Piers Morgan distraught after accidentally flushing article down the bog
He'd just logged on
Vox populi Piers Morgan (yeah I used Latin, deal with it, what comic do you think you're reading, the Mail?) has...
BBC Believes Last Labour Voter Now Extinct
Naturalists have accused the BBC of poor science after it was revealed the broadcasting corporation believes there are no more Labour voters.
The shock extinction...
Daily Mail editor accused of Crocodile Tears following Polish migrant murder
The editor of poisonous bog roll manufacturer, The Daily Mail, was accused of shedding crocodile tears by The Rochdale Herald after a Polish man...
Michael Gove announced as editor of Unbelievable Bastard Magazine
Following the news that Gideon "man of the people" Osborne has been appointed editor of The London Evening Standard the publishers of Backstabbers Quarterly...
Terror as scientists find link between Daily Mail and racist pensioners
Following an uncomfortable family dinner with her parents, local woman Karen Smith, 28, reported to friends yesterday that she fears mirroring their gradual decline...
Kelvin Mackenzie is a bellend says South Yorkshire Police
South Yorkshire Police have taken the bold move to publicly call the former editor of the The Sun, Kelvin Mackenzie a "complete bellend" over...
Satirists face existential crisis
Satirists around the world face extinction due to rising stupidity levels and utter fucking idiocy.
"How am I supposed to write satire about this, there's...
BBC to put Sir David Attenborough in a ‘stasis chamber’
The specialist chamber housing Sir David Attenborough was created by NASA for long haul space travel and would have allowed Astronauts to be put...
Herald Editor Treated For Shock After Finding Journalism in Daily Mirror
The Editor of the Rochdale Herald is recuperating in Rochdale General Hospital after accidentally finding some quality journalism in The Daily Mirror.
Christian Groups outraged as Multi-faith revamp of Teletubbies features NO Christian Character
Rochdale's creative industry seemingly received a huge boost last week as local TV production firm, Hot Pot Productions, was awarded a £6 million BBC...
Liberal hospitalised after catching racism from Daily Mail
A Rochdale man has been admitted to a psychiatric hospital today after contracting racism from a close encounter with the Daily Mail.
Colin Nigelsson, a...
Nobody Offended By Twitter Joke
A joke posted on Twitter yesterday has met with a complete lack of offence for the first time in history.
The joke which reads "Most...
Specsavers Official Sponsors Of WWIII
Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company...
Liberal elite should stop bullying Stalin says Daily Mail
The Daily Mail has instructed its readers to avoid the film, The Death of Stalin.
In an editorial piece the Mail said, "This film...
Laura Kuenssberg to train North Korean propaganda journalists
Gajja Ileum, a journalist for the Korean Worker's Party, has travelled from Pyongyang to London for a 2 week intensive training course in State Propaganda with...
Rochdale Herald editor drowns in tragic Daily Mail tractor accident
In an incident uncannily similar to the fate of controversial media proprietor, Robert Maxwell, who apparently drowned after falling from his private yacht, an...
