Laura Kuenssberg is a parrot confirm scientists analysing Twitter
The BBC’s most insightful political journalist has been discovered to be a species of parrot and awarded a delightful new name today by natural...
‘Child on hospital floor’ journalist joins the Rochdale Herald’s staff
The Rochdale Herald is proud to announce the appointment of surely-ex-by-now Telegraph columnist Allison Pearson to our staff.
"Our quest for people who can spout...
Channel 4 on course to disappear up its own arse
Channel 4 have announced a new meta-programming initiative with which it hopes to exceed the success of the Gogglebox franchise. The new programming will...
Daily Mail website wins ISIS award for services to Jihad
ISIS have awarded the Daily Mail website, MailOnline.com, its prestigious Jihadi Of The Year Award.
This is the first time the sought after prize, known...
BBC to put Sir David Attenborough in a ‘stasis chamber’
The specialist chamber housing Sir David Attenborough was created by NASA for long haul space travel and would have allowed Astronauts to be put...
BBC Resolves Gender Pay Gap Crisis
Human Resources managers at the BBC have worked tirelessly throughout the weekend (completing two days of back-to-back 6 hour shifts with reduced
ginseng tea...
Prince Philip to star in new season of The Walking Dead
There are rumours circulating today that Prince Philip will get a central role in a new series of, The Walking Dead.
The show depicts characters...
I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Hearse
The Rochdale Herald has learned that ITV plans to make drastic changes to the format of next year's 'I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of...
Sun to be sold in paper bag
The Sun newspaper is to be sold with a free brown paper bag from next week, it was revealed on that Twitter thingy today.
“From...
Daily Mail editor spontaneously combusts in Syrian child refugee logic feedback loop tragedy
After recent conflicts of conscience for the Mail, yesterday's news headlines about a little boy from Aleppo in Syria has caused it to disappear...
Daily Express forecasts two feet of dead pensioners will fall in Central London by...
The Daily Express has warned readers that 20% of them will die this week because of the "Beast from the east".
Pensioner, Stan Still said,...
Suspicious package at Daily Mail confirmed as charity collection box
The suspicious package at Daily Mail HQ is a charity collection box for Syrian refugees.
No-one is quite sure how it got there but it’s been confirmed...
Fake news reporting undermining professionals
Following the news that the owner of everyone's favourite dog and Facebook creator, Mark Zuckerberg has called to investigate fake news sites and exercise...
Newspaper that regularly features Princess Diana’s ghost denies allegations of fake news
Staff at the Daily Express have been forced to deny that their publication is a tissue of lies and fake news even though it...
Daily Mail Editor sectioned after being confused by photograph of white terrorist
The Editor of The Daily Mail was carried out of Northcliffe House in a straitjacket this morning after a photograph of a white man...
Daily Mail reveal African poverty is a load of old tosh
The Daily Mail today have exclusively revealed that African poverty is rubbish and was invented by Oxfam as a way of making a quick...
