Ketty Hopkins joins GB equestrian team
Horse faced professional turd and former Daily Mail columnist Katie Hopkins has apparently been offered a new job by the GB olympic equestrian team.
Katie,...
Rochdale Rap Star Arrested On Drug Charges
Hip hop maestro and rap superstar, 30 Bob, from Milnrow Rochdale, was arrested last week on drugs charges we can exclusively reveal.
In a statement...
Bruce Forsyth ‘can’t wait’ to draw his pension
Following the news today that the government of the United Kingdom will shortly be raising the retirement age to 168 years old Bruce Forsyth...
Mary Berry to retire from television
With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement...
Prince William fingers Kate in back of hatchback in Rochdale
A sticker showing Prince William and The Duchess of Cambridge along with a depiction of two fingers raised in a V sign has caused...
Harvey Weinstein’s office pot plant to release cover of Louis Armstrong’s Nobody Knows The...
Harvey Weinstein’s office pot plant, a large Ficus Lyrata Bambino, is to going to release a seven inch cover of the 1921 classic “Nobody...
Melania Trump reveals her favourite iPod Playlist
In an exclusive interview with The Rochdale Herald the former Eastern European 'model' and wife of President Elect Donald Trump revealed her favourite iPod playlist.
Hard Core Fans Dismayed as PJ Harvey Admires Theresa May’s Shoes
Hardcore fans of uncompromising musician Polly Jean (PJ) Harvey have reacted angrily to their musical idol expressing admiration for Prime Minister Theresa Mary May's...
Spacey “to seek treatment” for being horny 20 years ago and coincidentally gay
The publicist for Kevin Spacey has announced that the Oscar-winning actor is seeking treatment, as reports emerged that another young man had nothing happen...
Oscars goodie bag to include DNA evidence gathering kits
Celebrities will be receiving goodie bags at the Oscars with kits for collecting and preserving DNA in them.
The goodie bags, given to Oscar winners...
All Your Faves Dying Just Preparation for apocalypse
2016 has seen the death of pretty much every famous person you like. We interviewed Death yesterday to find out why:
"I KNOW PEOPLE ARE...
Martin Roberts Demands Recount.
Property botherer and dreadful chef Martin Roberts has demanded a recount following his failure to be elected President of the Jungle in this year's...
Fauxtrage as Woman Responds Rationally to Death of Celebrity
A woman has rationally told a few friends, in person and not on social media, that she was sorry to hear about the death of a famous film star.
Meat Loaf isn’t dead
Apparently Meat Loaf isn't dead and has a new album coming out, on account of still being alive.
The big breasted Fight Club singer apparently...
Jeremy Clarkson’s views are irrelevant say other ageing xenophobic white people
Daily Express readers were quite literally fuming yesterday after tall gammon icon and keen casual racist Jeremy Clarkson referred to Brexit voters as 'coffin...
Bruce Forsyth’s inheritance to be shown on conveyor belt for family members to remember
If the children of the late Sir Bruce Forsyth wish to inherit his estate, they must remember the individual parts of it that they...
