Rochdale mum binge watched Netflix documentaries and is now blood spatter expert
52 year old mother of two Janice Longthorne has spent so many hours watching Netflix shows such as 'Making a Murderer' (seasons one and...
Daily Mail readers push uphill for Gardner
Daily Mail readers have insisted that Dressage individual gold medalist Charlotte Dujardin is renamed Charlie Gardner as her name has been deemed "too French"...
Barrack’s is at least three times bigger than Donald’s says Melania
Melania Trump has sensationally revealed that Barrack Obama has a really big one, it is at least three times the size of Donald's.
"Donald is...
Breaking News: Dozens Dead in Fleet Street Fire
Several dozen journalists at The Daily Mail are feared dead whilst dozens more are critically injured after laptop computers exploded in their Northcliffe House...
Goebbels didn’t like satire either – satirists tell Zuckerberg
As the entire world struggles to unravel themselves from their twisted knickers following the surprise election of a sexist satsuma to the Whitehouse satirists have come under fire from Google and Facebook for writing fake news, otherwise known as fiction.
Prince Philip to star in new season of The Walking Dead
There are rumours circulating today that Prince Philip will get a central role in a new series of, The Walking Dead.
The show depicts characters...
BBC Believes Last Labour Voter Now Extinct
Naturalists have accused the BBC of poor science after it was revealed the broadcasting corporation believes there are no more Labour voters.
The shock extinction...
Major newspapers not really committed to calling for reform of tax avoidance system for...
The readership of Britain's newspapers say they're confused that the papers aren't being more assertive in calling for tax reform.
Right wing press connoisseur, Cliff...
Rochdale Herald editor drowns in tragic Daily Mail tractor accident
In an incident uncannily similar to the fate of controversial media proprietor, Robert Maxwell, who apparently drowned after falling from his private yacht, an...
Katie Hopkins reluctantly buys conventional toilet after running out of platforms to shit from.
Katie Hopkins has been spotted in the bathroom section of Homebase today, after being forced to find a conventional way to dispose of her...
Daily Mail issue apology for calling white mosque shooter a terrorist
There was chaos in The Daily Mail Newsroom this morning as they scrambled to reset copy before going to press after the gunman who...
We’re nothing like Trump Supporters insist lone wolves
Lone wolves are said to be up in arms this afternoon after CNN compared them to Trump Supporter and Canadian mosque shooter Alexandre Bissonnette.
Thickos more likely to believe any old bollocks scientists reveal
Scientists at Rochdale Community university have discovered that thickos will believe pretty much anything they see on Facebook
Microsoft worker takes Apple to court
Yesterday, a Microsoft employee allegedly got a dressing down from High Court judge, the Right Honorable Justice Antony Smyth-Tomkinson. The employee who we cannot...
More Guardian Subscriptions Cancelled Over Fresh Crossword Slur
Following yesterday's scandal that saw literally units of enraged Scotts cancelling their subscriptions, The Guardian's simple crossword this morning poured fresh fuel onto the...
Newspaper sellers to take precautions.
Newsagents and shops where papers are sold all over the UK are being urged by the Health and Safety Executive to take extra precautions...
