BBC confident Planet Earth 3 will contain ‘at least 80% Attenborough’
The BBC are desperately trying to complete series 3 of their hugely popular Planet Earth programme, as with all the fuckery 2016 has offered...
Star in a really cross flight bar
Sun "journo" and fist of reason, Jeremy Clarkson was recently prevented from boarding a plane in Stuttgart, Germany and he claims that the bigoted...
David Attenborough found alive and well
Reports are coming in this morning that despite 2017's best efforts David Attenborough has been found alive and well.
The news comes as welcome relief...
Gay Muslims for Christmas – supermarket turns up the inclusion to 11 with groundbreaking...
Pray together, lay together
Scottish supermarket retailer Laldy has long sought to be a market disrupter by bringing cheap, if slightly bizarre, product, combinations.
This...
Editor of satirical Newspaper “not convinced” readers know what satire means
The editor of a satirical newspaper was reported to have his head in his hands after 60,000 people read an article he'd written about...
Radio 2 announces replacement of all Christmas songs with Call to Prayer to avoid...
If you want any chance of hearing any of your favourite Christmas tunes, then you better tune in to this week.
Radio 2 has today...
Don’t buy the Daily Mail on 31 August
It's the 20th anniversary of the death of Princess Diana. Remember her, if you will. Pray for her and her family, if that's your...
Channel 4 on course to disappear up its own arse
Channel 4 have announced a new meta-programming initiative with which it hopes to exceed the success of the Gogglebox franchise. The new programming will...
I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Hearse
The Rochdale Herald has learned that ITV plans to make drastic changes to the format of next year's 'I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of...
Idris Elba to play Jeremy Corbyn in upcoming Cold War spy thriller
Idris Elba is to be cast as Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn in a new spy thriller set during the height of The Cold War.
The...
Heroic ‘fragile snowflake’ Piers Morgan attempts to man up by sitting on a sofa
Piers Morgan will today make a daring attempt to return to doing what he does best. Sitting on his arse while regurgitating tripe about...
Daily Mail wins award for inciteful journalism
The Daily Mail Editor has collected another prestigious award, in a glittering events ceremony in the Dubai International Finance Centre (“DIFC”).
Editor Paul Dacre...
Piers Morgan distraught after accidentally flushing article down the bog
He'd just logged on
Vox populi Piers Morgan (yeah I used Latin, deal with it, what comic do you think you're reading, the Mail?) has...
Accusations of Racism Hit John Lewis Commercial
The new John Lewis advert, featuring a black British family giving their daughter a trampoline for Christmas has been denounced as racist.
"It's an...
Daily Mail issue apology for calling white mosque shooter a terrorist
There was chaos in The Daily Mail Newsroom this morning as they scrambled to reset copy before going to press after the gunman who...
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