John Lewis advert “Darkly Sinister”
John Lewis, purveyors of things that ultimately no one needs or wants, has made everything better with a darkly sinister tale about a black...
Labour apologise for accidentally not running over Laura Kuenssberg
The Labour Party leadership have taken to social media today to whole heartedly apologise for accidentally running over a BBC Cameraman, Giles Woolerton, this morning.
There’s nothing funny about the Tories moan satirists
Satirists up and down the country are throwing their pens and finger bashing the backspace key in frustration.
"It's the bloody Tories" said one writer...
Rochdale mum binge watched Netflix documentaries and is now blood spatter expert
52 year old mother of two Janice Longthorne has spent so many hours watching Netflix shows such as 'Making a Murderer' (seasons one and...
Daily Mail aiming to eradicate all racism by 2080
The Daily Mail is aiming to eradicate all racism by 2080 it has announced.
Building on its highly successful campaign against anti-Semitism in the Labour...
Shock as Canary dies from its own gas
Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt was today in a position where he wasn’t just on the right, but in the right. That’s about as galling...
People who say Nazis were socialists to lose human status
The UN has today confirmed that anyone who says Nazis were socialist are to lose human status, joining holocaust deniers in the shortlist of...
Some bloke in UKIP said something about the BBC
Bill Etheridge, a candidate for hard right conservative comedy troupe UKIP has said that the BBC should be privatised because it's "shoving left wing...
Local journalist creates entire article from on line forum comments.
A journalist at a Sheffield local newspaper has admitted that an entire article published in Friday's edition of the Sheffield Councilpleaser was constructed entirely...
Princess Diana’s ghost gives Express readers advice on how to deal with slippery driving...
The ghost of Diana, Thingy of Wales, has been giving Daily Express readers advice on how to survive the cold weather.
Speaking through a medium,...
Terror as scientists find link between Daily Mail and racist pensioners
Following an uncomfortable family dinner with her parents, local woman Karen Smith, 28, reported to friends yesterday that she fears mirroring their gradual decline...
Putin Accused in Rogue One Plan Hack Report
Emperor Palpatine has sensationally accused Russia of interfering in the internal affairs of the Galactic Empire.
He has warned that the Empire will retaliate for...
Daily Mail outrage as child placed with Muslim foster parents not with Christian child...
The Daily Mail and its readers have reacted with fury after a child was placed with a Muslim foster family due to a lack...
Telegraph journalist executes her integrity with call to murder politician
Sane people all over the country were horrified, but largely unsurprised, that right-wing publication the Daily Telegraph had called for a political leader...
Local Liberal Claims To Only Visit Daily Mail Website For The Tits And Ass
Rochdale liberal Gerard Sutherland has told his wife that he only visits the Daily Mail website for the Z-list 'celebrity' tits and ass, and...
Newspaper sellers to take precautions.
Newsagents and shops where papers are sold all over the UK are being urged by the Health and Safety Executive to take extra precautions...
