Rochdale Herald Editor Re-admitted to Hospital
Herald editor, Quentin D. Fortesqueue has been re-admitted to Rochdale General Hospital for surgery to remove his tongue from his cheek.
The jaded and cynical...
Taking are speling back!
The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict.
Computer giants and tax dodging...
Massive twat claims moral high ground
Yesterday, the Daily Mail sought to reset the nation's moral compass by pointing out the recent flood of speculation about Moscow waterbed shenanigans was the work of...
Liberal elite should stop bullying Stalin says Daily Mail
The Daily Mail has instructed its readers to avoid the film, The Death of Stalin.
In an editorial piece the Mail said, "This film...
Daily Mail claim Koran found propping up wobbly table leg in Thomas Mair’s kitchen
In a shocking turn of events, the Daily Mail have claimed police forensics have revealed to them that during the investigation into Thomas Mair...
Brian Cox apologises for insisting Things Can Only Get Better
Astrologer to the stars Professor Brian Cox has finally come clean about his greatest fib told way back in 1993.
Daily Mail Readers confused more toddlers haven’t walked alone to UK from Syria
Daily Mail Readers are confused more toddlers haven't walked the 2,000 miles to Calais from Syria.
Daily Mail editor spontaneously combusts in Syrian child refugee logic feedback loop tragedy
After recent conflicts of conscience for the Mail, yesterday's news headlines about a little boy from Aleppo in Syria has caused it to disappear...
Suspicious package at Daily Mail confirmed as charity collection box
The suspicious package at Daily Mail HQ is a charity collection box for Syrian refugees.
No-one is quite sure how it got there but it’s been confirmed...
Woman wins “I’ve got no self respect, get me out of here!”
A woman called Scarlett Moffat, who you've probably never heard of or will again, has won the annual competition to see just how far...
Twitter removes blue tick from Donald Trump’s account
In the latest shake-up to twitter's format, the website have taken to removing the ticks from people for various reasons. Hatemongers have been particularly...
Channel 4 on course to disappear up its own arse
Channel 4 have announced a new meta-programming initiative with which it hopes to exceed the success of the Gogglebox franchise. The new programming will...
Gary Lineker to present MOTD in bejewelled jockstrap if BBC scrap gender pay gap
Following the release of salaries of high profile staff at the BBC one of the highest paid stars has vowed to make a stand.
Former...
Satirists run out of ink
Thousands of satirists across the UK and their tens of readers around the world face a crisis as the supplies of ink slowed to...
We’re nothing like Trump Supporters insist lone wolves
Lone wolves are said to be up in arms this afternoon after CNN compared them to Trump Supporter and Canadian mosque shooter Alexandre Bissonnette.
Mr Tumble to sue SNN
The much loved CBBC presenter Mr. Tumble, aka Justin Fletcher MBE, has set the wheels in motion with his legal team to issue Southend...
