroy communist Corbyn's reelection at Downing Street today.
A spokes-Sloan for the Tory Party...
Nobody arsed about Green Party Manifesto leak
Last night a draft of Labour's election manifesto was leaked leading to pro Brexit outrage paper, The Daily Mail, drawing comparisons between Labour's proposed policies and...
Amnesty International petition UN to halt Southern Rail human rights abuses
Southern announced today that the endless years of appalling service were over.
"We've been building to this moment." Someguywhohatespeoplesaid. "And today
I can announce that we're replacing...



















































