Rochdale Beautician cautioned in blacking up row
There were furious scenes in Rochdale as a local beautician was arrested on suspicion of racism after "blacking up" unsuspecting customers.
Visitors to the day...
We either hunt foxes or your children says Theresa May
With the Conservatives promising a return of hunting foxes all over the nation face having to run from a vicious pack of slobbering, howling posh twats...
Tony Blair reveals ‘only God can judge me’ tattoo
Tony Blair has revealed his new tattoo. Mr Blair got the tattoo during a drunken night at Silvio Berlusconi's villa. The tattoo says, "Only...
Labour manifesto to revolutionise politics by getting rid of the Labour party
The Labour Party has revealed a manifesto that will revolutionise British politics by getting rid of the Labour Party.
Speaking to the Herald a spokesman...
SHOCK as imaginary money not worth the paper it isn’t written on
Completely imaginary money continues to give investors an interesting ride after its value of approximately whatever we pretend it is fell by a third.
Nigel Farage launches leadership challenge
Less then 24 hours after fewer than half of UKIP members voted for part time Ronnie Wood lookalike Diane James to be their new...
Foreign words banned from entering English language March 2019
Foreign words already resident in the native tongue, like Welsh ones, will be allowed to remain after England (and the others) exit the EU.
Having cake and eating it disappointment intensifies
A group of Rochdale toddlers are stamping their feet and crying after they were told that they cannot have their cake and eat it.
The...
Surprise! I was born in Kenya says Barack Obama
Barack Obama surprised the world today after announcing that he wasn't actually born in America after all but was actually born in Kenya, and to top it off is a Muslim.
Le Pen assures voters that despite National Front name change they are still massive...
In a bid to allay concerns that the name change from National Front to National Rally will dilute the purity of the party, Marine...
McVitie’s and Walkers crisps back plans to decriminalise cannabis
Mcvities and Walkers crisps have allegedly got behind a backbench revolt to decriminalise cannabis.
Plans are already being made to reclassify cannabis from a class...
Leave voters incensed as EU threatens to take away Continental summer weather
Leave voters voiced their anger today as the EU threatened to take away the Continental weather that sees England baking in sunshine and heat...
Ian Duncan Smith calls on snowflakes, losers and traitors to resolve virus problems
Ian Duncan-Smith, MP for Chingford and Minister of Nothing-in-Particular, was speaking on Radio 5 when he admitted there were problems involved with the government's...
Tributes flood in for trailblazing feminist who has died aged 91
The world is today in mourning for pioneering feminist and humanitarian Hugh Hefner, who has died at his home in California just hours after...
Scientists confirm this is the weird parallel universe
After 2 years of unprecedented levels of worldwide idiocy, scientists have discovered that the parallel universe where weird shit happens is this one.
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Theresa May admits “Brexit Bill” scrawled on back of napkin
Prime Minister Theresa May today admitted that the 'Brexit Bill', allowing her to trigger the Article 50 exit clause from the European Union had been drafted,...




















































