Theresa May to rebrand Conservatives as People’s Front of Judea to present united front...
Many alternative names were considered. The United Front of Judean People. This was taken unfortunately by a group lead by David Davis and Sajid Javid. Splitters!
Trump in Mexican standoff
Donald Trump today paid a flying visit to Mexico for talks with President Pena Nieto.
Amongst his entourage was his new Foreign Policy adviser Jeremy...
What do people need money for? Asks man wearing suit borrowed from tramp
A man wearing a suit borrowed from a hobo went on national radio yesterday to suggest people should only be allowed to earn a maximum amount of money.
The Sun wins top spot in nationwide industry poll
Following recent scandals involving their journalists, inaccurate reporting and misinforming large sections of the population The Sun newspaper has had some positive feedback from...
BBC at a loss to explain low ratings for “Bantmeister” Grimshaw
BBC bosses are completely at a loss to explain why Nick Grimshaw's BBC Radio 1 breakfast show has suffered its biggest drop in ratings...
2016 to do 3 more ‘meh’ deaths before big ‘omfg’ finale on the 31st...
Just before everyone's new favourite actress Carrie Fisher died, 2016 did a couple of 'aw, but they had a good innings' deaths in a...
Tony Blair on the shortlist for Nobel Peace Prize
Former Prime Minister Anthony Charles Lynton "Tony" Blair has been spotted on this year's Nobel Peace Prize shortlist.
Famous for his support of fun loving...
UK’s youngest Brexit voter has died aged seventy three
We met in a small cafe in Westminster. A reporter for the Rochdale Herald and Britain's youngest Brexit supporter. Shining another glass to make...
Surgeons delighted to confirm the operation to remove Piers Morgan’s head from Donald Trump’s...
Surgeon's at London's exclusive Portland hospital have declared the Piersectomy a complete success.
In an operation that lasted 8 hours, the world's finest surgeons have...
Dogged Victory for Campaigners
The city was jubilant this morning after the news that a lengthy battle to grant one of Rochdale's most popular locations the status as...
Conor McGregor refuses to quit, offers Stephen Hawking a game of ‘da physics’
In a ground-breaking move, career punchist and all round feckin' lad Conor McGregor has revealed his plans to offer professor Stephen Hawking a game...
Grammar police call for tougher sentences
Grammar police call for tougher sentences Campaigners are calling for grammar errors to be punished with tougher sentences - especially for repeat offenders. "There...
First man to read entire Maastricht Treaty declares it “A Bugger’s Muddle”
A British diplomat who began reading the Maastricht Treaty on the 6th February 1992 "just in case" finished the entire manuscript on Sunday Evening.
Robots refusing cyber attack vaccine due to autism fears
The UK's robots have told the Government that they will refuse a vaccine that provides protection from computer viruses, over fears it could cause...
Olympics cancelled. To be replaced by international Fortnite tournament.
Reports are emerging that the International Olympic Committee has convened to discuss cancelling this year's summer Olympics.
The report, which comes to The Rochdale Herald...
Labour voter’s sciatica cured after Corbyn hug
Rochdale Labour voter Kyle Henderson has told the Herald how his sciatica was cured after he hugged Jeremy Corbyn at a Labour election rally.
Mr...
