Man looking for God admits he would be easier to find if he knew...
A Rochdale man has today admitted that it would have been much easier to find God had he known what God looks like.
Garry Bennett began...
Trump Presidency revealed as elaborate Duke Brothers $1 bet
Reclusive Wall Street tycoons the Duke Brothers have been at it again, this time betting against US Democracy.
Pro Brexit MP’s walk out of Brexit meeting rather than face reality
Several Brexit-supporting MPs walked out of a meeting on Brexit today when a report proved to be too gloomy.
“I was expecting the report to...
Scientists baffled as average IQ of North Korea drops 20% this afternoon
SScientists around the world are struggling to make sense of strange information coming out of North Korea this afternoon after the average IQ of...
Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW
A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Government votes to go on holiday early after solving all UK’s problems
Members of parliament have overwhelmingly voted to bring their summer break forward as a reward for having solved all of the UK's problems.
The...
2016 maintains the Status Quo
2016 has been everybody's annus horibilis, and it is with great regret that we announce the death of Status Quo legend Rick Parfitt.
Having survived...
Rochdale Herald boycotts future White House coverage
In a shock announcement, the Founding Editor of this esteemed organ has declared it will be withdrawing from future coverage of the current White House...
New bay platform at Rochdale station opens
Great news for Rochdalians!
As of October there are now 4- count em! 4- platforms at the beautiful train station!
The new platform - actually a...
Ralphs to go back to original pronunciation
Ralphs across the globe have collectively decided that they no longer like being called 'Raif'.
Ralph Johnson of Middleton said;
"Because Ralph Fiennes started calling himself...
Evil Tory bastards sign off on pay increase for 1.3 million NHS workers
Over a million NHS staff including front line nurses and paramedics are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.
Islam a lifestyle choice, says man who chose rabidly Islamophobic lifestyle
In a desperate attempt to justify religious persecution, a foaming bigot from Croydon has declared that Islam is a lifestyle choice and therefore fair...
Herald Editor Treated For Shock After Finding Journalism in Daily Mirror
The Editor of the Rochdale Herald is recuperating in Rochdale General Hospital after accidentally finding some quality journalism in The Daily Mirror.
ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference
The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.
Costa kicks Conte into touch
Former Chelsea Striker Diego Costa says he did not want to leave the club on bad terms, after being dragged kicking and screaming from...
Home Office Play Matchmaker for Rochdale’s Bridget Joneses
The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in...
