NHS admit to clicking ‘remind me later’ on McAfee update for seven years straight

0
NHS digital has come under fire from computer security professionals; as an investigation into yesterday's Malware virus has revealed NHS used McAfee and hadn't updated it...
Doctor Who

New Doctor Who to charge for consultations according to Jeremy Hunt

0
As science fiction fans eagerly await the announcement from the BBC about the identity of the umpteenth actor to play the timelord, The Rochdale...

Man Flu Worse Than AIDS Cancer And Ebola Combined Say Scientists

0
We've all heard of the dreaded Man Flu in our time, but a team of scientists in Rochdale have finally catalogued the full effects. “The...
Cross Eyed Man

The light shines out of my arse, says man who got toothpaste and Anusol...

8
Rochdale resident Des Spondent, 46, was getting ready for work one dark morning when the mix-up occurred. The sores in his mouth miraculously healed, and...

British Public shocked to learn Pizza and San Miguel not Mediterranean Diet

0
Rochdalians are being reminded today that having a deep pan 16 inch spicy meat special doesn't count as following a Mediterranean diet- even if...

Hunt solves NHS waiting list crisis with introduction of geological clock

0
Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has solved the problem of NHS waiting times by making hospitals use the geological clock.  After coming under increasing pressure from...
Doctors

You can’t lock up surgeons for behaving like sociopaths, we’d have none left rules...

0
The NHS breathed a deep sigh of relief today after Judge Ian Pringle QC ruled that you can't send surgeons to prison just for behaving like coked up sociopaths.
Mike Pence

Pray for your health suckers says Mike Pence

0
The Rev Mike Pence, deputy pastor at the Church of the Poison Mind, Washington, DC, has been quoted as saying "What the American people need...

Anti-Vaxxer has very messy carpet

0
In an ironic twist that would give Alanis Morissette a run for her money, local Anti-Vaxx campaigner Tarquin O'Flerfer is reported to have a...
Theresa May

Theresa May Sectioned for safety after gibberish speech about Brexit

0
The Prime Minister was taken into protective custody at a secure mental health unit this afternoon, for her own safety. A spokesperson for Meadows and...

NHS partner with WhatsApp to reboot IT project

0
In a move to reduce costs and breathe new life into the long-abandoned £11.4 billion Centralised Records System, the NHS has announced a partnership...

UKIP Politician selling more than just political lies

0
Welsh UKIPper, Andrew “IQ not very” Haigh doesn't just sell bullshit through his party, it transpires. The national organiser for Wales also sells utter bollocks...

Daily Express reveal AIDS originally created by Corbyn as anti-Tory bio-weapon

6
Ground-breaking new research by Daily Express reveals Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn, created a modern day plague in league with the IRA As we all know,...

World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field

0
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale. One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...

Rochdale sex romp for Ozone Day

0
Friday 16th of September was World Ozone Day but residents of a care home in Rochdale have been getting hot under the collar after...

STD’s seek Brexit freedom of movement assurances

0
Several prominent sexually-transmitted infections have today sought assurances from the Government that Brexit will not have a negative impact on their European transmission rates.  In an...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts