BBC confident Planet Earth 3 will contain ‘at least 80% Attenborough’

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The BBC are desperately trying to complete series 3 of their hugely popular Planet Earth programme, as with all the fuckery 2016 has offered...

Daily Mail Editor suicidal with remorse over Jo Cox murder immigrant headline jibe

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There were scenes of jubilation around the country this afternoon after Paul Dacre "did the decent thing" and shot himself with a revolver after drinking half a bottle of scotch at Northcliffe House.

OED to introduce new terms for despicable journalism

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Following some recent "newspaper" headlines, a source at the Oxford English Dictionary has revealed some new words to be introduced to accurately describe some...
Michael McIntyre

Comic Relief to be just Michael McIntyre and a bunch of Russells in future

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The BBC announced today that all future Comic Relief events will simply be Michael McIntyre and people called Russell running around and doing observational...
Sandi Toksvig

Pound for Pound Sandi Toksvig is paid same as Stephen Fry for hosting QI...

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Following the publication of the salaries paid to its top stars the BBC has rushed to deny reports that QI presenter Sandi Toksvig was...
Ross and Rachel

Chilcot Report reveals Ross and Rachel WERE on a break

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With the kind of speed, thoroughness and ability to keep his finger on Britain’s zeitgeist that has come to be expected from him, the...

Thickos more likely to believe any old bollocks scientists reveal

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Scientists at Rochdale Community university have discovered that thickos will believe pretty much anything they see on Facebook

Liberal hospitalised after catching racism from Daily Mail

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A Rochdale man has been admitted to a psychiatric hospital today after contracting racism from a close encounter with the Daily Mail.  Colin Nigelsson, a...
Karen Danczuk Topless

Herald Reporter in KAREN DANCZUK TOPLESS Clickbait Scandal

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Following the implementation of new software allowing users to see just what exactly brings visitors to their website based on Googled search terms, a local...

Piers Morgan distraught after accidentally flushing article down the bog

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He'd just logged on Vox populi Piers Morgan (yeah I used Latin, deal with it, what comic do you think you're reading, the Mail?) has...

Jeremy Vine in road rage incident.

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Television and radio opinion blower Jeremy Vine was subjected to a road rage incident while cycling to work in London yesterday.  He was followed and...

New York Times Reported to the House Committee for Un-American Activities

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The New York Times, long considered to be the lap-dog mouthpiece of the Commie-loving East-coast foreigner, has finally (and thankfully) been reported to the...
Tory

There’s nothing funny about the Tories moan satirists

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Satirists up and down the country are throwing their pens and finger bashing the backspace key in frustration. "It's the bloody Tories" said one writer...

Let’s Get Ready to TUMBLE!

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Things just got real in the editorial bunker at The Rochdale Herald after those soft southern satirist impersonators at The Southend News Network went...

Further scandal as so called satirical page Southend News Network owners aren’t even Southern!

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In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at...

Southern Rail Timetable wins Man Booker Prize for fiction

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The visionary author of Southern Rail's timetable, Bernard Jones, has been announced as the seventh winner of the Man Booker International Prize for fiction. The...

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