Wolverhampton and Dudley will declare independence from the West Midlands ‘in a matter of...
Wolverhampton & Dudley will declare independence from the West Midlands in a matter of days, the leader of the autonomous region has told the...
Shit closer to hitting fan than yesterday
Analysts and experts of faecal matters are saying that the shit, that was yesterday quite close to the fan, is now a bit closer...
Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions
President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Interflora agent admits to killing Lady Di in deathbed confession shock
Alleged deathbed confession implicates both floral delivery service and royal family in assassination plot
In a shock announcement that has been doing the rounds on...
Freestyle rapper, Rees-Moggy Mogg to win back Conservative youth vote
In a bid to appear more accessible to young people the Conservative party have updated the image of some of their more prominent MPs.
The...
BBC apologise for penis in background of May the Queen Bee
The BBC and producers of Prime Minister's Question Time show, May the Queen Bee, have today apologised for an offensive penis that appeared in...
Reality blamed for increase of violence on television
Recent studies by a team at Oxford University have found potential links between reality and the increasing portrayal of graphic violence on TV.
Many of...
Reading the Daily Mail causes cancer of the soul
Following sickening reports of yet another moron mowing down innocent pedestrians, the Daily Mail has excelled itself by implying that the victims were to...
Henry Bolton Declares vote of No Confidence in UKIP
UKIP leader Henry Bolton has declared a unilateral vote of no confidence in UKIP. Bolton has spoken out tonight, claiming that he wants to...
Is Daily Mail Editor Paul Dacre the most flaccid cockgoblin in the UK?
Unsubstantiated sources allege Dacre is comfortably the vilest hate-peddling shitweasel in the UK.
Feel free to tell us if you disagree with these allegations. But...
Theresa May to meet voters to tell them to fuck off in person
The results are in and Theresa May is to remain Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, sort of, probably for a bit at least...
Queen gives blessing for Meghan to marry Prince Harry
The Queen has signalled her approval for Meghan Markle to marry Prince Harry Kane.
Despite her recent wedding to that "Bastard" (sic) ginger grandson of...
Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto
Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban.
This appears to be the result of him mishearing...
Obviously McCanns done it, case closed by bloke down the pub
After ten years everybody and their dog is still absolutely convinced that they know exactly what happened in the Maddie McCann tragedy in Portugal.
“It’s...
Patriotic billionaire Brexit supporter patriotically moves headquarters to Singapore
A Brexit supporting patriotic billionaire is so confident that Brexit is good for business that he's decided to move the headquarters of his business...
We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond
Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...
