BBC confident Planet Earth 3 will contain ‘at least 80% Attenborough’

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The BBC are desperately trying to complete series 3 of their hugely popular Planet Earth programme, as with all the fuckery 2016 has offered...
Alf Garnett

Love Thy Neighbour and Till Death do us Part set to get reboots.

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The BBC and ITV have both announced this week that they intend reviving certain 'classic' 70's sitcoms because of the current fashion for being...

Gay Muslims for Christmas – supermarket turns up the inclusion to 11 with groundbreaking...

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Pray together, lay together Scottish supermarket retailer Laldy has long sought to be a market disrupter by bringing cheap, if slightly bizarre, product, combinations. This...
Rochdale paramedics

Breaking News: Dozens Dead in Fleet Street Fire

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Several dozen journalists at The Daily Mail are feared dead whilst dozens more are critically injured after laptop computers exploded in their Northcliffe House...

Nobody knows what that Facebook fisher is going on about

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It was revealed today that nobody knows what that friend who keeps posting attention seeking statuses is actually on about.

ISIS Second In Command Killed Again

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The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command. "He was killed by...

Channel 4 on course to disappear up its own arse

6
Channel 4 have announced a new meta-programming initiative with which it hopes to exceed the success of the Gogglebox franchise. The new programming will...

Daily Mail editor on suicide watch as rumours of Mo Farah knighthood circulate

31
There are genuine fears for the editor of The Daily Mail after a Somali born Muslim Immigrant ran to a double double victory at...

Friendless satirists reduced to talking in headlines on closed satire sites

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Since the negative publicity surrounding "hoax news" networks, aka SATIRICAL FACEBOOK PAGES, much of their activity has been curtailed by certain leading executives of...
John Lewis Weasel

Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial

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The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist. "It's an...
Santa and reindeer

Fake stories exposed: Herald gets its Snopes on.

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Everyone is concerned with fake stories recently so we at the Herald have gone all Snopes and trawled the web to reveal all the...
Daily Express Readers

Daily Express launches Diana 20th anniversary commemorative sticker album

7
The Daily Express and Panini have announce the launch of a commemorative sticker album for the 20th anniversary of the late Princess Diana. Express readers...
ISIS

Daily Mail website wins ISIS award for services to Jihad

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ISIS have awarded the Daily Mail website, MailOnline.com, its prestigious Jihadi Of The Year Award. This is the first time the sought after prize, known...

iPhone users left feeling cheated

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Thousands of iPhone users around the globe were left feeling cheated this week as they eagerly awaited news of the latest model from technology...

Thousands injured after Hypocrisy Bomb detonates at Daily Mail Headquarters

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Thousands of Daily Mail employees were left hideously disfigured after an extremist hypocrisy bomb detonated under their lair at Northcliffe House.

Man with giant head appears on Ch4’s Grand Designs

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A man with an unusually massive head denies he's up his own arse after appearing on channel 4s Grand Designs. The house featured the...

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