Piers Morgan to be face of ‘Free The Ballbag’ campaign

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Piers Morgan has been revealed as the new face of men's rights campaign 'Free the Ballbag'. Inspired by the feminist 'Free The Nipple' movement, the...

Fatboy runs away from the Ball

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The worlds biggest celebrity couple, Ball and Slim, have sadly announced they are to divorce after 18 years of party-hard marriage.

Trump Introduces 2020 Presidential Campaign Mascot

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President Trump took to the stage in Nuremberg, Florida, on Saturday in front of a crowd seen from space, to unveil his mascot for...

McVitie’s and Walkers crisps back plans to decriminalise cannabis

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Mcvities and Walkers crisps have allegedly got behind a backbench revolt to decriminalise cannabis. Plans are already being made to reclassify cannabis from a class...

Mary Berry to retire from television

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With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement...

God Issues Apology For 2016 Celebrity Cull

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In an official statement released this afternoon, God has apologised for the ongoing massacre of talent this year, blaming it on recent pressure to...
Ed Balls

Happy Ed Balls Day

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You know that feeling: the kids rush into your room at some ungodly morning hour and excitedly demand to know, “Has he been? Has...
Pot Plant

Harvey Weinstein’s office pot plant to release cover of Louis Armstrong’s Nobody Knows The...

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Harvey Weinstein’s office pot plant, a large Ficus Lyrata Bambino, is to going to release a seven inch cover of the 1921 classic “Nobody...

Debbie Reynolds Posthumously Wins 2016’s Most Competitive Mum Award

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A bad week for the Reynolds family ended on a high note today as mother Debbie was posthumously awarded the Virgin Mary Award for...

Attention seeker Brian Harvey arrested after sending himself abusive Tweets

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Former East 17 Band member and serial own foot shooter Brian Harvey is said to be in trouble with the police over alleged malicious...
Ant and Dec

Failure To Recognise Ant And Dec Improves Corbyn’s Ratings

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All the hard political questions have now been thrown at Jeremy Corbyn and Owen Smith in their hustings, including asking if they recognised Ant...

Tommy Robinson announces plan to launch Ceefax page

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Far right midget Tommy Robinson has announced plans to launch a Ceefax page following news that he has been banned from both Facebook and...

Ban on new celebrity Chefs

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The government is set to introduce legislation preventing the creation of new celebrity Chefs, after pretentiousness levels in the UK became toxic. It...

Gary Glitter releases Christmas single, In the Brownies

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Gary Glitter is releasing a new single in time for the Christmas number 1 battle. The song, a cover version of "In the Brownies" is...

Issue I keep reminding everyone of hurting my reputation, says Cliff

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Cliff Richard, the long term bachelor and non-nonce, who our lawyers remind us isn't gay either, has been talking to the tabloid newspapers about...

Colombia fears double dip recession following death of Tara Palmer-Tomkinson

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Government officials in Colombia have issued warnings of a double dip recession following the death of former "it girl" Tara Palmer-Tomkinson. Former socialite and...

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