Media

The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict. Computer giants and tax dodging bastards Apple have confirmed that the next update for its...

Millions of sex workers are suing right wing rag, The Daily Mail, after they referred to Melania Trump as a "former sex worker" in an article about her immigration status. "Listen, despite us providing an...

Following the news that Gideon "man of the people" Osborne has been appointed editor of The London Evening Standard the publishers of Backstabbers Quarterly and Twatler, Cassius and Brutus Publications, are thrilled to announce...

Yesterday, the Daily Mail sought to reset the nation's moral compass by pointing out the recent flood of speculation about Moscow waterbed shenanigans was the work of "cheap, lazy journalists who ran with fake Trump sleaze to...

Things just got real in the editorial bunker at The Rochdale Herald after those soft southern satirist impersonators at The Southend News Network went legal in the Mr Tumble plagiarism row. The letter which was...

A new advert for Gillette razors has been lauded by Piers Morgan as, "way better than all that social justice bollocks". Piers and many other single men with little else to do than call people...

The BBC’s most insightful political journalist has been discovered to be a species of parrot and awarded a delightful new name today by natural historians. Avian studies experts from the Rochdale Museum of Modern Natural...

Daily Mail readers have insisted that Dressage individual gold medalist Charlotte Dujardin is renamed Charlie Gardner as her name has been deemed "too French" for a post Brexit team GB. Echoing the move which has...

The BBC and ITV have both announced this week that they intend reviving certain 'classic' 70's sitcoms because of the current fashion for being a racist bigot. Hilary Patel-Cohen, a BBC spokesgender said, "There's a...

Sun "journo" and fist of reason, Jeremy Clarkson was recently prevented from boarding a plane in Stuttgart, Germany and he claims that the bigoted Argentinian airport worker who prevented him from doing so did...

Herald editor, Quentin D. Fortesqueue has been re-admitted to Rochdale General Hospital for surgery to remove his tongue from his cheek. The jaded and cynical hack-in-chief of Rochdale’s only quality satirical organ had very recently...

Emperor Palpatine has sensationally accused Russia of interfering in the internal affairs of the Galactic Empire. He has warned that the Empire will retaliate for Russian cyberattacks during the recent "Rogue One" theft of top...

The Rochdale Herald held an exclusive poll earlier today to find out the public's reaction on whether or not they should have to got through age verification processes in order to access Adult websites. Teen...

Big news! Corbyn, asked if the UK will leave the EU "come hell or high water" if he becomes PM, refused 6 times to say "yes". When asking their stupid question and cynically leaping on...

After recent conflicts of conscience for the Mail, yesterday's news headlines about a little boy from Aleppo in Syria has caused it to disappear in a puff of confusion.  Recent problems for the Mail involving...

Satirists around the world face extinction due to rising stupidity levels and utter fucking idiocy. "How am I supposed to write satire about this, there's literally nowhere to go? I've got a mortgage and kids...