Princess Diana’s ghost gives Express readers advice on how to deal with slippery driving...
The ghost of Diana, Thingy of Wales, has been giving Daily Express readers advice on how to survive the cold weather.
Speaking through a medium,...
Liberal hospitalised after catching racism from Daily Mail
A Rochdale man has been admitted to a psychiatric hospital today after contracting racism from a close encounter with the Daily Mail.
Colin Nigelsson, a...
ISIS Second In Command Killed Again
The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command.
"He was killed by...
Channel 4 on course to disappear up its own arse
Channel 4 have announced a new meta-programming initiative with which it hopes to exceed the success of the Gogglebox franchise. The new programming will...
Legendary comic Tony Blair wins prestigious award
Tony Blair, one half of iconic comedy duo The World Leaders, has been honoured with the prestigious Lincoln Leadership in Comedy Prize with particular...
Assange ready to be extradited from his own arse
Julian Assange has confirmed that he is willing to be extradited from his own arse following Barack Obama’s decision to commute the sentence of US Army...
Satirists face existential crisis
Satirists around the world face extinction due to rising stupidity levels and utter fucking idiocy.
"How am I supposed to write satire about this, there's...
Twitter removes blue tick from Donald Trump’s account
In the latest shake-up to twitter's format, the website have taken to removing the ticks from people for various reasons. Hatemongers have been particularly...
Idris Elba to play Jeremy Corbyn in upcoming Cold War spy thriller
Idris Elba is to be cast as Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn in a new spy thriller set during the height of The Cold War.
The...
Daily Mail and Newthump one and the same?
Rumours are riff in the cut throat world of satire that just like Michael and Latoya Jackson were almost definitely the same person the...
Corbyn’s meeting with Czech spy definitely ended The Cold War claims The Canary
The Canary has made the suprising claim that Jeremy Corbyn's meeting with a Czech spy hastened the end of the cold war. The claim...
Comic Relief to be just Michael McIntyre and a bunch of Russells in future
The BBC announced today that all future Comic Relief events will simply be Michael McIntyre and people called Russell running around and doing observational...
Daily Mail Editor suicidal with remorse over Jo Cox murder immigrant headline jibe
There were scenes of jubilation around the country this afternoon after Paul Dacre "did the decent thing" and shot himself with a revolver after drinking half a bottle of scotch at Northcliffe House.
Rochdale Herald distances itself from Rochdale Herald Online question whether Daily Mail Editor Paul...
We are aware this may make us appear terribly foolish. The Rochdale Herald Editor, the late Quentin D Fortesqueue, is seething about the lack of...
Prince Philip to star in new season of The Walking Dead
There are rumours circulating today that Prince Philip will get a central role in a new series of, The Walking Dead.
The show depicts characters...
Crystal Maze to return as literally no ideas left
The Crystal Maze is set to return our screens, again;
"The barrel has no bottom. There's nothing left to scrape anymore. This is it." Said...
