Boris not offensive, simply misunderstood – insists Boris
Posh fop-headed press gob and Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson has defended the countless insults and faux pas he has made by claiming that each...
Katie Hopkins reluctantly buys conventional toilet after running out of platforms to shit from.
Katie Hopkins has been spotted in the bathroom section of Homebase today, after being forced to find a conventional way to dispose of her...
Norway’s female football team found in cocaine-fuelled strip club romp
Just hours after the Norwegian football association ruled that female footballer's pay must be brought in line with that of the men's, the entire...
Prince Nuttall Awakens Britain’s Slumbering Populace With A Kiss
Joyful celebrations were heard throughout the Kingdom after it was confirmed that Prince Nuttall of UKIP had awakened Princess Populace with a kiss.
Handsome Prince...
John Travolta health scare latest. It’s not Covid19, it’s just Saturday night fever.
Reports that John Travolta has contracted Covid19 are being down played by his agent.
"John has chills, they're multiplying and he's losing control" Mr Travolta's...
Remember the Wombles? Forgotten 70’s BBC stars found starving in hole in ground
In their 1970s heyday they topped the charts with popular sing-a-long anthems like "Remember You're a Womble" and "Wombling Merry Christmas."
But after the hits...
Actual grown up man wins race around France on child’s toy
An actual grown up man has won a really long race around France on a children's toy.
The Team Sky rider from Cardiff, Geraint Thomas,...
Roy Walker: he’s good, but he’s not right
Archivists who until recently worked for the TV production Carlton have uncovered a gag reel featuring Roy Walker's real responses to the utter dingbats...
Secretary of State for Education, Justine Greening shows concern for pupils “Not talk good”
In the UK, education has always been of paramount significance, on par with the National Health Service, or ensuring that MPs have enough income...
Winning a general election easier than taking benefits from orphans says woman who took...
Like the irritating eager new guy at work, dark Sith Lord and unelected PM, Theresa May, announced a snap general election 15 minutes before...
David Attenborough found alive and well
Reports are coming in this morning that despite 2017's best efforts David Attenborough has been found alive and well.
The news comes as welcome relief...
Fury as school rebrands Snow Angels Multifaith Snow Deities
A Greater Manchester primary school has today come under heavy fire from Christian groups as they took the step of dropping reference to one...
Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse announce major UK Tour from end of March
Classic rock band The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse have announced plans to get back together and hit the road in the U.K. on...
5G spreads bullshit 10 times faster than 4G say experts
Some of Britain's top scientists have issued a stark warning ahead of the long-awaited rollout of 5G mobile networks across the country.
In an exclusive...
Tory sparks by-election because… er…reasons.
Former non-dom tax shy billionaire's son and general Tory role model Zac Goldsmith has resigned from his position as a Tory MP after the...
Tommy Robinson announces plan to launch Ceefax page
Far right midget Tommy Robinson has announced plans to launch a Ceefax page following news that he has been banned from both Facebook and...
