Farage delighted to be named UK’s top racist

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Following numerous occasions where he was always the bridesmaid, Nigel Farage is now delighted to be at the top of his tree in his...

Katie Price Fails 5 Minutes Into Her Attempt To Go A Whole Day Without...

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Three days ago the former glamour model Katie Price, also known as Libya, attempted to last a whole day without doing anything to publicise...

Elderly white bloke invoking blitz spirit wins Brexit’s Got Talent

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In an emotional final show, 102 year old Tommy Atkins held off challengers by singing Vera Lynn songs in a quavering voice in front...
Jeremy Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn wins prestigious Tony Blair peace prize

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Jeremy Corbyn has been awarded the prestigious Tony Blair peace prize and the Rochdale Herald is the only news outlet to report it. The prize...

Joe Swanson elected leader of the Liberal Democrats

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The popular ex-policeman is predicted to cause almost as many people to support the Lib Dems as the leaders of the Labour and Conservative...
Russell Brand

Russell Brand in hot water again for ‘pranking’ Andrews Sachs’ granddaughter

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Long haired Labour killer and plastic revolutionary, Russell Brand, has come under fire once again this morning after 'pranking' the granddaughter of the late...

Mary, Mel and Sue to present new slapstick kids tv show ‘The Cackle...

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The trio who recently opted out of any future appearances on Great British Bake Off after its acquisition by Channel 4 announced the news...

Safety fears for Peter André.

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Fears are growing for the safety of shiny mannequin Peter André, after he failed to appear on the cover of this month's OK Magazine....

Mary Berry to retire from television

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With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement...

God Issues Apology For 2016 Celebrity Cull

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In an official statement released this afternoon, God has apologised for the ongoing massacre of talent this year, blaming it on recent pressure to...
Bono

U2 Twatty Helps Unfunny Fatty

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Following squeaking chubbalub unfunnyman James Corden's desperately misjudged and humourless attempts at making light of sexual assault, professional shortarsed twat and frontman of puzzlingy...

Robbie Williams comes undone at World Cup opening ceremony

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Robbie Williams finds himself in trouble after giving the finger to fans at World Cup opening ceremony after repeatedly being asked to sing 'This...

Prince Philip to reprise role in new Star Wars film

7
His Royal Highness to play part of Grand Moff Tarkin again in latest outing of sci-fi saga. Warning: contains spoilers Shooting began today for the latest...

Terror in the skies over Manchester airport!

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There was panic and pandemonium on a Jet2 flight to Rhodes yesterday morning when the editor of The Rochdale Herald, Quentin Q Fortesqueue, realised...

Katie Hopkins outraged as new IPhone X automatically set to permanently disabled and unable...

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Odious journo-babbler, Katie Hopkins was furious yesterday when she discovered that her new IPhone X was in fact less use than Boris Johnson in...

Woman wins “I’ve got no self respect, get me out of here!”

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A woman called Scarlett Moffat, who you've probably never heard of or will again, has won the annual competition to see just how far...

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