Marriage fan Angelina Jolie revealed yesterday that she was well on track to break the late Elizabeth Taylor’s Hollywood record of eight marriages and seven husbands.

Following a series of short marriages to Johnny Lee Miller and Billy Bob Thornton between 1996 and 2003 she took a nine year marriage hiatus to concentrate on other records including most adoptions and the world’s worst biopic.

A spokesorphan told us that she has been hankering after another really big record after losing weirdest names for children to Jamie Oliver following the birth of his son Bukkake Cheesecake Oliver last year.

Apparently the plan is to nail down six more marriages before 2026 including at least one more marriage to Brad Pitt.

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.