New £50 note to be made of foie gras
In a surprise move, it was revealed today that the new £50 note is to be made of foie gras. The announcement comes as...
Nuttall pulls out of Stoke by-election
NHS hating, pathological liar and leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall, has today pulled out of the Stoke by-election after it was revealed that his remaining...
Team GB to announce Stable Door Shutting as new olympic sport
Team GB are set to announce that "Stable Door Shutting" will become an Olympic sport, The Rochdale Herald has learned.
Following the UK government's announcement...
Six year old girl fears poisoning after finding new food mixed into her food
Six year old Sally Parker, domestic overseer and student, has recoiled in horror fearing poisoning after the discovery of new food mixed into food...
Panic grips nation as Britain realises Boris is in charge
Supermarkets across the land are fast running out of canned goods and bottled water and survivalist websites across the world are crashing as thousands...
Daily Mail Editor defends decision to describe a psychopath as an alopecia suffer, not...
Less than a week has gone by since a Daily Mail editor allegedly tried to defend his decision to relegate the Olympic Gold Medallist,...
Skeletor still ‘pretty buff’ for a skeleton
Men's Health Magazine today announced its annual Top Ten Fittest Male Celebs list with actor, recently elected DUP MP and self proclaimed evil overlord Skeletor...
Being interviewed about your job is a bit like being raped, says chinless toad
The United Kingdom has apologised "unreservedly" for making Michael Gove a Cabinet Minister after he compared being raped to being a bit like being...
Labour MPs win right for toilet break during final vote on Brexit deal
After a tense round of debating in the house of commons Labour MPs succeeded in forcing through an amendment to the Brexit bill which...
Teenager with first name ‘Giggs’ finally, inevitably, murders his father.
Giggs Johnson (17) was found guilty of murdering his father at Rochdale Court yesterday. In an unusual move the foreman of the jury addressed...
GBBO causes football fracas
It has been revealed that last night's violence at the London stadium was caused when West Ham fans chanted the name of the Bake...
The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics
The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...
May to ‘Rasta’ it up
In a leaked Downing Street memo, it is believed that Prime Minister Theresa May is to reach out to sections of society who feel...
Herald Guide to Parties Brexit Position
As the General Distraction looms ever closer, more and more people are wondering where the various parties stand on the issue of Brexit.
So we...
‘Child on hospital floor’ journalist joins the Rochdale Herald’s staff
The Rochdale Herald is proud to announce the appointment of surely-ex-by-now Telegraph columnist Allison Pearson to our staff.
"Our quest for people who can spout...
Middle East Side Story
A controversial piece of performance theatre is set to premiere at Rochdale's Gracie Fields Theatre shortly before Christmas this year:
Director Sheldon Jervis announced plans...
